Trying to be a mum

[Secrethair]

Hello. Im so frustrated.
I want to be a mother so bad. The back story is this: married for 5 years to first husband. Discovered i had crohns disease and was told having children may be out. As much as this info was wrong my then husband could not accept this and we split. I was devastated but resolved that i would one day adopt.
Now with new husband of 3 years and now know that pregnancy is possible but still no baby. All in all ive been classed as not preventing pregnancy for 13 years and had all the tests available and nothing seems to be wrong.
It has become a sore subject with my new husband. He classes adoption as the last option and wants to go for fertility treatment but i am scared to get fiddled with more than i already have been. Fertility wise and crohns wise.
I just feel so alone and that its all on me.

You're not alone-I'm with you on this. I had problems conceiving and then got pregnant and lost the baby at 14 weeks. Time is not on my side and my partner won't adopt.
I just wanted to give you a bit of a hand squeeze.

Thank you. I think we may be at the end now. Its a constant argument with tears and sadness. We have talked seperation.
I cant believe it has come to this.

OP I am so sorry. I don't have much advice really but wanted to give you a ((hug)) and here's one for teaandabiscuit too ((hug))

After many years of TTC and 7 rounds of clomid, I fell pg on my second round of IVF and now have a wonderful DD. FWIW, the fertility tests and IVF weren't really all that bad; obviously they weren't great but it wasn't as bad as I was anticipating.

I know it can put a real strain on your relationship - I don't think you are alone with that one. DH and I were hardly speaking to each other by the time I got a BFP ... fortunately we are doing better now!

Please don't feel alone though - we are all here to hold your hand and chat whenever you need to.

Whatever you decide, I wish you lots of luck with it.

Thanks Ginshizz. Thats warming to know.
We are doing better after confronting the actual problems underneath our outbursts which is fear.
I suppose we have to work on us as well as the baby and keep our fingers crossed.
We met with the adoption people today but to be honest with you I found myself having issues with some of the process.

Also TeaAndABiscuit, Im really sorry I wasnt very supportive the other day. After I had put down the laptop I thought about what you had wrote and Im so sorry for your loss. It is heartbreaking and I cant imagine the pain of what you are going through. I hope that you find a resolution that suits you both.
Friend here if you need.