The drinking issue...

[MrsSatsuma]

We're just about to start TTC#1 but have decided if/when BFP appears we only want to tell parents and nobody else at all until 12 weeks. We also don't want anybody to know we're ttc. However, we have Christmas coming up with my family, then New Year with his family - not sure about anyone else but given the amount I've talked about having a family 'in the future' to my mum recently, if I refuse wine all Christmas day I'm fairly sure she will cotton on immediately.

Just wondered what everybody's opinions were on this? I'm not a big drinker anyway (max 1-2 bottles of wine shared with DH per month, if that) and would only have max. 1 glass with lunch, potentially another (small) one in evening. Should I, or shouldn't I??!

I would wait to see nearer the time. You may find you get your period just before, in which case I think it would be ok to drink in moderation, up until ovulation, as you will know you are not pregnant.

If you are pregnant by then, or if you are in the two week wait and are not sure, I wouldn't have alcohol. Having alcohol at Christmas just so that no one suspects, is not a good idea IMO.

Let them gossip if they want to, it's none of their business, and you still don't have to tell them anything until 12 weeks.

You could always do the old "oh, I'm on antibiotics" trick....

Having the same issue. TTC and don't want anyone to know yet. Am going to drive though and there's my excuse not to drink!

I'm not driving anywhere on Christmas Day... or at New Year... and my mum cna read me like a book! Doh!

I really wouldn't worry about it. There was a discussion on one of the relationship threads or AIBU, can't remember which it was but the general consensus was just have a glass of wine and nurture it, sip occasionally and don't mention anything about not drinking, don't play on the old 'I'm on antibiotics/hungover/driving' malarky because people will just latch onto it and ask you again and again. I tried it the other week, didn't mention anything about not drinking, clearly had lemonade for most of the night and no-one batted any eyelid. They all got so hammered no one noticed and the next day they were like 'omg how's your hangover, we were all so drunk'...... The odd glass or two won't hurt while you are trying to conceive. Apparently very little can get to LO for the first 3 or so weeks anyway so even if it is very early days, as long as you don't down a brewery you will be fine. Good luck TTC!

I'm not a doctor btw so the 'nothing getting to LO in the first few weeks' shouldn't be taken as medical advice!!! Do what you feel comfortable with.

I was at various dinner parties and pre-christmas stuff with DH last week in the 2ww and I just accepted drinks, sipped a tiny bit or pretended to and then sporadically emptied a bit out somewhere if I was able, or swapped glasses with DH while no one was looking. If you sit next to each other at dinner that's surprisingly easy to do. It's dependant on DH being prepared to drink your glass as well as his own of course but I'm totally certain that no one noticed I drank virtually nothing over the three days despite mulled wine party, wine with dinners and champagne reception!! Sadly AF is due in a couple of days and I got BFN this morning so it looks like I could have knocked back the booze without concern, but it was worth it not to take the risk to me.

I have drunk a lot of straight tonic during early pregnancy (not so say I drink a lot, you understand). Although I love a G&T, have to say straight T is pretty grim - but it does the trick and means to one is the wiser to you not drinking.

Similar situation for me, to drink or not to drink. I have recently been on antibiotics, and so have a legitimate excuse for maybe being on them again. The only problem will come if my mother (as she does) demands to see the box so she can google the drug, and notices that the pills were from a month ago!