they're saying it might be ectopic and leaving me to wait 5 days!!

[tasmaniandevilchaser]

I'm a mess, I just can't stop crying. They said my HCG levels mean I'm either going to have a miscarriage or I've got an ectopic pregnancy, then to come back on Friday for another blood test.

I had a MMC 3 months ago and I am just on the floor now. How do I get up and go to work tomorrow?

eliza quick question about methotrexate, how long did it take you to get back to normal afterwards?

I'm thinking I'll take next week off work. With the MMC, I needed more time for the emotional side, because it was such a terrible shock. This time I wasn't expecting to stay pregnant, because of the bleeding.

Tasman Sorry i just saw your question. I had two weeks off work, partly because of the emotional side but also the the thing methatrexate is there is a small risk of rupture while it i working which if I remember rightly gets less as the weeks go on.

Take it easy and listen to your body, if you are at all worried get yourself to early pregnancy assessment unit or A&E. As far as afterwards, if possible see how you feel, your gp should be happy to sign you off for as long as you need.

I'm sorry your going through this its is totally crap.

Good luck for today, sweetheart. Like Eliza says, take things easy and take care of yourself.

thanks Northey, DH has taken a couple of days off work. I'm not supposed to be on my own, in case it ruptures (before or after the injection). It's been a very wierd weekend, though I'm not in pain, I've been aching in my side, which is frightening.

I think I'm still in shock, as I remember from the MMC, what comes after the shock is worse

It is a horrid weird time all right. I'm glad you've got someone with you. Circumstances meant I was alone through most of mine (the preceding pain and the aftermath of the operation) and it was not much fun. When do you head off to hospital?

Oh god, I can't believe you did that all on your own! All this is supposed to make you stronger I suppose . I'm so lucky to have DH, my parents are also begging me to go and stay with them and DD, but all the blood tests that will come make it a bit awkward.

They said come in at 2.30pm, as they had to order in the methotrexate and didn't want me to wait around. I'm still not sure if I'm in shock. I often feel quite angry and cold, I'm not sure what's coming next. Work have been very kind though, people's kindness - it does all help. Thanks for checking in Northey

I know what you mean about people's kindness. Lying in hospital for 24 hours before I could go home, people's posts on here became incredibly important to me.

Angry coldness might be your mind's way of keeping you going while you still need to deal with practical things. Like you said with your MMC, that might all change once you having nothing to do except accept it :(

Thinking of you today tas. Glad you're not by yourself.

Thanks winkly. I have just heard from the hospital, they haven't got the methotrexate in yet. It won't be in until tomorrow. This is like a bad joke. I said I wanted to come in anyway today for bloods and rescan, I can't just sit around waiting for it to be too late for an injection (my levels were 1133 on Friday and had been doubling every 48 hrs, I really hope they're not still doubling otherwise it will be getting too late - you need levels of 3000 or under to have the injection)

just got in from hospital, the consultant says I'm a candidate for either surgery or methotrexate. We're waiting for the results of the blood test done today, what we decide is dictated by those results. I can't believe I'm being strung along like this, if they had it in stock, then I could have had it on Friday and not had this awful wait. I've never had surgery so am apprehensive about it. But methotrexate sounds pretty horrible stuff as well. The consultant says it's unlikely to rupture overnight but the position of the 'blob' means that it will probably rupture by 7 wks. I'm about 6 wks now.

Blood tests results leave me with surgery as the only option, so going in tomorrow. Quite relieved in a way.

I hope it goes well tomorrow tas, it sounds just hideous tbh x

Hi, sorry to hear you're going through this. I had laprascopic surgery for an ectopic just before christmas. For me, waiting and methotrexate was never an option and i was booked in for emergency surgery the same evening i went to a + e with pain and bleeding.

If there's anything i can help with, shout! hope surgery goes smoothly, take it easy post op and be kind to yourself.

It's the best thing, tas. No need to worry back and forth about whether you've made the right decision. Just go in, have it whipped out, have a big sleep and you're done apart from the emotional fallout.

From a practical view, do you have everything sorted to take with you? Are they planning ti keep you in overnight? Don't forget your phone charger.

I hope everything goes smoothly today, tas.

Thanks Northey, I don't think they'll keep me in, they said it was day surgery. I'm trying not to think about what state the other tube is in, I'm expecting the worst - I've got used to bad news over the last few months. I'm dreading coming round and them saying we took both tubes out, or the other tube doesn't look good.

I'm trying to make myself think about one thing at a time - deal with getting ready for the surgery and then I'll collapse in a heap. My parents are desperate for me to go and stay with them (DD is with them now, I just can't wait to see her and hug and kiss her like a madwoman!)

It's not at all certain your other tube will be bad as well, you know. My second tube was fine so I still have it. And lots of women here also had their second tube left and then conceived via it. And if you already have a dd, that's a really strong indication that you have a tube which is healthy and functional.

So just try not to worry about that aspect, and concentrate on getting the surgery sorted.

thanks, you're right, but I'm just so worn down with it all. With the MMC even in the depths of it all I could imagine feeling better again with time and TLC. With this my head is such a mess, I can't see any light at all. I've just got to think about one thing at a time. And my lovely DD, who is a miracle!

I too had emergency laparoscopy for an ectopic a few days after methotrexate injection as it didn't work. The embryo was found on my ovary not in my tube. Ovary was left inactive. I was told that tubes could move across to the other ovary. Seems true as I had a successful pregnancy afterwards. Good luck and go immediately to A&E if you have any pain or "oddness". x

Hope you're home safely.

Hi, back home now. Stayed in last night as it all finished very late and I was feeling a bit faint. I couldn't sleep at all, even though it was so quiet in there (compared to a post natal ward anyway!) I literally couldn't keep my eyes open but still couldn't sleep. Every half hour a nurse's mobile would go off very very loudly and by 4am this woman started to shout every time it went off "enough of the mobile ring tones!!!" followed by the sound of the nurse sucking her teeth I am very tired now and intend to do nothing for 2 weeks.

Surgery was straight forward - they took out most of left tube, apparently it was getting ready to rupture, I was only 6 weeks! Some people don't even know they're pregnant then or on their first pregnancy wouldn't know it wasn't right. I didn't really have any symptoms, just a little bit of spotting/bleeding, which everyone says is normal. I was just on hyper alert because of the MMC in November.

The right tube looks fine, I saw the photos, including my ovaries, liver, and womb. Quite interesting to see it all, it all looked very healthy to me. Stuck between feeling sore but fine and wondering when it's all going to come crashing down...... Luckily I'm already booked into see counsellor from MMC. I say luckily, I don't feel very lucky! Thanks for posting everyone, it has helped.

Hey tas. Glad that you're home, pleased the other tube looks fine, and really glad you're booked in for counselling.

Nothing productive to add except go easy on yourself and let yourself feel what you feel iykwim, and do try to talk to your dh if you possibly can. Take care.