Pregnancy No. 2 not happening :-(

[UnimaginitiveDadThemedUsername]

Just need to vent...

DD1 conceived instantly in 2007, despite the fact that me and Mrs UDTU were a bit overweight and were in late 40s.

But second child not appearing. Tried for about six months last year (once each month in latter part of fertile cycle), employing use of folic acid and software to predict best time to conceive.

We stopped for a couple of months so that Mrs UDTU could be un-pregnant and drunk for her 40th birthday, and have now started trying again a bit earlier in the cycle, but with no luck so far.

Frustrating thing has been that each month, she has felt like she was pregnant right up to the point she had her period. I've done a sperm test and the count figures are fine.

Admittedly, we have been following the advice of one of those slightly bonkers American books that recommends sex once and late in the cycle to tip the balance into conceiving a boy, but given we have been incredibly fertile in the past it's a bit of a shock to find that it's just not happening this time round.

She is starting to think that maybe she just cannot conceive boys. This seems a bit bizarre, but am starting to wonder if there is anything in this.

Any thoughts/advice/flames?

Are you in your late forties or just 40, your post is unclear?

I would say given your age you are bonkers to be trying to conceive a particular sex and delaying your SWI to fit in with that. You should be going at it like bunnies in the week before and day of ovulation. 6 months is not that long especially given you have only been having sex once in the fertile period. Get going and best of luck.

Bugger. Late 30s, not late 40s.

I'm so sorry to hear you're struggling to conceive, however, given your wife's age and the length of time you've been trying I would definitely ditch any attempts to try and conceive a boy and just have as much sex as you can both manage during her fertile time to conceive a baby. Gender family planning is fraught at any time (and most of it is a load of bollocks) but if your wife is over fertility is dropping all the time and you need to forget any nonsense about only having sex once a month.

Good luck x

over 40 her fertility is dropping

Lots of luck.

Quit trying to have a boy and just shag away as much as you can. It's 50/50 anyway, I think. :)

So you're only having sex once a month?

Presumably you wouldn't be ttc if you wouldn't be happy with a boy OR a girl? In which case stop faffing around and start having sex every other day.

Does she have regular periods? If so then focus on ovulation, if not then do it all month :) also tell your wife to look for signs of ovulation.

I was 28 when I got pregnant with our youngest and it took us about 9 months I think so its not that unusual BUT you haven't got time on your side and you aren't doing everything you can to maximise your chances.

Good luck.

So the consensus is that we should have lots of sex.

That's terrible. :o

Does 'lots' mean daily, or more frequently? I don't know if we can manage mornings and nights.

Every other day ime/o.

Oh at least 3 times a day !

I would go for every other day too - as long as your wife is agreeable to that of course!

I was told at least 4 times a week, for the whole of her cycle. Aparently, couples who have sex 3-4 times a week throughout the whole month get pregnant the quickest. It's hard going though! We are also trying for DC2 and have been for a while now. Good luck!

Every other day from when her period finishes through the whole month. Forget the boy thing, and be happy to conceive full stop!!

Yup I agree. You need to have lots more sex. Lots. And then some more.

2007 is quite a long time ago! I have just turned 40 too and compared to 37.5 this is making a huge difference. I was pg 2nd cycle if living with DP in 2009. One year on TTC and no luck.
Fertility goes from 1:4 chance of BFP each month to 1:10 BY AGE 40.
H
sex every other day and knowing her cycle well so sex close to ov is best but still no guarantee. Has she been tested for good hormone levels? Worth considering if it's been 6 months....

Update:

Mrs. U missed period - POAS showed faint cross last week and since then she has been feeling slightly nauseous, funny tummy niggles, tender boobs...

She says it feels different to last time.

Am now paranoid about this first three months. Didn't want to say anything in case I jinx it, but thought someone may be encouraged by this news.

FAB Unimag - everything crossed for you (bar her legs etc). ALL THE BEST and pl keep us posted (I'm a sim age & situation) x

Great news, just a bit of advice though. I've got 3 dc and each pregnancy was different- but all 3 were boys. I'm sure you'll be happy with a healthy child boy or girl though

Spoke too soon. Wife had big cramps and heavy bleeding last night, and still doesn't feel good. Back to square one, I guess.