Is there any point in me seeing the GP? Not ovulating.

[Anypointinseeingdoc]

I will be 40 in December and I have 2 DCs already. I have been TTC for 6 months, and I started charting last month. The chart seems to suggest I am not ovulating. I had 5 days of EWCM, starting on day 10, but my temp didn't go up until day 21, and it only stayed up for 5 days. I didn't bother charting before because I always have EWCM and I thought it would be ok. But my periods have become irregular, varying from 24 days to 29 days. They used to always be 27 days.

I did a pregnancy test first thing on Sunday morning and I got a very faint positive I did a repeat test on Monday and it was negative, then my period arrived during the night. I don't know what that was about. It was clear from my chart that I wasn't pregnant so I don't know why I bothered with the test. I bought a big batch of cheap tests when I bought the thermometer, so I suppose I was just tempted to test when I wouldn't normally.

Given my age, the fact that I already have children and also that I am a bit overweight, is there any point in me going to my GP? They're not going to do anything are they? I am feeling very down about all this and I don't want to go there to be sent home with a flea in my ear.

I know I am enormously lucky to be in the position I am in, it's just that we always intended to have 3. I don't know how people do this long term. I was sticking my head in the sand before I started charting, but when I started charting it was clear it wasn't going to happend and I find myself on the verge of tears all the time.

Hi, I'm afraid I dont have advice re the GP as I don't live in the UK, I hear the response really varies for doctor to doctor (I'm sure someone will come along with a more informed post). I feel for you and understand what you are going through. I'm the same age and thinking I should get some repeat tests done (mine are fine but dated) but can't face going to see a doctor (at my age and in the middle east at that - girls half my age have IVF here). I'm on my third month of charting (thankfully mine looks good, not that that seems to help!). In your shoes if there is a chance you could get some help I would try and brave it. You have a good clear reason and need. I wish you the best.

I think that they would be happy to do blood tests for you to see if you are ovulating or not - they can show if you are getting into menopause or not.

Whether or not other tests or treatments would be appropriate may considered later though.

I would ask Better to know either way.

Thanks for your replies. I tried to make an appointment today but they had all gone. DH has a day off so he could have come with me and then I think I wouldn't have been fobbed off so easily, but he can't come any other day. I think I will try again tomorrow.

Does age at menarche affect age at menopause, does anyone know? I started my periods at 10. My mum didn't go through the menopause until she was in her 50s, I think. So obviously if the irregular periods continue I will have to go along and get checked for that anyway.

I should add, the faint positive test, I'm sure that must have been because I did the test wrong, because I am so sure I didn't ovulate. I was walking along yesterday and I had sore boobs and I was so sure I was pregnant, and I never get sore boobs before my period, and here I am. I think I have just become obsessed with it and noticing things I wouldn't normally.

I don't know about menarche to menopause age, interesting question. What I would say is I don't find your periods to be very irregular, perhaps compared to what you are used to, but things do change and many women of all ages have really irregular periods, of course. Focus on the ovulation info you have collected, I think. Good luck again.

Thanks. Yes, I've got my paper chart to take in with me, hopefully it will make sense to the doctor.

I can't stop weeing, which is another thing that made me think I was. My mind must be playing tricks on me.

It may not make sense to the doctor, try not to be put off if that's the case. Some doctors just are not into temping info and rely on blood work etc. But that's fine and why you are there, you can show that you have done what you can and now need some help. I think that's the way to look at it.

In my first month of charting I was sure I was pregnant. With all kind of (subjective) "symptoms". I made a (mental) list of all of them to disregard in the next cycle. Next cycle, no symptoms. The mind does play tricks...

You still have a right to know where you are at (eg if you are perimenopausal, which I bet you aren't) and the GP should help with this but it's worth telling a porky pie - say you're been TTC for a year so they take you seriously. And remember many women go on to have DCs in their 40s (I've been hoping to have my second and I turned 40 last November). It may take longer than your other two, of course. I've been TTC for well over a year but have discovered that we have more of an issue with DP who got a very bad SA result this January - my results seem ok for 40. So you never can tell.... We're trying acupuncture and no booze for him (I've already been super healthy for ages).

Is it worth taking some control for yourself - ie, a bit of exercise and an organic diet with lots of protein? This may help boost your confidence and improve the regularity of your periods. You could also consider acupuncture for fertility but it's not for everyone.

Try to stay positive and good luck.

Thanks, yes, I could do with a bit more exercise. I am trying to eat healthily but I keep losing and gaining the same two pounds which is getting a bit annoying. Losing a bit of weight would be the best thing but I am trying to do it gradually which I am finding quite hard.

I had a friend who tried for ages and then got pg after acupuncture which was probably just a coincidence but it has encouraged me to look into things like that. I am under a lot of stress at the moment which isn't helping, I'm sure, but it is the sort of stress I can't really do anything about, so I am

Thanks, yes, I could do with a bit more exercise. I am trying to eat healthily but I keep losing and gaining the same two pounds which is getting a bit annoying. Losing a bit of weight would be the best thing but I am trying to do it gradually which I am finding quite hard.

I had a friend who tried for ages and then got pg after acupuncture which was probably just a coincidence but it has encouraged me to look into things like that. I am under a lot of stress at the moment which isn't helping, I'm sure, but it is the sort of stress I can't really do anything about. I must be internalizing it all, apart from having a rant on here about it.

It wouldn't be a lie to say I have been trying for a year as I haven't been using any contraception, but we have been actively trying at what we assumed was the correct time for 6 months.

I've been taking preconception vitamins and I am down to my last one, so yesterday I bought the bloody pregnancy ones. I expect they have the same ingredients anyway, but I feel a fool now. I what else I could be taking. I have heard about B vitamins for irregular periods but I have never really looked into any of this.

I had naively assumed that when I ordered a massive pack of ovulation tests, pregnancy tests and the thermometer that I would just automatically get pregnant before I had even used any of it. That's the way things usually work in my house with buying stuff.

Sorry, I have a new computer and I keep pressing the wrong thing by mistake.

I would see a GP and try to pick one who has an interest in gynae- letters DRCOG/MRCOG after their name should indicate this. S/he should be able to arrange tests and may be happy to offer you clomid if you are not ovulating.
As far as I know menarche age does not affect menopause age, however your mothers menopause age can give you an indicator if you may enter menopause prematurely.

Thanks, I will have a look at the surgery website and see if there is one with those letters. Round here it is pot luck if you phone for an appointment on the day, or you can book many weeks in advance online and select the doctor. Perhaps I would be better waiting for an appointment, it's just that it all seems so urgent. I'm very aware of time passing me by. Sigh.

Btw - one month's charting is hardly conclusive re' ovulation (or lack of). The best way to confirm this is with the post-ov blood test measuring your progesterone levels. This is available on the NHS. There are so many aspects that may need checking though. And stress is bound to be mucking you around... poor you.

Of course everything may be fine - I've been fine for well over a year but still haven't had a hint of a BFP. But then we are facing male fertility issues, which I hope will be improved from this month onwards.

I suspect that TTC in your late 30s, early 40s takes patience and trust in your body - both rather hard to muster.

At least you have 2DCs - enjoy them while they're young. I keep trying to remind myself that this should be one of the loveliest times of life with a healthy happy toddler at my side and no one who is ill - shouldn't be a constantly unhappy time enduring the 2ww and the monthly disappointment. But I know how hard it is to conquer these upsetting feelings.

xxx

Thanks, yes, I agree, I can't base all my conclusions on one month of charting, but I do regret not starting earlier. For all I know my chart could have been haywire for years. I just blithely assumed everything would be okay because it was before.

I went out this morning to a cafe with DS and he was so adorable I felt bad for wanting another, and I know I am so fortunate to have the two I have. Then I felt down again as I am having bad period pains (don't usually) and a troop of mums with young babies in prams came in and I thought that will never be me again. I don't want to get depressed about it so I am constantly trying to look for positive things about 2 child families, such as cars, hotel rooms etc.

We have always told people that we want 3 so that people wouldn't be surprised if we had 3 and assume it was an accident, so now we find I am under scrutiny for signs of pregnancy. Laughable now!

Fwiw, my first three charts were really inconclusive and I panicked and went to my GP we had been ttc over a year.! and with a bit more accuracy I found more of a pattern. I'd suggest using Fertility friend for inputting your data which will help you establish your ovulation patterns. It's worth asking your GP to do routine bloods to check your egg reserves and progesterone levels to see what's going on.
There are lots of positives about two child families but if you has your heart set on three, it's worth asking for investigations.

Thanks, yes, I will try FF. I bought TCOYF and just photocopied the page. I am going to buy a whizzy new phone to cheer myself up as mine is about to die and I think there might be an app or something. Will check it out.

I don't always wake up at the same time every day, and DH wakes up for work at all sort of funny hours so that might be affecting my chart too. I think I was at school the last time I woke up at the same time every day.

Since charting I actually wake myself at the same time every day even weekends! because the variable waking times definitely affected my charts. I literally wake up, temp, put it into FF and go back to sleep but it has improved my charting accuracy. FF has a good mobile site actually, very user friendly,

Don't delay.
As people have said, being 40 or over does have its hurdles in terms of fertility, so the quicker you fully understand your whole picture (i.e. yours and your partners fertility) then the quicker you'll know the best route for you.
Some ladies only start ttc in their 40s and GPs help them, so why delay, you are entitled to the same investigations as anyone else.
Good luck hun x

Saw the GP today. They took blood and I am going back for a 21 day test next month. Other than that, there isn't anything they are going to do. I am going to wait for the results and then try to work out what to do next.

Sounds good from the GP.
To temp I set my alarm for the same time everyday. Take my temp, then go back to sleep or get up depending on the day.

Sadly my problem is not oversleeping! I don't sleep well anyway, so I usually wake up around 5 or 5.30, and sometimes DH has to set his alarm for 3.30 for work and then I can't get back to sleep after that. We keep very odd hours!