How can i make Christmas special this year?

[MadCreamLady]

I don't know, but i just never seem to get into the whole spirit of christmas thing. I enjoy the day, but its never really anything special in our house. There is a HUGE Dad shaped space where my Dad used to be, he died three years ago and i still miss him of course. Both he and my mum used to come round to dinner and it would be a nice day, never anything "special" or exciting in the way you read about big family get togethers and such like. So, of course, since he has been gone, and the year before that (he had alzheimers and was in a care home oblivious of the fact taht it was xmas ) it has just been my mum. She has always been a moody mare at xmas, but of course it just never feels right at all now. Honestly though, its not just that, we have NEVER done the whole big xmas thing, just had a nice dinner and watched TV. DD2 is three now, DD1 is 18 and has just moved back to my mums after splitting with her BF.

I would really love to have my ILs for the day actually, but they can't really get here - an hours journey and DP would then have to go and get them, then they would dither for another hour, then he would have to take them home..........probably before it got dark! So, thats not a runner really and they also have their other son and daughter with their family around on Xmas day - actually the more i think about it, the more i would actually quite like to have them - we don't have room for the rest of the family though and i can't mass cater The rest of the family is potentially five adults and five children, it just wouldnt be possible to wedge them all in.

I always try and do a decent table etc, but to be honest, i often wonder if i do it for myself really, not that my DP and mum don't appreciate it but they would be equally happy if i just cleared the table and didn't bother with fancying it up - by fancy i just mean a table cloth and place mats, oh and xmas crackers.

So, anyway - we have had a really tough few years, finances have been tight to say the least and DP has only just got a job in that will see us over the xmas in our house and not being repossesed - so that is something to celebrate of course

BUT HOW - how can i make christmas different this year?? TBH as much as i miss my Dad, i would probably still post in a similar vein, but i really enjoyed spoiling him....What im trying to say is, how can I really get everyone into the spirit of things...........

Oh..........having just re read that it all sounds a bit depressing. It wasn't meant to be

But really, what do i do - how to make it really special, we will actually have a small amount of money too (always a bonus) so any ideas warmly welcomed

So am i resigned to soggy sprouts and fecking Mr Kipling mince pies again then????

Whay about going out for Xmas dinnet?

We did that last year and liked it so much we are doing it again this year.

There has been fmily going on's and i am not spending Xmas with my mum/dad and brother and it won't feel the same.

Sorry about your dad xx

I have thought about that, but it is SO expensive and i think i might resent paying around £50 for a meal that potentially could be a bit crap on account of the numbers in resturant etc.

I think i still want to stay at home really - but how to make THAT special?

Erm dunno then,god i am useless eh lol

What about having friends or neighbours for drinks or nibbles in the evening? Or have something different from what you normally eat?

Tell everyone you want to make an effort to make it special this year. That way they are on warning!

Make the table look really Xmassy. Lots of candles. Xmas music on.

Invite some friends over for mulled wine and mince pies in the evening?

Do you all normally get dressed up etc? I would make that a rule this year. Make an effort with the table too.

You are in the perfect position to start creating the magic for DD2!

Try and see it through her eyes and get creating her memories..... sit and browse through the thread about '24 christmassy things to do' in this section - that will help you get in the mood and then have a kind of plan about what you can do on Christmas eve (e.g. a favourite meal + film and activities in the day and Christmas bath, pjs and a new book for DD2) and on Christmas day a lovely relaxed and easy time built around Christmas lunch (whatever time you do that), a walk to look at people's trees in the window, open presents, film, too much chocolate etc.

What do you think?

could you help out with an elderly christmas dinner somewhere? they are always looking for volunteers where i live, lots of people dont have family to go to at christmas time..

you could all maybe go and wander round and have a chat with some of the lovely people who dont have family to go to,,

age concern organise our one here... or help the aged

sorry if the is not appropiate...

I think the build up is the important bit, the meal is for the adults really.
I have booked a panto the week before, we have loads of am dram groups around here that are about a fiver each.

I know what you mean i sometimes think xmas day can be a bit flat once the dinner has gone!
I actually love the build up in the week before!
I never had stockings as a kid but we always get them for mine!
We hunt out the stocking and hang them up on the bedroom doors the week before!
Watch some xmassy movies do the reindeer food and the beels on xmas eve! Am going to do the felt on the door this year too gleaned from a thread on here!
Can you do something on the evening. We often have family round on an evening or neighbours that usually finishes the day off!
Agree with others though you have a wonderful opportunity to create a xmas for your lo's so grab it!

oooh what are 'beels' and 'the felt thing'??

oops bells i ring them outside dc door when they get on bed and then usually get a shout they have heard ! Works best after watching polar express!
The felt was from here where mnetters have put a piece of red felt on door , fireplace etc! For the morning after to go next to the half eaten mince pie glass of milk!

Well......................on my own head be it, I have just persuaded DP to invite his entire family round for boxing day I'm going to live to regret this i know!!! Will need to start a thread to ask what to serve on a boxing day buffet.

I thought about the xmas day thing, about what we do - we get up, open pressies, I start dinner, pick at chocolates etc, hit the bottle (well its xmas!) while i peel sprouts and listen to radio two carols. Have my mum round for dinner, and go to see my dad and take up a wreath, either before or after dinner. Play with DD, put her up to bed - chill out. I tried to think of something else i'd rather do but i coudln't imagine being anywhere or doing anything else really.

Its just that i always have a sense of not having "made the most" of things and its a bit of an anti climax - We always used to go to inlaws for boxing day but for the past two years we haven't MIL was ill last year, and i can't remember why we didn't go the year before.

So, a boxing day anti-anti-climax buffet it is. IF they want to come that is!!! I don't want to go to them this year because the whole family descends on them, including lots of children and they are run off their feet, they are not in the best of health and i think it takes the piss personally.