Over 35, overweight and ttc#1 for over a year? Please tell me I'm not alone.

[Pipbin]

It's another failed month for me here and I'm starting to think I'm the only oldie ttc #1 that there is.
Anyone else to keep me company?

Sending you ((((hugs)))). I'm almost certain that you are not alone but I'm sure that doesn't really help with your feelings right now. It's always dreadful when AF turns up and then you recover a sense of determination I find. Have you had any help/tests or do you have a plan B?

There are two "quiche" threads on here with lots of people in the same boat - the BESH thread (which has a fairly irreverent take on ttc) and the 10 months + thread (which is a supportive thread). Most of the people on those threads are 30+ and have been trying for blooming ages.

You are by no means alone. I'm 36 and have been ttc#1 for ages - just waiting for AF to arrive and confirm that cycle 18 is over and I am on to cycle 19. I'm not in the chirpirest mood today but just wanted to pop on to this thread to let you know you are not alone by any means. TTC long term is bloody miserable. I don't know what I would have done without the support these boards offer.

Thanks Euro. So many people I know in real life get pregnant at the drop of a hat.

Clicking. I'm off to the GP to be weighed next week. I need to lose about 6 pounds to be under 30bmi and therefore eligible to be referred.
Both of us have been checked. I'm ok it would seem but DH has more than enough chaps but not many heading the right way.

Pipbin - you could try a diet/lifestyle approach with your DH, if you haven't already. Booze/smoking/lack of exercise is often the culprit for confused wrigglers, or a diet that is heavy in sugar or refined carbohydrates. Worth a try while you wait for a referral. He should be taking manvits if he isn't already. My DP has poor motility and low volume probs too. We are trying acupuncture too, though some might not agree it's worth the money. My DP has given up booze apart from the very occasional tipple. And we do organic food with lots of meat and veg and a lot less starch. It takes 90 days to develop new sperm so you need some patience. We have just retested after 3 months on the new lifestyle so who knows if it has helped. AF is due this weekend....

Good luck with the weight loss.

Try the regular threads Euro mentioned. It does help I think and often the conversation turns away from TTC and is a larf, which is a relief!

btw - I got pg with same partner at 'the drop of a hat' 3 years ago, so there's no telling what life has in store. That's the bugger of the conception/fertility game - it plays nasty tricks on some people and it's just rotten luck. Keep going and you will get there in the end.

Pipbin IRL I have a mix of friends who get PG very easily and then it seems an above average number who have had problems. Not much in the middle.

BTW, the long cliquey threads can take a while to get into because everyone knows one another well, but I think they are worth it. The 10+ months thread started as a 5+ months one last summer (?) and has been going since then with various new additions and losses (success stories or people who got bored of us!) along the way.

Clicking we are both vegetarians who don't smoke, rarely drink, run frequently. (we are not as dull or as virtuous as we sound I promise) (and quite how I've managed to get fat I'm not sure either)
I've got DH to take a zinc supplement as often that can be low in a vegi lifestyle and he has been vegi for about 15 years.
I've been doing Weight Watchers for a while now and have already lost 1 stone.
He has plenty of chaps, in fact twice as many as required, but only half of them are going in the right direction.

Hello, you're definitely not alone and I have trodden your path. 2 post 35 and I'm overweight and had ahem, somewhat of a "misspent" youth. Took 361 days to conceive the first and less for the second.

I tortured myself about my weight even though my hormones and cycles were always bang on, I suspect I was his swimmers! ;)

Thanks Alpine. It just seems that everyone here is young fit and healthy.

Pipbin There are plenty of young fit and healthy people experiencing infertility. I'm afraid there are no hard and fast rules to conceiving - if only there were - and you're experiencing a lot of bad luck, you poor thing. You have already done really well to loose weight and I hope this gives you some confidence. You will get there but you have to be tough about it all. Good luck.

I am old, fit and healthy and struggling to conceive DC2... but didn't struggle at all at 37 with my DS - conceived second month of moving in together with DP. You never can tell what's going to happen. Take heart and keep going. xxx