Five and the Mystery of the Declining Fertility - the BESH engage the services of the Famous Five to track down their baybees and finish with lashings of ginger beer. Topping!

[ArielThePiraticalMermaid]

Morning everyone, just let me wolf down this amazing meal of tinned tongue, hardboiled eggs and ginger beer (don't you find food always tastes so much better outside?) and we'll toddle off on our latest adventure. We'll make sure Anne does the washing up (you'll make a proper little housewife and no doubt the fecund mother of four fine sons one day Anne ) and us boys can have the proper adventures! No, not you George - you're nearly as good as a boy but not quite. Leave the actual procreating to me and Dick. Woof woof! Shut up Timmy!

Oh bugs PURRRLEAASE do it. Norf might defriend you for life but we'll love you forever! And yes, it is possible, I do alternating sides with about 3 days in between too. Left is quicker.

DO IT!

Rie's right (as usual). I usually lay on day 14 from my right side and day 16 from my left.

Norf will love it

I am proud to announce that I have met bugsy, and can report that she is beautiful, kind, funny and scary. I'm not sure in what order.

And she kindly overlooked the fact that I had a hole in my trousers.

And the babydust?

Not so much as a sprinkle. Bitch.

Rie! Language!

Glad to hear that Winkly.

My old man is still in, but they say he has made some improvements over the last couple of days. His low point was the first two days I saw him

Glad everyone's relatives are doing better.

Very jealous of the BESH mini-meet-up. We need to arrange a proper one at some point.

Well why not, eh?

I had a good gym workout this evening. The hardest part for me is always getting through the door. Once I'm there, I enjoy it.

OMG! Would you look at the snow in Somerset!!!

I hear it's pretty heavy in Gloucestershire too - Cheltenham are due to race on Saturday but it's looking unlikely now. Yes my life is generally summed up in terms of racing

I WANT SNOW IT'S SO UNFAIR

Yes I had snow earlier in the week. But I was visiting.

We haff snow. Not currently chucking it down but probably about 5-6 inches in total since last week. Tis a PITA. No snow days when you look after sick people.

Glad the mini meet went well, a lickle bit

Delighted the sick rents/in laws are on the mend. Enjoy the shower winkers.

Well I wouldn't say he was on the mend. He will still be in hospital having loads of tests and nursing for ages. But at least he isn't like a little old man in a care home for the moment. FFS, he's only 69.

Despite my determination to take advantage of my hotel pool and sauna, I am in fact up and working in my room. This is not glamorous.

I would also quite like a proper meet, please. Or even some more mini ones. I am feeling unusually sociable at the moment. It won't last.

I'm so pleased the riefather and winks' MIL are improving. Fingers crossed for a nice smooth progress from now on. And parents are BANNED from ever looking like little old people in homes. It is too distressing and heart-wrenching. They are NOT ALLOWED.

A besh meet up would be nice, but I suspect I would be too chicken to go.

Glad to hear the extended besh family are a little better/not getting poorlier.

I'n v impressed with norfs dedication to work. I'm at work, but sulking because, again, I've hit a fecking piller in the car park. Why mark a space then stick a fecking lump of concrete in it? (this argument would be better if I hadn't done this several times).

I might need a coffee. (given am off the ttc bandwagon)

Some people should not procreate

Today I an filled with hatred for anyone who can conceive naturally. Sorry, but that's just the way it is. Any lurkers who are offended by that can fuck off.