Please share the worst/totally useless christmas present you have ever had.

[PhantomOfTheChocolateCakeAvena]

I have an aunt who sends my mother a box (as in small) of biscuits to share between us all. As we all live in different parts of the country, this is quite hard. This is the same aunt who gave me 2 un-matching pillowcases.

A box of cards with cat photographs was the worst, they all had different poses and props. I really did want to vomit.

my friend once mentioned to her nan that she thought pigs were cute in some random conversational way and she is still getting pig ornaments and 'keepsakes' 5 years/5 xmases/5 birthdays/5 anniversaries later she has them in a box like an abatoir(sp?) massacre for crap very strange and obsessive looking but she now despises pigs and hasnt the heart to tell her nan
i make a point of expressing my love for all things designer/expensive it hasnt worked yet...

My db and his then wife gave my dm and I a joint present one christmas of.....

A block of wood with a marble in it

Thankfully presents are better since he got a new wife

MIL - 1 snake print g string without any packaging and tags and a crochet sparkly cardigan (would suit a 50yo not necessarily a 18yo) again not packaging or tags...

I have amazingly thick wavy hair that is difficult to manage. So last christmas my mother got me a set of voluminising hair products for fine hair

When I was a teenager she got me a giant teddy bear. I was dissapointed but said nothing - even when an Aunt mentioned how my mother had won it in a raffle.

My SIL's birthday is not long before Christmas and last year she got a pretty necklace from FIL who proudly explained "I walked in to this shop and asked what would be a good present for a young girl". She wore it on Christmas day, when she was given an identical necklace with the same explanation.

My mum ALWAYS buys crap presents, I would be here all day listing them to you, the highlights are:

Earings (really vile ones) when i don't have my ears pierced
A cellulite massagers (one for me and my two sisters), when I was 14!!!
A book on tracing your family history - why?? Most of us don't talk to each other the last thing we need is finding more about each other.

I know this is terrible but I always keep a big bag to put all the 'recyclable' presents in. Very good for the kids' Christmas fairs.

A sort of shiny-nylon-based zip up jacket with enormous pictures of leopards on it and, if I recall, it had some sort of black fringe/tassle detailing on it too. You have to see it to appreciate how bad it was.

MIL normally has excellent taste so I can only assume something went horribly wrong. I had to wear it of course whilst staying there that week. SIL couldnt stop laughing (a bit like having to wear those awful jumpers on Bridget Jones but this was more hideous and In Public).

Worst? A Cook All Day casserole dish thingy, without a plug. About 10 years after all new appliances came with plugs on

My MIL buys me a bottle of Bailey's every christmas without fail.......she has somehow got it into her head that I drink the stuff (I do, but only because she buys it for me at Christmas), and I'mm too scared polite to tell her otherwise.

Actually after 10 years, I'm starting to look forward to my yearly indulgence.

My ILs make lists mil asked for and got a collapsable washing line prop... typwriter correction tape
you can only imagine the 'fun' I have at Xmas with such a practical family

Remember back in the '80s when legwarmers were in? - all pink/lilac/pretty colours and you were meant to have them slouchy round your ankles a la Kids from Fame... So my friend's mum decided to get me some for Christmas. Only problem, they were:

• Navy
• About an inch thick, cable-knitted, woolly-jumper stylee
• So tight that if you managed to get them on at all, they would be like tubes up your legs, no chance of the slouchy-ankle look
• ...and given to me just as they were FINALLY starting to go out of fashion again!

haven't read the thread yet, but the worst present I have given (apparently) was a 50 year calendar to my 51 year old BIL

he is very difficult to buy for and I thought it was a novelty. I didn't realise he would be so offended that he couldn't say thank you.

(also gave him the Dangerous Book for Boys)

A double layer white shower hat from my MIL!