TTC 6+ months plus, part 2

[skeletonbones]

New thread as the old one was getting to 1000. So, 4 BFP's in the last thread, lets see if we can up the total considerably on this one :)

Meh indeed eurochick . I POAS this morning and BFN. I expect therefore to be joining you in the corner very soon.

It really sucks doesn't it . BFD was me (tm pending) and that really sums it up. I actually don't test that often, as my cycles seem to have been getting slightly shorter and combined with spotting, there is never any point. Am 13dpo so probably technically still a bit early, but I've had a bit more pinky discharge (TMI) so im sure it's just a matter of time. At least my cycle is a bit longer this time so we won't miss the fertile time by my being away next weekend. Plus, who wants a March baby anyway

I'm out too. Meh indeed. Not sure what the period pains on Friday were all about when AF didn't actually come to the party until this morning. Just another ploy by the evil cow to mess with my head!

Sorry to hear that so many of us have bombed at the same time.

I'm so fed up of this now. Had a few more tears this morning but more in frustration than anything else. I'm now firmly back in the train of thought that there HAS to be something wrong. DP has been remarkably sweet about it all this month and suggested that he buy me a rabbit when we were at Pets at Home today. I was a bit [confused}
If he buys me a pet every time my period comes I will be opening a petting zoo before long!

I agree Nelly that we should all have an April baby. Nice weather, Easter, bank holidays. All in all a much better baby birthday month!

really sorry to hear that this month is out pout, spirita, euro, and nelly there seems to be some major cycle syncing going on in this thread, hopefully it will mean a wave of BFPs all together soon :)
Nelly I am going to use BFD forever more now as so much more fitting than BFN. On an unrelated note I've always thought that the MN term for useless male partner who leeches off the woman while contributing nothing to the household should be 'cock squatter' rather than 'cock lodger' as a lodger does at least pay rent for the room!

I've realised I will be getting my period on holiday this month but towards the end of the week, and am debating whether to pack a preg test to take with me, to avoid getting my hopes up on hols and then getting a BFD in the midst of mountains of washing, getting back to reality stuff when I return which would somehow seem worse that getting it on holiday and cheering myself up with a few cocktails?!

Ladies, very sorry about all the AF starting today but Arghhh I am so bloody confused, AF arrived today for me as wll, 5days early and about 8 dpo. I had a very standard 10/11 Lp which the doc was trying to increase with clomid but what the he'll has it done. That's it I have given it 2 months and i am goig to try and get back to my usual cycle , this is just stressing me out. Now off to ask MN whether Anyone knows what is going on!!

Morning all,

Sorry joycep about your cycle troubles. So incredibly frustrating for you. When are you due to see the specialist again?

Seems like a rather miserable weekend with multiple arrivals of AF. It reminds me of living in an all female residence where everyone seemed to be on the same cycle. Was hellish for hormones :)

I'm actually just into the 2ww myself. Not a whole lot of swi this month. Only actually managed it twice, but at the best times, so I am still hopeful. DH is going to give his first sample on Wednesday and he's supposed to save himself for a few days . Quite nice to have someone else telling me that we have no choice but to take it easy this month!

Really sorry AF has turned up for so many of you. It's awful, and doesn't get any easier even after so many months. People who get pregnant straight away have no idea how lucky they are. I can't believe that my friend who got pregnant after 3 months thinks that she had to wait ages to get a BFP. And now all she is doing is moaning about feeling sick. Of course, I'm not in the slightest bit jealous .

DH has just handed in his second sample and then he sees the urologist again next week so hoping we might have some more answers after that. I can't see my doctor again until AF starts so it's typical that I think I ovulated later than usual.

joycep can you speak to your gynae about clomid and what it is doing to your cycle? I guess it makes sense that it changes things but not sure if the changes you have are a good or bad thing. I've just been reading a biography of someone and in that she mentions that she took clomid for 18 months before falling pregnant with her first child, this was in the States and about 15 years ago, I can't imagine having to take it for that long.

Skeleton I like your forward thinking about taking a test with you to avoid any potential disappointment of a BFD mixed with post holiday blues! I don't think that anybody does forward thinking quite like a TTC lady

Joycep I can't believe that your cycle has been messed up like that when you're supposed to be in the hands of an expert. You must be livid not to mention ruddy confused. Weren't you on progesterone to increase your LP? Are you ditching the Clomid now then?

Madness My DP was never told to "save" himself before giving a sample. Yet another example of differing medical advice. It never ceases to amaze me all the different advice we have all got on here from the so called professionals.

Well I have been busy Googling Endo and have decided to make an appointment to see my GP to discuss this because scarily I seem to have a lot of the symptoms. I'm a bit pissed off because it seems that Endo is the cause of a high percentage of unexplained infertility cases and it seems that when I saw the gynae I did unwittingly flag many of the symptoms but this was brushed aside. I just feel more and more like my experiences with the gynae were a total waste of time.

X-posted Mrsden

Your friend sounds a bit er, trying! I assume that she doesn't know about your struggles? Talking of I think that DP's cousin has had his baby because I overheard a telephone conversation between DP & his Mum and he was trying so hard to be cryptic but it was so obvious! I feel like such a bitch because I am so envious. Of course it didn't help that it has coincided with the arrival of my AF! I hope that you can get to see the consultant sooner rather than later, it's so typical if AF does a late show just because you want it to come.

I know pout I'd normally be willing AF to stay away but now I want it to come as soon as. Did your DP try to be cryptic to protect you? That is sweet if so. I know that DH now filters his news from work colleagues to take out anything baby related.

My friend doesn't know we're trying, I had thought I might tell her because we are very close but then I found out she was pregnant and I don't think I can anymore because I know she wouldn't understand. Maybe I'm underestimating her it's just I don't think people who haven't experienced it can really empathise and know what you feel. And I want to talk to someone who understands not someone who tries to be sympathetic and say the right thing if you know what I mean? And all the time I'd be talking to her I'd be think "she's pregnant, what would she know?"

I've read that endo is quite hard to diagnose, do you have very painful periods?

madness my DH was told to abstain for 3 days before the sample. But not for longer than 5. All these rules get confusing.

Now the Daily Mail is speculating when Kate Middleton will get pregnant, oh and Victoria Beckham is having her baby today so there will be no escaping that.

Morning All,

Madness / pout - my DH was told to save himself for 48 hrs before giving a sample. It does show you the difference in opinions and what people are told.

pout - i do think that is a very good idea to go and speak about endo to someone. I know it sounds scary but you should ask for a laparascopy especially as you have symptoms. I can't believe you have flagged up symptoms and no one has said anything. And then doctors have the gall to roll their eyes when people tell them they have been googling things. We wouldn't have to google if we felt we are all in good hands. Everything seems normal for both you and DP, and before even considering IUI or IVF, if that's what has been mentioned to you, then it would be best to rule out Endo first. Imagine if that has been the problem all along...they can zap it and then hopefully that will do the trick.

Mrsd - i hope your DH gets more answers this time and you have more of an idea of what is going on.

DH wants to give things a rest for a while. He has told me to stop the clomid and thinks we should stop seeing the doctor for a while and start using condoms again(!). I think I will do one more trip in a couple of weeks to tell her that clomid has made my situation worse. I may just get loads of boxes of progesterone and just stick to that. I got thrush again last week, a week after having got rid of it and i don't know why that is happening either. Anyway I met a friend who also had a miscarriage exactly the same time as me last year and like me she had got pregnant very quickly. Anyway a year later nothing has happened to her either and she isn't seeing anyone about it. So i may take a leaf out of her book and continue as normal. Saw my pregnant friend as well who insisted I felt her stomach about ten times during the evening so I could feel their daughter kicking. Weirdly i didn't mind. She knows better not to complain to me about exhaustion and other things...poor you mrsd having to listen to your friend. All i can say is that when it is all our turns, we will be embracing the exhaustion, the sickness and labour with open arms. I have no doubt it is hard and painful but it can't be as hard as this emotional limbo of not being able to get pregnant!!

And what's even more sad about my life is, i read a headline this morning saying, 'Kate, mummy to be in waiting' and my heart started pounding as i thought Kate and Wills had announced a pregnancy. I don't even bloody know them and I'm panicking about them getting their first. What a loser!!

have you asked your GP about the thrush joycep? I read a magazine at the hairdressers on sat and in the ask the Dr column there was a letter from someone who keeps getting thrush. The advice was that she needs to see the GP because over the counter stuff doesn't always work and doctors can prescribe much more effective stuff. It also said applying natural live yoghurt can help or adding bicarb of soda to a bath .

I think you are right Mrsden that nobody can understand what it like to go through this, probably least of all a pregnant person. It amazes me sometimes how little sympathy or understanding people who have had children have towards IVF funding and the like. I get quite cross when my Mother and sister just come out with platitudes, it's like their lips move but they don't actually "feel" what they are saying IYSWIM. My sister actually said that she would have a baby for me which on the surface seems like a nice thing but I just know that if (and I wouldn't in a million years) I said "okay then, lets do it" she would backtrack so quickly!

I think that I have painful periods though it's hard to know what is normal because people don't seem to discuss periods do they. I have to take painkillers every 4 hours for the first two days of AF and they don't always take away the pain completely so I think that would be considered painful? I also struggle with clots which is a sign, as well as a few other strange things that I didn't realise were connected like hip pain, bowel problems, tiredness, frequent urination, there is also a link to PCOS. I just feel that at this point I ought to at least discuss it with my GP because I would hate to look back in a few years and wish I had.

Joycep Are you going to have a break and go back to using contraception? How do you feel about that suggestion? I really think that it would be worth telling your consultant that the Clomid has made things worse & at least see what she says. Did you ever see anyone on the NHS about your LP?

I so wish that we could all just do the "normal" thing of unprotected SWI and get upduffed.

I'm sorry that you had to repeatedly touch your friends bump. I don't know how you managed that. I got all teary over baby bunnies!

It's funny, I saw Kate on TV at the weekend and for a second thought she was pregnant. I'm a bit witchy over some things so maybe it was a premonition!

not liking this new log in thing on MN, I keep losing posts as I am so slow at writing.

Mrsd - that's intersting. I will go and discuss it with my GP and see if I can get something else for it. It's so weird how I never had it before last year and now it's every month.

Pout - i can't believe you have such painful periods and have to pop pills. They definietely need to explore Endo, I think you should definitely demand a Lap. All the other symptoms you mentioned I have which has now slightly concerned me (the hypo that i am)! I have noticed I can't get through the night anymore with out getting up for a piddle, do you have that?

I spoke to my GP about the short LP but she said it didn't matter. DH goes away for 3 or 4 months at the end of this year and I told him we would obviously be stopping then so in the meantime i wish to carry on. TBH i think i am quite looking forward to our break - i wonder whether i will stop thinking about it. I will most likely be sobbing my eyes out everyday because i will miss him so much.

I'm kind of glad that you agree that popping pills like that isn't right Joycep. I wasn't sure and wondered whether everyone was like that. I think that's because my sister really suffered before she went on the pill so I thought it was normal for a long time. My GP suggested that the gynae ought to do a lap way back when she referred me so I am hoping that second time around my GP won't think that I am wasting her time. Like you I worry about being seen as a hypochondriac!

I sympathise with the nocturnal toilet trips, the night time is a nightmare. I have to go several times before I drop off to sleep and then at least a couple of times in the night (it's worse just before AF - do you find that?). My DP jokes that I should write a good toilet guide rating the best public toilets.

I'm glad that you are carrying on TTC, there's nothing to lose even if your DH doesn't want to carry on with the consultant. I don't reckon I'll ever bother with contraception again. If ever we complete our family I'll be bloody menopausal anyway.

Will your DH be away for Xmas? Are you good at being home alone? I'm really bad at it and find myself eating cereal for every meal because there's no point cooking for just me.

pout it sounds like you really should speak to your doctor about endo. I take one or two ibuprofen at the most during my period, usually just the first day. And I could get by without taking any if I had to. Although I feel crampy, sore and uncomfortable it's not unbearable, although strangely I have had a few really bad periods in the past but I think it's more of a worry if it's a consistent thing. My periods are quite heavy for a couple of days and clotty too.

joyep having a break might do you good, but would you have to start using contraception again? I suppose it means you won't be symptom spotting.

I bet kate is pregnant by xmas, there must be enormous pressure on her. I hope for her sake she doesn't end up on our thread!!

at Kate Middleton on our thread.

I think she'd fit right in!

Joycep

Where did you read about being irresponsible and clomid if ovulating - if you know what I mean?

Thanks

Hello all,

Can I join?

DP & I have been ttc since I stopped the pill last November. Am now on my 8th cycle, and though I used to be regular as clockwork in the dim & distant past before I went onto the pill, since coming off cycles have varied a bit between 25-30 days.

I went to see the GP last week (I'm 35), and have been given forms to have blood tests taken (1-5 day, 21 day & a more general one). Annoyingly it was cd5 when I saw her & by the time I came out all of the testing places were closed for the day, so I'm going to have to patient and wait for next cycle before I go for these.

On a better note though I've already had an appointment through to have an ultrasound on Friday and been advised that if they can't get a clear view, they'll put a camera up while I'm there. GP also said that DP should expect a package through the post re having his sperm looked at. Presumably he'll need to take it somewhere - sure we'll find out when it arrives!

Feeling a bit nervous about Friday, but good on the whole that we're moving forward. Think I should be ovulating any day now too (will be poas when I get in from work), so you never know it might happen anyway...

Fingers crossed all.

pout I take loads of painkillers for the first few days of my period too. They're always heavy (with icky clots) and come with very unwelcome bowel issues. I've wondered about endo as well, but always feel like I'm being a drama queen. After all, maybe I just have a lower pain threshold than other people? Have blamed the other symptoms on a hormone imbalance that is as yet undiagnosed . I can't see that it would hurt to ask your doc though. If my day 21 tests come back normal then I'll be asking at the fertility clinic.

Have decided that rather than being jealous of my friend with her new baby, I am going to take perverse pleasure out of her moaning about sleepless nights and tantrum-prone toddlers while I sit in my back garden sipping wine and enjoying the beautiful summer weather. One day I will look back on these days and long for the ability to lie in and then do whatever I want :)

Wow the thread has been busy today! Sorry about the ruination of your weekend for so many. I'm not actually sure I'm on CD1 yet, as I'm still spotting; but I am only deluding myself to think it's anything other than a BFD this month. I've had a moan on the other thread I'm on, so will just say again here.

It certainly seems bizarre about the different levels of interest/options for fertility testing that are available across the country. I've only really had the first lot of blood tests so far, but I think I got lucky with the GP I saw. For instance he said that something wasn't recommended to be tested unless you were 37, but I pointed out I would be in a few weeks, so he arranged the test anyway. Re the sperm analysis, OH was advised it should be between 3 and 7 days since his last effort - hence I made him have sex yesterday .

I agree pout that having to take so many painkillers doesn't seem normal. Yes there are differing pain thresholds, but not by that much! Pushing for further tests seems like a good plan, fingers crossed it's helpful in the end.

Hello pixie, welcome :). Now the really important question - have you had a big wedding and been to Canada recently . Eek at the dildo-cam, though I've been told it's not too uncomfortable. Like you, I feel better knowing that investigations are being started. Better to know what you are dealing with, I think.

welcome pixie, don't worry about the camera. I had it a few weeks ago and it didn't hurt at all and wasn't even uncomfortable. Much better than having a smear. Also, it was really quick. As soon as she put it in the Doctor could see my uterus and then looked at each ovary. If they know what they're doing, they can quickly establish if all looks ok. I think it took no more than 10 mins in total.

thatway I was thinking the same as you, I am going to make a point of doing all the things that my pregnant friends and friends with children can't over the next few months and then I am going to boast, boast, boast about it to them!