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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

ttc and planning a wedding

28 replies

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 15:53

hi im getting married 25th may 2013. i have mc'd twice this year and am keen to have a successful pregnancy as soon as poss.
but im not sure how much being a preg bride bothers me.
obvs i want to make sure my due date isnt too close to the wedding dont want to risk dropping on my wedding day!
but would it matter if i was heavily preg? because of looking a fatty in my dress or even just a little as that would mean no champagne for me!
but also putting off ttc for that long isnt something i feel i want to do. we were luckily in that ive gotten preg quickly both times so i have to consider that i may get preg the first month we try!!!

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JodieHarshHasALumpyPennie · 11/07/2012 15:55

I'd just relax and take it all as it comes, if I were you. Ultimately a wedding isn't about how you look in a frock, it's about a lifelong commitment and the start of a new life together. If you were also visibly showing a new life that the two of you have created - well, so much the better!

Also pregnant women can look absolutely gorgeous, you know!

WHy can't you have a glass of champagne, anyway?

JodieHarshHasALumpyPennie · 11/07/2012 15:55

Oh and congratulations :)

Original poster

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 16:05

i guess im just so worried about doing anything that will cause another miscarriage i wouldnt want to risk even a drop of alcohol. especially if its early on.
i do tend to over think things a lot.
like i was panicing over how last min they could make adjustments to the dress if i have a growing bump. ive already choosen my dress its due in the shop sometime in the next couple of months

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JodieHarshHasALumpyPennie · 11/07/2012 16:08

MCs must make you even more anxious, I am sorry

But try not to worry too much - as I'm sure you know, MCs are very rarely to do with anything you might have done.

I'm sure you chose a dress that will fit over a bump and can be adjusted. Try to just enjoy it all, if possible!

Original poster

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 16:11

argh deep breath! thanks i know i should calm down. just see what happens and your rite about it being quite lovely from the new life we've made point of view.

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Original poster

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 20:56

Bump

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Pipbin · 11/07/2012 21:03

I agree with Jodie. So many people seem to lose sight of the fact that being married is about so much more than one day.
I've been happily married for 10 years now and our wedding cost £1000 for everything, including the honeymoon.
You will spend a short time getting married and a long time being married.
Get on with TTCing and don't worry about the wedding.

Original poster

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 21:09

I know its only one day, and its about spending the rest of your lives together and being pregnant would make it a bigger celebration. But its the only wedding day I'm planning on having and Iwant it to be prefect. I never imagined myself being a pregnant bride. After all our troubles thou actually having a bump would be amazing.

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NicolaHazel · 11/07/2012 21:14

I get married 3 months Friday and I'm TTC as I didn't want to wait any longer due to getting to that not-so-magic age of 35 (I'll be a few weeks off 36 by the wedding). I don't care if I'm pregnant then, as I want kids as much as I want to be married.

Original poster

cartoonface · 11/07/2012 21:18

Oh yeh me too and even thou i don't sound like it if I had to chose it would be kids over a wedding. I'm worried about other peoples opinions too but I don't know why because its are friends and family so they'd all be happy

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NicolaHazel · 11/07/2012 21:20

The whole invite / RSVP process means I now don't give a monkey's who thinks what or why! :-) It's actually strangely liberating!

keepitgoing · 11/07/2012 21:59

face not that it matters, but noones going to think its a shotgun wedding, ie only getting married because you're pg.

Apoundinatin · 12/07/2012 22:00

Hey cartoon, I totally understand your worries. I'm getting married in Sept and have been TTCing for the last year or so. I didn't mind being a pregnant bride, but I've had 3 mcs, and the worst thing in the world would be to start bleeding on my wedding day. I decided that I wanted to be at least 4 months or not at all. So we tried up until last month without success, and now we are having a four month break. I only sorted my dress last week!

Original poster

cartoonface · 12/07/2012 22:21

God yes that would be awful! I think actually that four/five months would be lovely as prob be showing a little bit and by then will hopefully have relaxed a bit. I know ill be very nervous in any preg I have now. Good luck pound and hope u have a lovely wedding day!

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blondebaby111 · 13/07/2012 18:45

i know your predicament very well!!! i've been with my man a long time and we didn't start planning a wedding a few years back due to family problems..now they are sorted but we are quite far in to trying for a family...so much so that i've put plans on hold. We are now waiting for i.v.f . i'm so tired of people asking have u set a date thats its getting boring! in my view i love my fella and we can get married anytime but i don't have forever to have a baby so that is more important to me at this time. my biggest fear is getting married while pregnant and feeling so ill on the day you can't enjoy it (not everyones pregnancy runs ill free). Having said that you can't put your whole life on hold either! Good luck whatever you decide and i understand totally :)

Original poster

cartoonface · 30/08/2012 16:12

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BeauticianNotMagician · 30/08/2012 16:39

I'm planning a August 2014 wedding and we are ttc now.Fx i will have a baby by then but you never know. We were going to hold off ttc until after our Wedding. But you never know if and when a pregnancy is going to happen and i will be almost 34 when we marry. So ill either be a pregnant bride or a mum for the third time(i have ds's) when we get married.Either way i don't mind as long as we are all happy thats all that matters.

Good luck ttc and no matter what you will have a fab Wedding

Original poster

cartoonface · 30/08/2012 16:51

good luck to u too. its impossible to predict isnt it maybe i will just start ttc in oct and then its up to fate!

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NickiNockiNoodle · 30/08/2012 17:19

I started TTC at the end of May. I get married in 6 weeks and no joy as yet. :-/ I'm glad I didn't wait until I was married.

I'm almost 36 though, with 17.5 years of hormonal birth control behind me!

PuppyMummy · 30/08/2012 18:48

I'm engaged and we have decided to ttc rather than plan the wedding.

(have been together 10yrs so no rush)

however as were now on cycle 6 we have decided to continue til Jan, if not pregnant then we will stop and plan the wedding for Aug and start trying again around may so I would only be 4 months if it happened straight away .

Original poster

cartoonface · 31/08/2012 13:03

wow 10yrs! i like your way of thinking and it was pretty much wot i had planned. i mc'd in march and we pretty much booked the wedding straight away i knew we could ttc up till julyish and then id have to have at least a couple of months break to fit in with the wedding. but having had another mc is making me more anxicous and impatient to get pregnant again. so even waiting until dec/jan so id be only 4/5months seems like a life time away. although i do think that is more ideal, a lot easier to deal with dress wise etc.
i am like the most indecision person as well as very impatient!

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DulcetMoans · 04/09/2012 14:55

I found you here as well cartoonface and you found some of these lovely ladies are from TTC threads!

I think reading the above has helped me decide, I don't want to put it off for the wedding. I will pause for a couple of months so as not to pop on the day but then go for it. If I am a pregnant bride then so be it, as mentioned above, being together is the important thing and it could be a lovely celebration of both things, with baby or bump, for friends and family.

I haven't managed to concieve in the last four months so nothing to say I will if I carry on. Don't want to keep putting it off!

Original poster

cartoonface · 04/09/2012 15:40

haha yup i get around!
its so hard to predict, good luck. let me know how ur doing from time to time, look forward to ur pregnancy announcement dulcet!

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crazyhead · 07/09/2012 11:39

I got together with my OH when I was 33. We got engaged while I was pregnant with DS aged 34, are now trying to buy a house whilst on maternity leave, and I will definitely try to get pregnant with number 2 (once I've just turned 36) whilst fitting in a wedding (I'd say shotgun, but the bullet's very much been fired...)

I personally feel that if you know you're with the right man, and you're in your overripe late 30s, it is best to ignore the traditional order and just get on with it. You can marry when you are 80, but you can't have babies then, so your life to-do list should be topped by the time-limited stuff

Different if you are religious, but for a heathen like me who cares if the wedding pics are of me walking down the aisle with bump - as long as I don't have cigarette smoke coming out of my nostrils too... ;)

Original poster

cartoonface · 07/09/2012 11:46

haha crazyhead you are so rite.
is it bad that ive been trying to work out what my due dates would be! i dont want to put it off for too long but i also dont want to have to leave my own wedding reception to go and give birth! haha

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