Fertility Tests/Help

[ljg72]

I am 38 and have two dc from a previous relationship, and have been told I cannot be referred for any fertility tests/help due to my age and having children...I fully understand this, but what about my dp? he has no children so this seems unfair to denie him children of his own?.

Oh, I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm not experienced but I didn;t want you to be unanswered.

How long have you been trying?

Thanks Buttonmoon was a bit worried of asking this question as I am very lucky to have two already...but DP and I would love a DC together?...we started trying early this year and conceived twice, but saldly both were lost early on.

It seems to be a really grey area regarding test/help? and my gp has basically told me we will have to fund any tests/treatments.

How about you Buttonmoon? x

Right, well, you're obviously doing something right having conceived twice this year. I know it's hard but keep going. One little baby will be a sticky one, don't lose heart. Without trying to be flip or heartless, but as you are 38, your chances of abnormalities being higher, try and rationalise these losses as being babies who might not have made it to term (imagine losing one at 15wks+) or who might have been so badly disabled as to have limited quality of life. That's how I rationalised my MC many years ago. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say and that I don't upset you at all.

Is the age rule a local PCT thing? Or just your GP's rule? It might be worth finding out.

As for me, I've got 3 dcs, currently ttc #4. I'm only in my first month and just entered my 2ww.

Your right, and thats what we have been trying to tell ourselves, it's still so hard as as you know from the minute you see that line on the test you start planning in your head!.

I am older, but fitter than I have ever been, and we both have a very healthy lifestyle, even more so since ttc...GP seems to totally adverse to helping at all.

I'm just worried I may have an underlying medical condition causing the mc's?.

Good luck to you hope it happens very soon! and so sorry about your mc...so glad I found this site, it's such a fantastic support network for all

I know what you mean - I've not even got that line but I'm already planning next summer!

Maybe your GP is just expecting it to happen anyway? I take it you have no concerns about STDs? Sometimes they can cause MC and can be difficult to spot. (Not that I'm wishing to cause offence!)

We both had a full M.O.T before we started ttc so hopefully that isn't the issue?...did get a bit of cystitis type symptoms just before mc last time? so may have a water infection? will ask gp if he lets me!.

Summer baby sounds good x

I think there is a higher risk of urinary tract infections in early pregnancy, due to ligaments being stretchier and softer, thereby making it easier for bacteria to travel to the ureter, which is shorter in females than males: which is why we are predisposed to cystitis attacks more frequently than the tougher sex! More so during pregnancy. HTH Sorry about the lack of tact and generosity of the dr towards your dh and the fact that he does not have his own biological offspring. Hope that you can reach an amicable solution, FX that you fall pregnant naturally. You've done it before, it may happen when you least expect it: I know it's easier said than done, but try to chillax - a little bit! x