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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

50+ presents for each child?

73 replies

d1156075795531b003508 · 13/11/2008 21:07

I just logged onto another parenting website and someone posted they had bought >50 presents for each of their children. Substantial ones, not stocking fillers.

To my surprise loads of people responding admitted to buying the same amount, many more between 30-50.

I can't think of 50 things, let alone the amount of time it would take to open them all!!!

We're all a bit tight on Mumsnet

OP posts:
Yanda · 14/11/2008 18:43

I'm not really too sure why it matters so much what other people are buying their children for christmas, I mean its just as judgy as saying that someone who buys 2 presents is being stingy (which I don't think they are, but I think its the same judgyness). I don't believe a child is spoilt by a reciving over a certain number of presents, you could buy 100 things from a pound shop or you could buy a child single present worth £1000. A child is spoilt by not being taught to say thank you, by not being involved in the pleasure of gift giving to other people, by not being taught to share or to appreciate that some people may not be as fortunate whereas others are more fortunate.

janeite · 14/11/2008 20:01

I still think buying so much supports the creation of a materialistic, consumer driven society though, where kids value Christmas for how much "stuff" they get. DD1 is currently sulking because I've told her she can't have a new mobile phone; she has one; it works; it's fine. Our planet is falling to pieces and I don't want my children to feel that just because some people are acquisitive and assume we live in a "throwaway" society, that this is how it's okay for my children to be too. I love Christmas and want it to be special but it can be special with a pile of books and a few bits and pieces - there really is no need to go mad, however much, or little money you've got.

Marne · 14/11/2008 20:21

just because they get 50 presents it doesn't mean it cost £1000's.

My dd's will be getting a few (20ish) but i don't spend more than £100 max.

Presents include PJ'S, Pants, socks, books as well as a couple bigger things (playmobil etc).

I love wrapping them up, dd's will take alday to open them but that makes the day last longer. I suppose when they are older they will get less tat and just a couple good/exspencive gifts, at the momment they are happy with play-doh, colouring books and pj's.

I save all year for christmas so i don't get anything on credit.

Each to their own i say.

Horton · 14/11/2008 20:32

Good god. 50 presents? That does sound excessive to me.

I am not buying on credit and we are comfortably off, however my daughter will get one main present (a baby doll) and some minor presents (clothes for said doll plus a bed which was a charity shop find at £4 and a nappy changing kit for it), a small Playmobil pirate raft thingummy and some stocking presents. That little lot will come in at nearly £100. She will receive less than twenty separate items, I guess, including stocking stuff which will include bubble bath, clementine, socks, books etc. Personally, I think that's more than enough, especially considering that she will receive small presents from grandparents and uncles/aunts, too. She's two. This amount of stuff will be largesse beyond her wildest dreams to her. She doesn't need or even want more.

I can't imagine how anyone could really need 50 big presents. The things my DD is getting are all hopefully things she will like and play with for a long time to come or things that are useful. I don't want to raise a child who expects fifty presents. I'm delighted that I've got one who thinks a new toothbrush is a fun treat.

gillybean2 · 14/11/2008 21:04

I have a very large family so ds will get a lot of presents under the tree simply from family and friends.

His grammy alone probably sends around 20 presents, but these include clothes and small fun items. His favourite last year being a folding spoon that looked like a bug which is great for his lunch box and noone else has anything like it.

I do get him lots of things too, probably too much but that's my choice and I don't buy anything on credit ever. I save all year and buy stuff in the sale or BOGOF whenever I can. These include dvds, books, stickers, jigsaws which really aren't that expensive if you only go for bargains and special offers. I don't think of those as big presents though as nothing will cost more than a fiver, even for a dvd.

So yes, I'm afraid my ds is probably one of those children who will get around 50 presents under the tree. But they are not all from me and they are not all 'big' imo. He gets one main present which is from me, not Santa. Last year it was a digital camera.

Every year he gets to list 4 items on his letter to Santa. And every year he has asked for a sticker book and a jigsaw as two of those items. He will get more than the four he lists of course, but he knows there's only 4 he can choose and expect to get as Santa is busy and there are lots of children wanting gifts each year.

I do go a bit beserk on his stocking though. Hawkins Bazar, pound shop, bargain to be found in the supermarkets throughout the year if you keep your wits about you...

And when I look at the big expensive gifts available out there, I just remind myself of when he was 4 years old and he opened a present containing a green, star shaped, hot water bottle and he quite literally jumped up and down shouting with excitement. It cost santa all of £2 as I recall and he still takes it to bed with him on cold nights (he's now 9).

Everyone's opinion of what is a 'big' present or a lot of presents is different. I would say don't worry about what anyone else does, do what you and your family want, can afford and enjoy. If you get pleasure from giving your child a couple of gifts that they will love and use then do that. If you get pleasure from having a huge pile of tat (or not) under the tree then do that. We're all different and have different priorities and traditions. Don't be worrying about what someone on some other website says they do.

janeite · 14/11/2008 21:08

Lovely story about the hot water bottle. My dds did that over a bag of dried mango in their stockings a few years ago - strange children! But lovely too!

And every year dd2 asks for some felt tips and some chocolate! She is 11 now and even so, her current list only has four things on it. I think it is really sweet.

nancy75 · 14/11/2008 21:08

i buy loads of presents for my dd at christmas, we can aford it(because i save up) and i wont be going bankrupt after xmas because of it.
i think it is really horrible how so many of you judge this kind of thing.
imagine how many of you would get your knickers in a twist if a started a thread about how mean it is to ONLY buy your child x amount of presents/or i cant believe you ONLY spend x on your kids.

KatieDD · 14/11/2008 21:20

There have been a few of those too nancy 75
When you say you can afford to, by what definition, you say it won't bankrupt you but really could you not think of any savings/paying off the mortgage/something for yourself that the money would be better spent on ?
My biggest concern would be if you are buying 50 decent presents for a 5/6/7/8 year old what the hell are you going to buy when they are 18 ?
I feel it's about pacing yourself in terms of parenting and teaching kids the value of money.
I am looking forward to buying my daughters their first car for their 18th so whilst I could easily afford to spend £500 each on them, I won't because i know a car paid for, taxed and insured at that age will be worth so much more to them.

nancy75 · 14/11/2008 21:27

no, cant think of anything better than spending the money on my dd

KatieDD · 14/11/2008 21:28

Then spend it on her university education not future landfill tat that she'll have forgotten about in 6 months, I presume you have that base covered ?

nancy75 · 14/11/2008 21:30

katiedd, thanks for your concern yes i do have her future education covered

KatieDD · 14/11/2008 21:32

Oh I'm not concerned, could give a fuck to be honest

nancy75 · 14/11/2008 21:32

and this is exactly my point, if you said i am only buying x and i said ooh cant you make a few cutbacks and buy more i would be flamed, its nothing to do with anyone what other people buy or spend. i am not judging you please stop judging people like me.

janeite · 14/11/2008 21:32

That's a really good point actually Katie. Children don't need all this stuff but they will need the chance to study and for many of us, our wages will be enough to say they don't get any grant but not enough to comfortably support them. We've been saving since the girls were born; so they don't get piles of presents but they do both have a growing savings account.

And yes, absolutely, to teaching them the value of money.

KatieDD · 14/11/2008 21:36

Jane, the loveliest children I know are from a super rich family they have a beautiful home, delightful manners, the parents are millionaires several times over, there is nothing they couldn't buy for those children.
However they get a few nice gifts that they've asked for, a few surprises, stockings.
I think it's extremely chavvy and showy to be buying 50 plus whatever they are, clothes, whatever.
A decent pile yes, 50 plus is OTT
Just shows you can't buy class.

nancy75 · 14/11/2008 21:40

waht a lovely comment katie dd, considering your last post was along the line of "could give a fuck"
i have to agree you either have class or you dont.

janeite · 14/11/2008 21:44

My concern is that we can't buy another world when we fill this one with landfill - and 50 plus presents per child helps contribute to this situation.

A few things they want, a few nice surprises, some books and a stocking - perfect!

Jajas · 14/11/2008 22:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TeenyTinyTorya · 14/11/2008 22:42

Totally agree janeite. I've got almost all my presents from charity shops this year, I just don't buy into this whole consumerist furore around Christmas. In the end, it's originally a religious festival that's become highly commercialised, and we're all being convinced that we need to buy lots of stuff to make it "magical". I'm not at all religious, but I think the magical bit of Christmas is just the family atmosphere, the tree, lights, food etc. You don't need a lot of presents.

Horton · 14/11/2008 22:52

I agree too, janeite. By all means buy presents that will be appreciated and played with and loved for years and get surprises and books and useful things. But don't get 50 big presents. Nobody, nobody in the world needs that. It's just wasteful and ostentatious and horrid. As for only spending £X on your kids, I'd be delighted if I could have done it more cheaply. Why spend money just for the sake of it?

Loshad · 14/11/2008 22:55

Horrified at the 50+ presents/child idea, we are comfortably off but the dss get 1 or 2 main presents from us and a stocking - that's it. Really can't stand the rampant consumerism that is christmas these days.

KatieDD · 14/11/2008 23:08

You are so right Nancy, it was meant to read couldn't !

kaz69 · 21/11/2008 16:28

I saw this on the said website and actually the person who has posted about this is lying. I was one of those said people that buys their children around 50 presents.

BUT I did point out that this included clothes, toiletries, books, and allsorts of little thing's including little stocking bits. It really is not that much when you add it up.

IT was not 50 MAIN PRESEBTS!

We are well off and can afford it. Even if we couldn't what business is it of anyone else's. Unless you are all offering to give me money after xmas????? No I thought not!

Stop being so judgemental. We could all argue over many thing's but it is really not anyone's business is it.

karen

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