Is it ever the right time to have another baby?
leander · 01/09/2003 22:49
I've got a 19mth old ds and would really like to have another baby BUT, I keep telling myself it's not the right time.Dh doesn't have a great job so I say we should wait till he gets a better one but I don;t know how long that will take.I want to enjoy our time with ds but I don't want to leave too big a gap.I want us to have a nice holiday abroad next year(a bit selfish I know)and the usual of can we afford it but i suppose that will always be a question.What do you guys think?Will I keep going round in circles trying to decide if the time is right?
anais · 01/09/2003 23:14
I would suggest that if you have reservations then it's not the right time. When it feels right it is right - there's no hurry, is there?
tinyfeet · 02/09/2003 04:17
Leander, there are so many threads on this. I personally think that there is never a 'right time' and you can never have enough money or the 'right job'. We end up compromising because DP or DH wants another, or we end up getting broody, we have accidents, or we just decide we may be getting too old. Maybe I'm too cynical about this, but I'm due to have DD2 in December - a mistake - earlier than I would have wanted, but am dealing with the situation as best I can.
Jemma7 · 02/09/2003 09:28
I agree that there is never a right time to have a baby!
No matter how much or how little money you have, if someone takes a chunk of it away you are going to notice the difference.
I think if you have uncertainties about it then you should sit down and talk with DP/DH about it - No good going into something like this if you are unsure.
Sorry if this isn't much help!
aloha · 02/09/2003 13:16
Not if you work freelance, have no maternity pay and have double the childcare costs it isn't
All the above are my worries, plus still being too fat from last time and time running out!
Lucy124 · 02/09/2003 17:39
I think we're going to try and wait until our son is in state nursery (Age 3) - he's currently 16 months as that may ease childcare costs - couldn't afford both in nursery and can't afford to give up work.
Incidentally am I being thick or is everyone's child called DD, DH or DP or something like that?
quackers · 02/09/2003 18:37
Hi Lucy DH id darling husband, DP is darling partner , dd is darling daughter and ds is darling son!!
SoupDragon · 02/09/2003 18:41
There are always more good reasons not to have a baby then there are to have one The only reason I could find for having DS2 was a rather woolly "I want another one". There were umpteen reasons not to have him but in the end, the 1 reason to have him won out.
Generally, I think that if you wait for the "right time" you'll never get round to it.
tinyfeet · 02/09/2003 19:13
I agree with Soupy - never the right time My one wooly reason that won out was - 'I want DD1 to have a sibling'. Also, I'm not getting any younger . . .
Dec · 04/09/2003 22:48
I have 2 sons - eldest was 7 in June, and the youngest is now 9 months. DS1 was SO excited at getting a sibling, but on one particularly frustrating day (colicy baby, pouring rain outside) he announced that he'd changed his mind and could he have a sister instead! I think that proves there is NEVER a good time to have a second child. On the other hand, childcare is cheaper once the first child is into full time education ...
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