Sex while TTC: Any advice on how to stop it from turning into a chore?

[lalabaloo]

I'm sure I can't be the only one who is finding it difficult to actually want to have sex at the right time? DH and I don't have huge sex drives anyway and i'm really struggling to want to do it. We are only on month 4 (and I have a lot of respect for people who have been trying much longer!) and I just can't make myself want to have sex, is this abnormal? DH and I have a very happy and loving relationship so there aren't any issues there.

have a glass or 2 or 3 of the vino . Try spicing up your bedroom activities, different positions, toys etc lol

Thanks Piglet I just really don't do sexy at all lol, wine sounds like a good plan!

Why don't you want to do it?
It's only a few days in a month that you need to do it anyway, and even then they say every other day, so you could probably get away with only doing it 3 times, or something like that??

I'm with you OP, to be honest our sex life is pretty uneventful at the best of times, and now it seems like we're forcing the issue because of TTC.

Like you, relationship is not the problem, lots of affection, kisses and cuddles etc, so it's not a symptom of marital troubles or anything. I think it is hard after being together for 9 yrs to keep it exciting and fresh.

So sorry, don't have advice, just wanted to let you know I'm in the same boat as you and can empathise!

Hmm we've been ttc for 15 months! Dh had performance issues at times so we have 'naked time' which helps us relax. Get some massage oil and do back.rubs (the skin to skin is relaxing and usually leads to bd!). The thing we stipulate is that we don't expect to have sex every time but we provide ourselves with opportunities.
*note: have baby wipes handy post massage in case things do end up moving forward, otherwise if you touch him with the massage oil then having sex can be rather unpleasant! Learnt that the hard (and sore) way! Boots do a nice "sensuous" massage oil.

No advice here either, but you have my sympathy. We're also on month 4 and the thought of TTC for months and months makes me tired just thinking about it! But I figure, the more you do it, the more you feel like it, so just close your eyes and think of... anything that gets you going! Good luck!

I'm with you on this and no advice as i don't do sexy either. for me it's the monotony of being in the same bed and same flat month after month that makes it feel like a chore. Change of scenery really helps and i'm more up for it if we're at a hotel or not in the flat. unfortunately, planning a weekend away or holiday that actually coincides with ovulation seem nigh on impossilbe.

Thanks for the replies :) I'm glad it's not just me! Karbea I think it's just that we don't usually have a lot of sex and it's the thought of having to do it that makes it worse, I know we don't "have" to, but if we want a baby we do really! Bexamundo that sounds like a good idea, maybe if we don't pressure ourselves to actually have sex every time we might feel more like it, and we enjoy lots of cuddles so massage might help :)

Hope it helps!!