So utterly utterly fed up of people asking me when I'm going to get pregnant....

[farmersdaugther]

repeatedly asking me isn't going to improve the situation. I'm been trying alright

Same here. Bloody shit isnt it. I get to test in abut 10days, thats if my bastard period doesnt show up.

sodding ipad

anyway as I was saying...

Yes, I know DD is 2!
Yes, I know we should get a move on,
Yes, I know I'm not getting any younger or DH for that matter.

And yes, I am delighted for the 3 friends who just announced that they're pregnant.

But seriously STOP asking

Go AF due on the 24th...

Starting to really lose morale on this whole babymaking path that we are currently on. DH even said the other night, 'you just want me for my sperm' {nods head} Encouragement needed or just a big fat kick up the butt for being self indulgent.

I just told people, either explicitly or less directly ("It doesn't happen instantly for everyone, you know"). It takes the pressure off.

euro i've been saying the same thing. 'Well we're trying' with that look

It seemed to work for me. Or maybe people just got bored of wondering about it after we had been married for a couple of years.

It is enough to drive anyone insane isn't it!

I really don't get why people thinknitvis any of their business.

Of course once you tell people you are having problems, some bright-spark is bound to say "I'm sure if you relax it will happen"

It'll drive you to ABH!

My DH has said something similar! It is really too long TTC when your are looking forward to NOT having to have sex for a while!

My AF is due on 22nd. We shall both have to come back here and update....

Same here and its driving me round the bend.
Recently married and my main source of stress right now is when FIL and MIL constantly ask when we will be having babies and are we going to have a baby soon blah blah...
Actually I just find it rude and totally intrusive. Its none of their business and I just want to turn around and say " ACTUALLY, we may not even WANT children... or we may not be able to even have children... SO PLEASE STOP ASKING!!!"
Some people (as we all know) TTC for years. I cant believe people think its OK to constantly ask when I could be in a world of pain unable to conceive. WHAT DO THEY KNOW?!

You can tell this is something that REALLY pisses me off!

I NEVER ask anyone that question, I remember ages ago I was out for dinner with a close friend who I had recently had a mmc, when another friend jokingly said to her 'when are you going to have children then?'. It was just awful I quickly tried to change the subject on my friend's behalf, but it really hammered home that you don't know what people are going through, say nothing! It took us over three years to have our DD the questions drove me insane, until eventually it took so bloody long I think people got bored of asking or assumed we didn't want any!

I remember being at a BBQ in the Summer and one of my friends wasn't drinking due to being a course of antibiotics. One girl said, is that code for you being pregnant (whist laughing her head off) My friend burst in to tears and went no...it's code for I've just had a horrid miscarriage.

Awkward and really upsetting to say the least.

I very nearly told someone yesterday ' well if you must know we've been having loads of much sex recently, I've given myself a delightful case of cystitis!

I know, the most annoying question ever! Two years down the line, people are still asking. It's so insensitive and I can't believe people don't think before they speak. It's such an intrusive question to ask someone!

Just tell everyone you're not wanting a family, you have other plans with your life. I can guarantee once you've told everyone, that you'll end up up the duff!

2 answers seem to work quite well at shutting people up:

'Can you please stop asking that question.'

Or

'We'll be ready to tell you of any plans if and when we've had the 12 week scan.'

It took my parents over 10 yrs to conceive me. Faced with this insensitive questioning my father used to reply 'well, we're trying all the time. She swallows and everything. I just don't know what's going wrong?' True story. Soon shut them up

Somebody once asked me when DS was 2 'dont you think it is time you had another one then?'

i said 'yes it is - but we have only just had a miscarriage and want to get over that first but thanks for asking'. that shut her up

agreed it is so intrusive, we have been trying for over 2 years now, had 2 CP's one 10w MC and a stillborn boy at 21w. Funnily enough people seem to have stopped asking now

I sometimes answer deadpan "But why would we want a baby? We've already got two adorable cats?" (I'm known for being a bit of a cat lady so some people do pause for a second over that one...)
My side of the family has stopped saying anything, I think my mum has done a good behind the scenes job of shutting them up- my parents took 6 yrs to have me while mum's siblings were popping out babies left right and centre so she knows how it feels.
DH's side is another matter especially his uncle who's very proud of his kids all giving him many grandchildren. Hate his comments even though he's a nice guy really. I don't understand why it doesn't even cross his mind that there could be problems? He wouldn't intentionally upset us. Argh!! Thoughtless people!!

A friend of a friend, on the very first meeting (and I haven't seen her since!) Asked: "Do you have any children? No? Why not? Do you want them? When are you going to have them?"
To which I muttered a non-commital response about thinking about it in a few years time. Some people are rude and insensitive, and it's none of their business!

After a while they get bored, believe me. Most of our family have stopped asking now. However, I'm surrounded by people who all seemed to get upduffed on their first cycle, plus my insensitive cow of a SIL, who has had loads of problems TTC and 3 MMCs but now has a baby, felt it was okay to ask me over the dinner table in front of all our family. It was a few months ago and I'm still seething about it. It's funny how easily some people forget . . .

I'm totally with you. Ds is 3 and we've been trying for 9 months now and I'm panicking about a big age gap and of course people keep saying you'll have to get in with it as ds is getting older and I just have to smile and nod I stead of slapping them! I have told 2 friends now as I was visiting my friend who's just had Ivf twins and she keeps asking when were gonna have another. So ended up telling her and my other friend that we'd been trying.

Always hated this - 6 years of trying - 5 ivf's now moving on to adoption and everyone knows our business due to needing references. Argh!

GO let's start a thread testing on or around the 20th!!

sounds good FarmersDaughter. count me in!

We have been TTC number 2 for 5.5 years and I'm totally fed up with the "when are you having another" comments. I had a MC at 14 weeks which everyone knew about and we were TTC for 10 months before DD arrived and now she is 7 we are getting the "it's mean to with hold a sibling" comments they are coming from people who don't know that since DD we have had 8 more MCs though so I can't even feel too angry but it's like a kick in the arse all the same

My mother has been doing this! You're getting older - you'd better not wait too long etc etc

Little does she know we are TTC and hope to have had a baby by the time we get married next year! That will shut her up lol.

Melissakitkat - sorry to hear of that Ivf wasn't successful but adoption is wonderful. I should know as I'm adopted and giving a child a proper chance in life is the most wonderful thing x