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Original poster

Have you told anyone you're TTC?

13 replies

madonnawhore · 13/02/2013 08:43

I've told a couple of close friends. Just so I've got someone other than poor old DP to help stop me obsessing and going bonkers.

Is it a bad idea to have told anyone?

OP posts:
thistlelicker · 13/02/2013 08:47

It's good to have support! I had a miscarriage in December and were now in a position to start trying but I feel alot of pressure from a friend who knows we are ttc !! Others they are fine, they know we just going with the flow Wink but with her it's every day "how's the trying" ... Becoming a little bit weary!

EuroShagmore · 13/02/2013 10:48

I told a few close friends. It wasn't exactly a shock as we didn't get married until our mid-30s and in those circs a baby often follows quite quickly. We've been trying for over 2 years and I found it really helpful to have someone to talk to. The only person I have told who has reacted in a disappointing way is my mum - she just seems disinterested.

Jayne266 · 13/02/2013 12:47

I didn't when I was trying as I didn't want that are you pregnant yet hassle. But I asked some advice from friends with children. (think they guessed why)

purplefairies · 13/02/2013 12:53

I told three of my closest friends, but sort of regret it now if I'm being honest. 3 of us came off the pill at the same time so we were all "in it together", of course the other two got pregnant the first month and DH and I are still waiting, 9 months on.

It's just frustrating because every time we meet up now, I can see their eyes shooting to my stomach/boobs for any "signs". Then you get the whole "Aw, we were wondering whether you asked us out to dinner because you had news". All meant very kindly of course, but I feel it does put extra pressure on us. My current strategy is to already be sitting with a big glass of wine whenever we meet up now, so that they know right away.

IrnBruTheNoo · 13/02/2013 13:32

Definitely didn't whilst TTC my DC. I couldn't think of a worse thing to do, really. You cannot predict that things will go well from the off, and it may take you a long time (longer than expected). IME, it's best to never talk about it with anyone, and surprise everyone once you've had your 12 week scan (once you know the baby is well, and is a viable pregnancy).

MortifiedAdams · 13/02/2013 13:34

I didn't tell anyone we were ttc, and not a soul other than dh knew we had a BFP til 11 weeks.

IrnBruTheNoo · 13/02/2013 13:36

With my 1st DC, I told everyone after the 12 week scan. With 2nd DC, I kept it quiet from most people until around 24 weeks. I didn't feel the need to talk about it, tbh. We had a MMC in between both DC, so for me it was a way of the longer I kept it quiet, the less people I would need to tell if something later went wrong. Very cynical, but realistic after suffering a pregnancy loss that same year.

AmelieRose · 13/02/2013 13:38

I didn't initially but when I had a mc told some friends about it and they then knew as a result of that.

Has actually worked in my favour though as now hardly anyone asks me about it - whereas before every so often people would say "are you thinking about TTC?" It saves me telling them it's none of their business Smile

Alexandra6 · 13/02/2013 15:21

Just reading this with interest - I've been ttc for 13 months now, and I'm not usually a blabbermouth at all, quite private, but I started off by talking to family and friends, then neighbours, then a couple of my DH's colleagues wives/girlfriends, then the girl who does my waxing...the list goes on quite a bit Blush I've heard so many stories and am amazed by how many other people have struggled, or know someone with polycystic ovaries (which I have) and tried clomid or IVF, often with success (love those stories). It's kind of become a joke between my DH and I as he says I might as well broadcast it! Maybe what makes it ok with him is because as far as we know, there are no issues with him? I am trying to be less obsessive talk about it a bit less!

setayharas · 14/02/2013 13:01

im a bit like alex fully intended on keeping it quiet but as times gone on everyone knows (except my parents. dont want to get their hopes up)
but litrally everyone else knows. best mate deicded to try aswell as we could have children toegther of corse shes fallen and i havent and constantly advoids the subject now.

makes things easier i think people havent pestered me and respect that in the tww i wont want to be going out drinking etc

gillian1986 · 14/02/2013 15:02

Haven't told anyone although I have told my sister I'm not on the pill anymore so she can make her own conclusions from that! Wink

nomoreminibreaks · 14/02/2013 17:55

I can understand people wanting to keep it private but if you want to tell people, go for it. I'm TTC and a few of my friends and family know, but I'm terrible at keeping my own secrets. I also told quite a few people when I first got pregnant with DS. I don't really know why people disapprove of that, why should telling people be a taboo?

WakeyCakey · 14/02/2013 18:56

It's only DP and I (although I think even he forgets!) an 1 work colleague. She had real trouble with conceiving her DD so knows what I will be going through. Not really for advice just support.
It's nice to know someone knows but won't tell anyone else as she is very private and when she was trying no one at all knew.

If she sees me upset or looking worried (or randomly fondling my boobs whilst symptom spotting) she always has a great anecdote about herself going through the same things.

Would never tell my family though!

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