Am I being selfish wanting a 3rd???

[Linnielou5]

Hiya!! Needing a wee bit of advice, me and my hubby have always said we would have 3 kids, have 2 already nearly 3 and nearly 5. In the past couple of years my husband has developed some health problems which effect his mobility and can also make him tired or sore at times but otherwise lives a fairly normal life, I work 5 mornings and he takes kids to school/nursery, he has his own small business working from home. We spoke about having another one and he says he does but I think he's worried that it'll be a struggle for him when I have to return to work although he's never actually said this, I would put the baby in nursery a few times a week too, I also think he's just going along with it because he knows how much I would like another child. We are planning on ttc in the next couple of months, in my heart I know it's what I want and every time I ask him he always says he does and it would be nice to have a baby again and I'm also worried what people might think knowing that my husbands health isn't what it used to be. So should we just go for it and if it happens it happens then it's meant to be??? Any advice?? Thanks.xx

I'm also worried what people might think knowing that my husbands health isn't what it used to be

First point, it's nobody else's business but yours and your husband's, so ignore this whatever you decide to do.

As for your husband, from what you've said, he seems happy to try for a third, or do you have the impression that he is only saying this to keep you happy?

The main point for me here would be how severe are his health problems likely to become, ie is it more likely that his mobility will be further reduced or is it expected to stay at the current level. In other words, at some stage would you have to face the fact that he could not look after the children when you were at work? Not saying that this would mean you shouldn't have a third child but it seems the only factor to consider out of everything you've said.

Have you asked him outright if he feels he'll be able to manage with 3 children? I would say that seems to be a conversation you need to have before you ttc and as for what other people think, who gives a monkeys?! Good luck