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Am I too fat to have another baby?

13 replies

puddinggal · 20/12/2003 23:12

This is a situation that I have been very upset about.

Put on a lot of weight during pregnancy number 1. Have been battling to try and loose the weight - but to no success. I am now about 17.5 - 18 stone.

My ds is about 16 months old and within the next 6 months would love to have another one.

My question is - am I too overweight to carry a baby? Will I be putting my (and the baby) health at risk getting pregnant?

Am too embarrased to talk to any one about this - but I cry most days about this. Please let e know your opinions. Thanks x

OP posts:

Chinchillyweather · 20/12/2003 23:20

I know someone who had a baby whilst being a very large lady. I do know that doctors do not recommend it though. Sorry you are so unhappy with your size.

I hesitate to ask this but wouldn't you be better off losing some of the weight before putting yourself through another pregnancy? You say that you have tried, but can I ask what diet you followed? At your weight, you would be able to eat around 1900 calories a day and still lose weight. As you got closer to target, you could drop it gradually to 1500, and continue at that level. You do not need to feel hungry to be on a diet. Pad out meals with salads and vegetables, and make 'free-vegetable' soups (all veg except potatoes on my diet) to add to lunches or have as snacks between meals.

Honestly, unless you have a thyroid or other medical problem, there would be no reason why you can not lose weight. I really wish you all the luck in the world. I am hoping that once I reach target, my dh will not be able to resist giving me another baby IYKWIM

I hope that I have not upset you, as I really did not mean to.


Skara · 20/12/2003 23:26

Hi puddinggal, no you are not :-) Go to plus size pregnancy for lots and lots of info. If being a bit (or a lot) overweight was a problem, half the population of the USA wouldn't be having babies! I say this as a person who by NHS standards wouldn't be entitled to a water birth as if you weigh more than 13 stone at term you're considered a risk. Considering I weigh more than that when not pregnant, that's blooming ridiculous - I'm fit, healthy and besides which I'm 5'9", something which our NHS trust doesn't take into consideration. But that's another rant for another time. Don't be sad (((hugs))) go read that website and get baby making!


bunny2 · 21/12/2003 09:18

Puddinggal, I havent been able to lose all the weight I put on during my pregnancy, I am only about 1.5 stone overweight but it could be enough to affect my fertility. Since then I have had problems getting pregnant again (unfortunately I have got pg twice since but have miscarried) and have been prescribed with fertility drugs. The closer you are to an ideal weight. the easier conception should be but I find it impossible to shift the extra 20 lbs. My consultant is testing me for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) which is linked to infertility and to weight gain . With PCOS it is very difficult to lose weight but there is a medication and special diet to follow if you are diagnosed. I too have tried lots of diets, I gained weight following Slimming World! Do you think your problem might be PCOS?


jac34 · 21/12/2003 10:59

Ni Puddinggal,
I'm no skinny woman myself, but I have a friend who I think, proberbly weighs far more than you. She had trouble getting pg, but the problems were not related to her size. However, after many attempts at IVF she now has a lovely 18 month old DD, who is the apple of her parents eye. She had a very healthy and active pregnancy, and a natural birth.
So stop wishing and get making !!!!


Rae1973 · 21/12/2003 12:11

Hiya, I don't think you are too big, I was 22 stone when i fell pregnant.


BeckiF · 03/01/2004 16:11

A very good friend of mine who is a BIG girl (size 28 and only 5' 4" successfully conceived twins naturally and delivered naturally! It's horses for courses I guess. What is true for one person isn't necessarily true for another.... guess that's why we are all made different! Don't worry about it, concentrate on your general welfare and fitnesss, adopt a new eating plan (the reuslts could be a much wanted baby afterall) and everything will all in place! Good luck!


Chinchilla · 03/01/2004 16:19

Having said that, it is not just a case of whether you CAN fall pg. What about the strain on ones body carrying ANOTHER 2 stone at full term? It is important IMO to be as healthy as possible when pg. I was not when I had ds. Although I was only 1 stone overweight when I fell pg, I had a hell of a time with my back in the last 6 weeks, as my body was so unfit.


BeckiF · 04/01/2004 17:37

Oh I agree entirely on the health issue, is all I am saying is it isn't impossible to get pregnant when you are big. PLUS it has been proven over and over again that just becuase you are larger than the norm you can also be very fit. There are those of us (PCOS sufferers etc) who find it extremely difficult to lose the weight, not because we are lazy, don't want to or aren't trying, but becuase our bodies fight us ALL the way!


bunny2 · 04/01/2004 17:42

BekkiF, have you looked into low gi diets? I am convinced I have PCOS and have been surfing. Seems that low carb diets are the thing (or low gi diets, must admit I am a bit confused). Have you been given advice from your gp?


BeckiF · 04/01/2004 19:16

AHhhhhh yes the low card (Atkins diet) does work wonders for me and it's the way I plan to go now that the festive period is over and I'm back to work! There are those that say it doesn't work, or it is bad for you, but I disagree. I lost 3 stones on that diet and kept it off for well over 6 months (til I sadly got viral meningistis!) SO it does work, and in fact my gynae doc at the hospital suggested I carry on with it as well as the new dose of Metformin ... here I go ..... AGAIN!!!


bluecow · 06/01/2004 12:38

No you're not. Please don't cry about it. We all know how hard losing weight is but there are plenty of larger women having babies (me included). I have PCOS and yes it's majorly hard to lose weight with it. Only exercise really works for me when I can bothered! And I was big and fit!
Wishing you lots of luck, PG.

PS - Skara - didn't know that bit about waterbirths. During my last pregnancy I wasn't weighed though I was at the beginning of this one.


M2T · 06/01/2004 13:36

puddinggal - You are NOT too fat to have another baby!! I know plenty of overweight women who have had healthier pregnancies than mine and I was about 10stone when I got pg with ds.

Don't depress yourself about it. If you want another baby then you go for it!

IF you experience problems conceiving then cross that bridge when you come to it. I can see far worse health issues associated with being pregnant than being overweight.

I am about 2 stone overweight and 10 wks pregnant at the moment and apart from being majorly peeved with my figure the only thing that bothers me this time is that my bump will be hidden under flab for longer than last time!

Good luck!


prettycandles · 06/01/2004 14:30

Puddingal, I became pg when about 50% heavier than I 'should' have been, had problem-free pregnancies (apart from SPD 2nd time around) and was allowed a water-birth on the NHS (although I have never actually made it into the pool). But the second time around I was actually half a stone lighter than my first pre-pregnancy weight, and it made me feel much much better about myself.

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