Ovulation calculations..... help please.....

[mamalovebird]

TTC no.2 and as DS was a happy accident I'm still a bit confused about working out my cycle.

Using the ovulation calculator on here it says to use the first date of your period. Yes fine I get that BUT, I normally spot for a few days then BAM it comes like a river and is gone in a few days.

My question is..... do I use the day when I start spotting as the first day of my period or do I use the date when it it gets really heavy (normally around 2-3 days after I start spotting?

I'm worried I'm using the wrong dates and missing my window of opportunity as we've been ttc for 9 months now and still nothing :(

I'm considering using Ovulation sticks this month - worth it or not?

You ovulate 14 days before your period pretty much regardless of length of cycle. If you have sex 14 days before you spot then if you're a bit early the sperm can still hang around.

Count the first day of spotting

So, I should use the day I start spotting as the official start of my period?

That's what I'm trying to determine. I've been using the date when it comes in full flow but that's about 2-3 days after the spotting so I've been using the wrong dates :(

bounceysmiley x-post
Okay, got it! God, I'm 35 and have a responsible job but this baby making malarkey is hard to crack!

Different places seem to have a different idea as to what constitutes the first day of your period. Fertility Friends says first day of "red flow" and to ignore spotting. If your spotting is regular (eg always 2 days of it) then I doubt it matters.

Ovulation 14 days before your period is an average. You may ovulate earlier or later than this, and it's also a myth that women ovulate at the same time every month. The luteal phase can vary - normally just by a day or so either way, but illness and various other things can delay ovulation.

Unfortunately it's an inexact science, so shagging every couple of days, maybe more around when you think you ovulate is the only way to guarantee a sperm-meets-egg opportunity.

Thanks sleepyhead We started doing the every-two-days then every day when I thought was the window, last month but before that I was working around the golden 48 hours, but was probably using the wrong dates.

Think we'll stick with the current tactic of every few days and keep our fingers crossed. Just getting a bit frustrated and upset with it all, I'll try anything. Really want another child :(

This will not happen to you I'm sure but it took us 3.5 years to conceive no.2 (I was a bit older than you when we started though.)

It was very frustrating and I'd basically given up when the bfp finally arrived. Having said that:

• I would estimate that within those 3.5 years there was only a likelihood of sperm-meets-egg about half the time (lots of stuff going on that cut down the amount of sex we were having)
• I think that when we were trying to time it properly we were giving up too quickly and I was ovulating much later than I thought
• We didn't seek medical help (due to lots of complicated personal stuff going on).

At 35 I would recommend you think about seeing a doctor fairly soon. Not because there's likely anything wrong (9 months feels long but not really), but just because it's good to get some info on whether things might be working as they should. We should have done that, but didn't - was a bit foolish really.

I found temping quite handy for getting an idea about my cycle, but it's been about 2 years since I did it so it didn't have any effect in achieving the eventual bfp. I personally found ovulation predictor strips completely useless.

Spotting between periods should always be investigated further to ascertain the underlying cause. It is often not serious but it should be checked out all the same.

Day 1 of your period is normally counted as full flow red.

Ovulation is not an exact science and a woman can ovulate earlier, later or not at all in any given cycle.

I would seek medical advice sooner rather than later particularly if you are over 35 years of age.

Try reading www.tcoyf.com/ We found it really useful.

Thanks everyone. I have said to Dh that if nothing happens by xmas then it's off to the doctor we go. I don't want to try and try and try - i cant handle the crushing disappointment month after month.

I agree count from full flow - its not day 1 if that starts after 3pm according to a lot of clinics - you'd count from the next day. I didn't get on with cheap ovulation tests but liked the clearblue smiley ones. Not cheap but very clear! After some time of TTC though, I didn't need them. I could tell from my body signs when I was gearing up to ovulate. Timing wise though I agree it's best to aim for 3 times a week, every week of your cycle though.

Oh and statistically 80% of couples will conceive within a year, 90% within 18 months so I know it's tough (I really do, we were in the last 10%) but try not to panic yet.

Hey, it took me 6 years to get my BFP, and that was with IVF. In my earlier tests at the hospital to determine the problem my consultant quoted 'to be considered actively trying for a baby, you need to be having sex 3 times a week EVERY week'