DH won't go to the Dr

[Fairylightfurore]

DH has had lower left quadrant pain for about a year. It's persistent. Some days he's hobbling around clutching his stomach, others he doesn't complain but it's still there. It seems to get worse after drinking/ eating rich foods or going out. He refuses to see the Dr. Says it's pointless but I think he's afraid they're going to tell him he needs to change his lifestyle. I can't get him to change his mind. Anyone had similar? I am afraid it's going to end up being something that was completely cureable that he leaves and makes a lot worse. It's so frustrating.

I would call the surgery and ask your GP to call you. Explain the situation, give them a full description (because your husband will downplay it) book an appointment for him.

Tell your husband that you understand he’s worried but it is unfair of him to allow a treatable condition to become severe and impact on all your lives. So you’ve booked him an appointment on x date and you will drive him there. No ifs or buts.

You do not need to tell him you’ve spoken to the GP. The GP will not discuss your husband with you, but you can certainly talk at them to tell them your concerns so they have a full picture in advance of the appointment

Might that work?

In the past when I've been concerned about my DH's health I've called the GP, made him an appointment then insisted he go to it. He rolls his eyes at me and does as I ask, because he realises how worried I am about him.

I have told him I am booking an appointment before and he just says no. I can try the above approach. Just afraid he won't go and it will be a wasted appointment. It's really frustrating. I don't understand why he doesn't want to know. He only goes to the Dr if it's really bad, but with something like this that's the point it could be too late. I will book one through and if he's ok with it I will go in with him to make sure he mentions everything he needs to.

Perhaps mention that if it is a simple weak bowel problem the doctor can get him some simple medicine to take the problem away ?

He may be catastrophising

I once went to the GP and asked him to call my father in for a routine check up because we were worried about him. Dad wouldn’t go and make an appointment but did go because the GP summoned him. I think you need to explain to your DH that he isn’t being fair to you and that something that might be minor is only going to get worse if he neglects it.

How low? I’m thinking pancreas / gallstones but gallstones tend to be more right but mine was always more central but my pancreas pain (caused by the gallstones) was side. Not much you can do if he won’t go, an earlier trip for me could have saved me 13yrs of constant severe pain, requiring a major pancreas surgery, and countless stents to help keep the duct open and then countless acute pancreatitis attacks caused by procedure to insert the stent. He’s crazy risking long term pain and problems and selfish to his family