Very personal question (Name changed for this)

[nearlypregnant]

Hi,there is no delicate way to put this, so here goes. When we have sex, my DH's sperm never stays in me. It just comes streight back out when he withdraws. We've tried different positions and usually lay with my legs up afterwards, but most of it has come out by then. I do have a tilted woumb, would this cause it?
We've been trying for another baby for many years now and we're thinking of IVF. Would using a syringe and squirting it in when I'm ready with my legs up help? That way, there'd be less chance of it comming streight back out.
I know this is all very grose and FTMI, but I'm getting desperate. I'd be really greatful for any advice or tips. Thanks in advance.

I am pretty sure that's normal....when you're fertile, your cervix is open. There will be rapid swimmers that shoot straight up through the hole, those that fall out are generally the duffers that you wouldn't want getting you pregnant anyway! Fwiw, I have a tilted uterus and didn't even know until my 12 week scan. We had male factor fertility issues and lots of investigations and no-one ever raised the tilted uterus as a cause for concern.

Have you had fertility investigations?

I'm no expert, nearly, but I think it doesn't matter too much if some comes out. I think the main aim is to get some up and swimming in there - it only takes one after all. I read somewhere that if you have fertile cervical fluid then it will allow the swimmers to get up there more easily. I think some of it will still be in there, even if some comes out. You can have a post-coital test done where they take a swab from inside a few hours after sex to see whether the sperm is a) there still, b) alive, c) that your cervical fluid is conducive to the sperm staying alive. Maybe you could ask at the doctors for one of these? If you've been trying for a baby for years, maybe it's time to visit the docs and get soem investigations done. Hope this helps. x

Thank you both. we've had a lot of investigation, and since I'm ovulating regularly and my tubes are o.k and DH is fine, the only option is IVF. Or ART. I'm not sure which to go for at the moment.

This might also be TMI, but if you climax just after your DH (before he withdraws), then the muscle contractions cause your cervix to dip into the ejaculate a few times.

My friend asked me this question when she had been trying to convieve second baby for two years. For a joke I told her she needed to stand on her head after sex for five minutes. The joke is she is very grateful because it worked.

Three, I can try, but might be hard to time. That's really funny nutty. Not sure I could manage that for 5 mins though.

That just gives you a fair crack at the timing. To be fair, when I did get pregnant (after a long time TTC) I reckon (based on scan dates) I got pregnant CD6! So start dtd as soon as AF has gone. Also I didn't stand on my head etc :) but I did have a good time iykwim I do think that helps!

Cd6?! How do you know that?

Hopefully you're reassured by the responses on here. There's no point to all that legs up/head standing stuff as the sperm that you want up there will get up there regardless. It's right and proper that the duffers fall out and you don't want to encourage them back up, plus post sex you should be off for a wee quite soon afterwards, not keeping the swimmers in with a bung and an upside down position.

I fell pg on cd8 and cd 11 respectively btw.

It's normal it's where the 'wet patch' comments come from.
As for climaxing, yes it works like shaking a bottle of ketchup!

How do you know what cycle day you conceived?

From the scan dates twinkle and keeping a record of when we dtd. You can work backwards from your scan dates. Basically I was about 4 days further on than I thought based on my scan results - I thought I was 13+3 but the scan showed I was 14+0 so I conceived a few days earlier than I thought. Your initial due date calculator will base your due date on your average length cycle and approximate when you ovulated at about half that - I had av. 27 day cycles but often ovulated around CD10/11 (I charted). Based on when we had sex and when they think I conceived, it was most likely cd6!

Ah I see. Did you realise at the time that you'd ov'd on cd6? We're you using opks or did your chart confirm that?

No ironically I'd ditched it all that month! We were about to go on the waiting list for IVF!

I was a bit because I didn't see any ewcm til CD12. According to my scan I got pregnant on CD11 so it was either from DTD CD6 or possibly 11. Either way, early on in my cycle!

Ah so you mean you had sex on cd6 but you ov'd on cd11

Well I conceived on CD11....which is why I suspect that I ov'd just before that and it was the sex on CD6 that got me pregnant!

I see I see! Thanks for clarification! After 18 months I know everything about TTC but not so much about the actual conception :(

I used to put 3 pillows under my bottom (better sex anyway) and lie with my legs almost over my head, it worked twice, my tubes are blocked, either that or the Doctor done something when I was under anesthetic, lied, and the 2nd was a fluke.

try it!

I realised when I got pregnant I knew very little about being pregnant! :)

I'm not an expert at all but remember reading an article about Dr Joshi's PH balancing diet a few years ago. Might be worth a look?

www.joshiclinic.co.uk/shop/books.htm

I'm not one for fad diets but maybe it makes some sense?!

I know I ov'd on the days I ov'd on because I know when I ovulate. I can feel it, from the build up to the release. My body's like clockwork. I also have a headache on the day I ovulate and I get hiccups. I NEVER hiccup at any other time.

When I conceived dd we'd had sex the day before ovulation and with ds on the day of ovulation.