1st time Mum with husband who has 2 children from previous marriage

[Jenny23]

This is my first day and first post - I didn't quite know where to put it but figured this would be a good starting point.
I am married (10 weeks in) to a lovely man who has two great children from a previous marriage. They are 10 & 7, I have no children. We have talked extensively about having a family of our own, both of us are keen but there is something that is not sitting quite right with me at the moment.... that is that he has been through pregnancy, birth etc all with someone else. Part of me is trying to tell the rest of me that's a good thing - the voice of experience! The other side of me feels that I have something to live up to - and that as a woman there is something slightly disempowering about that feeling and I imagine that in pregnancy the one thing you need to have is your power!
Any thoughts/advice very gratefully recieved.
Many thanks Mums!

I have 2 children, 5 and 3 and a 19 year old step-daughter. I can understand how you are feeling. When I was pregnant with DD, I asked my husband if "It wasn't as special for him because he had done it before?" he was really sad that I could even suggest it. In my experience, it has made no (negative) difference at all. My husband was wonderful throughout both pregnancies and births and the fact that he had done it before with someone different made no difference at all. Every baby is special and nothing can take away from the pride and excitement of a new father. How does your husband feel about starting the journey again?

I'd say go for it, the fact you have married this man shows you love and trust him and that you are fully commited to life together. Good luck !!!

Thanks for your comment - you have helped to reassure me. Great advice!

I have a friend in almost exactly the same situation as you. She says that the government guidelines on various aspects of baby-rearing, plus carseats/cots/toys/cartoons/whatever have all changed so much since her DH had his kids that it's totally a new field for him.

PLus one woman alone can have wildly differing pregnancies/labours and every baby is different. Looked at that way, I don't think you have anything to worry about. It's as new to him as it is to you!

Try to enjoy the experience with him and not dwell on the past - I think you'll be happier for it :)