Has anyone got an imagination???

[sep1712]

I have had three people phone me today to ask what my 3 dc would like for christmas?
The MIL even came round and got me to show her on the internet! I hate to make suggestions as i don't want to look greedy or grabby.
I understand its better than receiving loads of rubish or the same prezzies but in the past i have given her great ideas then she hasn't got them and the kids are left dissappionted. She's already called me from the shop to say they haven't got something i told her about months ago in stock!!! So she has got something else. I Have done my shopping and can't afford to buy it now. So for another my DD hasn't got the one thing she really wanted.
I think christmas is more than just getting what you want but it was the only thing she asked for!!!

well last year had a bit of a disagreement with my mum as i said i was sick of telling people what to get, so this year she said she would choose.
Just found out she has got ds who is 3 MOONSAND!!!! i am sure that stuff is a nightmare

I know a lot of people hate asking for money or vouchers but could you suggest that instead and then say to your DD she can go in to town and choose something herself after xmas? I am sure your DD will be thrilled with the other presents she gets so wont worry half as much as you. Know exactly what you mean though. I never expect people in my family to spend much on my DC but if they ask I give a couple suggestions and they never get them. My mums the worst for it so I dont even bother suggesting anything to her now.

i have started buying presents from relatives via the internet and being reimbursed. that way people who dont have children and those who are a bit older and forget what little children like don't feel overwhelmed when they go into a shop.

you have to swallow your embarrassment and ask what the budget is and then its done.

this year my dc are going to get

1. age appropriate toys
2. something that they really really would like

and everyone is happy.

if you don't want to seem grabby...suggest a mid price toy that you know your child would like and ask what the relative giving it thinks.

for some people its not about lack of imagination but just cluelessness...i remember the first christmas present i had to but for a nephew i was overwhelmed in elc and spent over £50 in some thomas the tank engine stuff...bah

My ILs just give us a cheque for the DCs, with the expectation that we'll trot off and spend it for them because they can't be arsed to think about presents themselves. And the cheque is always stupidly generous (I know I'm an ungrateful cow) which just piles on the pressure. This year I think at least half is going into the DCs secret bank accounts.

This is annoying. I have a regular routine with my MIL - this happens every Christmas and birthday:

Her - "Have you got any idea what DS would like for his birthday/Christmas?"
Me - "He'd love an "
Her - "Right. What's that?"
Me - "
Her - "Will you just get it and I'll give you the money?"
Me - "OK"

But at least he does get the thing and I don't waste an excellent idea.

Eek- moonsand is a veritable nightmare! Mine got it last Christmas and by 7am it was EVERYWHERE- living room was llike the sahara desert, it was even in between my toes!

In answer to OP, I do ask some people what their kids would like for Christmas, as I hate to buy something that the kid already has. Also it is easy to get out of touch with what kids a different age from your own might want- eg I want to buy my nephew a game for his wii, but have no idea what ones he has/ what's cool/ what's appropriate. IME young children aren't very good at pretending to be happy with a duplicated/ unwanted gift, so I think better to spare the embarrassment all round!

My IL give us money- mainly because they don't know what to get, but also my MIL is main carer for my FIL and has enough on her plate.

It works quite well as I save it and use it for christmas and birthday presents for the children.
DS was 3 this year and he and I took some of his money to a toy shop and he got to choose something for himself, which he enjoyed.
He also knows we save most of the money (ILs are also ridiculously generous) and he has started saving money in his own piggy bank (bits of change we let him hav etc.), so it can be a good thing.

Thanks for your suggestions.
I did tell the mil that i could order the prezzies with her on internet or that i could go shopping with her another day but she insisted that she wanted to get them today!!! She doesn't work, has lots of free time and is always shopping so not sure what the hurry is.
DC's birthdays are all before christmas so they tend to get cash then so its nice for them to have prezzies for christmas.
DD a bit young to enjoy shopping just yet unfortantly. Hopefully she'll get money for her birthday that i can hide and buy her dream toy and wrap up for christmas... do you think thats wrong???
Also do you think its wrong if i use DS9's birthday money towards a DS? He would really like one as other DS got one for birthday and he loves it.I'v already got his main prezzie and he has £65 so don't know if i should add the rest? We're about hard up at the mo (as everyone else is) So could do without having to find an extra £50. Half of me wants to get it for him so i can tell everyone to get him games but half of me thinks its unfair to get two main prezzies. Also think they need to learn they can't have everything???

I don't think there'sanything wrong with yuor ideas. I put all the DC's money in one pot and use it evenly. I'm sure it will change when they are older and want to save/spend the money themselves, but until then I would do as you suggest- I often use christmas money to buy birthday presents- they get lotsof things at Christmas and won't notice!

this drives me potty - my MIL only has my 2 dds to buy for - and no money worries, you would really htink she would love it, originally i used to make suggestions, then i had to give her exact details of item , argos number etc, now she just gets me to buy the present and send her the bill. on the one hand she is very generous and i shouldn't complain but there are times when i want to say if you cannot be bothered to thiink of something, wrap it and send it to your only grandchildren well we don't want your presents . actually the last 2 years i have got them something from the their santa wishlist which i woudl have bought them anyway and thus saved myself the money and also put surplas into their bank accounts.