Decision making about what to do with frozen embryos...help?

[ilikeyoursleeves]

Don't think there is an answer to this but I am feeling really sad as I got a letter today from our hospital asking what we want to happen to our frozen embryos. We ttc for 5 years to have ds 1 and had ivf to get him. He was born in 2007 and is just such a joy. I am utterly grateful that the ivf worked first time and we got 7 embryos to freeze too. We were planning to do a frozen transfer last year but amazingly I fell pregnant naturally and had ds2 in 2009. We were again blessed with a beautiful happy little boy and we know how lucky we have been especially as I have met many others who have had difficulty conceiving and who haven't been as lucky.

I do think we would like to have another baby one day but I don't know if that's us ok fertility wise now or if we would use the frozen embies. They are frozen until 2012 but they are looking for decisions now. I can't bear the thought of them perishing but also don't think I could donate them as I would always wonder if I had ' other children' out there and would worry if their lives were ok. But also I know how heart breaking infertility can be so I am feeling guilty about my reluctance to donate.

Anyone been in a similar position?

This sounds really difficult. Forgive my ignorance, but if you kept them to use, how many would be implanted? Would they try all of them?

If so I would probably choose to have them implanted, to give them a chance as it were - without the worry of donating them.

I don't know, that feels like a selfish answer, but I understand where you are coming from.

also if you used them yourselves, it would negate any worries about whether you could conceive naturally - but I don't know when you were planning to have another child, or what is involved in using your embryos.

I got two embryos implanted during our ivf and only one went on to develop into our ds1. So I don't know howe many I'd get implanted if we were to do a frozen transfer. There is a risk that if I got 2 implanted again then we could end up with twins but we would then have 4 kids in total which we can't afford due to the childcare costs all being at the one time.

there is no way I'd get all the embryos implanted for obvious physical and ethical reasons!

re time scales, in an ideal world i would have dc 3 in 2012 once ds1 goes to school and his nursery fees are gone...

I got two embryos implanted during our ivf and only one went on to develop into our ds1. So I don't know howe many I'd get implanted if we were to do a frozen transfer. There is a risk that if I got 2 implanted again then we could end up with twins but we would then have 4 kids in total which we can't afford due to the childcare costs all being at the one time.

there is no way I'd get all the embryos implanted for obvious physical and ethical reasons!

re time scales, in an ideal world i would have dc 3 in 2012 once ds1 goes to school and his nursery fees are gone...

Sorry just realised I posted this twice

If they are consented for 5 years you can keep them in storage up to then, and even extend for a further 5 years if you want. Your Unit may start to charge you for storage, though, but legally they can be frozen for up to ten years. You may need to visit the Unit to fill in new consent forms.