Anyone else feel like their life is totally on hold while TTC?

[polkadottop]

We've been ttc for seven months and have a 2.2 year old dd. Work has become beyond awful due to various factors and it is at the point where I would be leaving normally. I have a three month notice period so there is (hopefully) a reasonable chance that I could be pregnant starting a new job which would look terrible. I just feel totally trapped. ( I'm almost 35 but had no trouble conceiving first time around.)

Yes, just the same as you. I don't really want to shop for clothes because I'm hoping they won't fit me in a few months, but I badly need clothes.
I'm eager to go job hunting to get my career back on track but want to wait until dc2 (not yet conceived) is about 2 or 3.
I want to take up a new sport, but don't in case I sign up for something I won't be able to continue.
This limbo place is annoying!

Thanks. I'm the same with clothes. I keep thinking there is no point in buying much as hopefully I'll be pregnant soon.

Yep but after 19 months and still nothing I have started to carry on with life as normal. I've got a new job and I'm trying to get back into exercise.

I'm the same with clothes too!

I a similar position, currently TTC #2. Took 16 months to get DD, so knew it might take a while, hence started TTCing as soon as my periods started again after I finished breast feeding (DD was 10 months). DD now 2.3, on cycle 15 and pretty fed up. I have bought new clothes and joined gym at the start of the year as I figure I have to start facing the possibility that we might not be able to have another child and I can put the rest of my life on hold indefinitely.

I've only just started TTC, but was thinking about this today... I am desperate for a new job but haven't been sure whether to hang on in case I get a BFP. Or whether to get a new job before TTC. But I've decided to go for both at full throttle. Life is short and things never work out perfectly anyway!

Yes it's not ideal starting a new job and then announcing your pregnant but I've realised that good employers will be happy for you and want you back and the rest can go to hell. You have to look after yourself

And buy some clothes - just get stretchy waistbands.

Thank you for this thread! I've been pondering the work/clothes/gym thing this evening so much that I've had to get out of bed as I can't sleep!
I agree with bookwormery, so am off clothes shopping on Thursday & job hunting tomorrow!
Good luck to you all!

Good luck to you all too :)

Oh I'm with you all on the clothes front! I bought something in a size bigger than I would wear at the weekend in hope it will last me if I'm lucky enough to get pregnant (on cycle 4 of ttc) but its all I think about! This is my first time. I'm fine on the job front but worry about commiting to future projects that are a year down the line in case.

Fingers crossed we all get BFP soon and then it won't matter!

Thanks everyone. You have inspired me to go shopping. If only the job situation could be resolved as easily.

Yes! Have been TTC 6 months and recently been feeling very much like my life is on hold. Took the plunge this week though and booked my wedding for 18 months time. Also going to sort a holiday for this summer. Just figure what will be will be. Although not liking the image of waddling down the aisle carrying a ton of baby weight or worse just about to give birth!

Update!
I've been inspired too! Thanks everyone for saying "just do it".
I've joined the local pool and gym for a year (yikes!) and I've been twice since posting on this thread.
I'm so glad I did.

Yes, definitely - and (the obvious lack of baby aside) that's my biggest issue with it. It's been 9 cycles now and I'm fed up of the clothes issue, of not booking holidays, not feeling able to make plans and so on - even little things like a hot air balloon ride I need to take before the voucher expires - you can only book months in advance. A friend suggested Airkix last month - thankfully I went ahead and booked it anyway as it seems I can go.

And then there's the tiny short term things like planning a Valentine's meal - should I buy alcohol or not?

Then there are the really big things - I want to return to work after this baby which would be our last, but every month that goes past means another month (the other end, if we do ever get a take home baby) with what remains of my career left on hold. I can't go back to work just yet (childcare logistics/finances) so it's not like I could go get a job now and see what happens. I'm already angry I missed the September due date cut off, which means another year lost and an ever widening age gap for this theoretical final child.

At the start I'd be "oh, must have blue cheese, might not be able to have it for a while" but now I just don't care any more and in fact the sight of pregnancy no-nos actually makes me depressed because I CAN have the blasted things.

I have been desperate to go skiing but until recently afraid to book, but last week after another bust cycle I said "sod it" and we booked a ski holiday for the Easter holidays. We're going to try to avoid next cycle, not that I feel it will make any difference to be honest as I suspect something seriously wrong due to my history, and we will try the cycle after (and hey, I worked out I get to POAS at 10,000 feet! Extreme POAS!).

Then all around me are people getting "whoopsies" or getting pregnant first time - the latter are the worst as they get excitedly in touch in the TWW to "share" the stress together with me, then report their BFPs a few days later..

And it's only been 9 cycles.. how people manage this for over a year and/or with no DC at all astounds me. It's already driven me mad!

You can't put your life on hold while TTC.

I've learnt the hard way and am now almost 3 years into my ttc journey

Just remember that 80% of couples can take up to 1 year to conceive, and 90% will conceive within 2 years. Unfortunately I'm stuck in the other 10%!