I want to go away next Christmas and do no planning, no shopping, no stress

[Florally]

It wasn’t a bad Christmas, in fact, all pics, experiences and reviews from attendees would probably say it was a great Christmas.

But I’m so tired, I kind of don’t see the point. Spending thousands of pounds (I would imagine if I added it up) and a hamster wheel of cooking, clearing, dishwasher, dishwasher, dishwasher, tidying, start again for dessert, start again for tea.

I just want to go somewhere where they make Christmas dinner and maybe there’s some entertainment or something in the evening.

Everyone is against this of course 😂

Am I wrong?

It’s all a bit ‘what’s the point’ isn’t it?

Today was my first day doing (almost) nothing. No guests, no plans. I am exhausted after the last week, so I stayed in bed until 10ish then had a very long shower. I set a ham on slow cook and went for a walk with the dog. Pottered about this afternoon then binge-watched some tv. I made it clear to DP & DS that I did really need a rest after all the merry go round of shopping, cooking & clearing up. I am my own worst enemy because I do everything from scratch and I like everything just so. I have suggested we go out every day from 23rd to 31st next year, I might even hold myself to it!

Could you possibly introduce alternate years when you have a low key family with just the four of you followed by one with your in-laws every second, or even third year?

I think you would be very justified in saying around Easter time or after the summer holidays; I’m just giving you early notice that because my job is very stressful currently, I won’t be hosting Christmas this year. I hope you understand.

I am with you OP. Weeks of buying and prep. Cleaning house, up at stupid o’ clock to get it all started. Everyone arrives, tucks in (and would never know just how much work had gone in to it) Meanwhile you are just too jaded/over it to enjoy yours. Dishwasher churning for hours, and still seem to be clearing and putting away for days after. Ugh - no more for me!

Yanbu
It’s usually the person who has to prep, organise, buy, host etc who wants to go away. I suggested going away to my family one year. DH ds dd all horrified! I think DH has finally come to understand what kind of input is needed to make bloody Christmas happen so he is onboard for the future. We have dog tho and wouldn’t leave him.

We used to do this regularly every Christmas and over New Year if possible, mostly to the Canaries and in even earlier times we went much further afield, ie Goa, Mexico and twice even to Barbados but Covid abruptly put a stop to it, then more serious ill health followed and although every year we have discussed the possibility of renewing what used to be a very enjoyable experience once we actually begin looking seriously into what would be possible the cons far outweighed the pros! 🙄
We're now in our mid 70's and apart from the actual prices of most of the holidays being around three times for one person the equivalent of what we used to pay for two, 😕 travel insurance for our age and medical conditions is now insanely expensive as we have heard from friends car hire abroad has also doubled if not trebled in price plus you need all sorts of paper work that we never had to bother with! We worked out roughly that 2 weeks in the Canaries over Christmas would set us back, with spending money and incidentals approx £5,000 which I simply cannot justify! 🤔
That's all before you even consider the nightmare that is a British airport at school holiday times and the much greater chance that your flight or even your entire holiday will be cancelled at the last minute! 😱

The Christmas I spent away once in my life was the best, luxury hotel, secret Santa with a financial cap and suggestions! Ideal !

Of course 'everyone' is against it if you do 95% of the work (and probably expense).

From.now on 'everyone' takes responsibility for a day, or half day, depending on numbers, of the traditional xmas. Food (shopping, prep AND clearing up), activities etc.

And don't bail them out. If they.let others down, then let them. Provide beans on toast and make everyone to wash up after themselves.

Alternatively book yourself somewhere and just go. Ignore 'everyone' complaining

Or they’ll invite themselves to join you .

Done it 3 times now. Money prohibits any more but I'd do it every year if possible.

We went to Tenerife a couple of years ago. It was great! But are you doing all of the cooking and clearing up yourself, and spending thousands of £££? If no one wants to go away, tell them they are doing next Christmas ( unless you are talking about several toddlers and just you!)

Love this!!

We often go away- mid priced cottage at the coast. My family don’t all want to come and they are all self sufficient anyway, so they totally understand. I still send gifts, and invite people if they want to come for a couple of nights. We don’t do the big Xmas dinners etc while away. It’s great. Try it!!!

We were in a different EU capital last year - stayed in an apartment so cooked for ourselves but it was lovely and relaxed. Bakeries open Christmas morning for pastries. City centre very quiet on 24th but busy on 25th and lots of restaurants etc open. And no pressure to visit or be home for visitors from others.

we had hoped to do it again this year but DD is unwell so couldn’t travel. But we may well do it again next year, if she’s recovered, as we will still have access to that apartment, or go to a different place to do similar.

I am so with you (all)! My family too would report back a lovely Christmas and generally it was even with the following stuff going 'wrong':

Oven blew half way through cooking the potatoes (before we started the meat!) so had to transfer the rest of the cooking to a friend's house - 15 mins away.
The oil tank ran out of oil on actual Christmas Day - so no heating or hot water and a house full of guests and that was after we 'invested' in smart reader with the oil company so they can keep us topped up!
I scraped the car (whilst taking the food to friends) after my DD decided to have an emotional melt down and wound me up so much that I hit the small wall that I always know how to miss.
The present that my DH bought me that I requested - was personalised but I choose Arabic as the font and confusingly the engraving now reads right to left - now commemorating a date that has no meaning! (keeping it as hey ho!)
Therefore Boxing Day was spent with my DH buying and installing a new oven and driving 2 hours to find an oil supplier where we could buy some cans of the stuff for heating for a dew days!

Anyway ... our 'kids' are mostly in their 20s (one still a teenager) and I think it is time to have a different Christmas for few years (read - less stress / preparation / expectations and sheer volume of hospitality) before grandchildren arrive and no doubt the Christmases that they have grown up with will be back on the cards!

I’ve just said to my husband that I want to go away next year and not do any Christmas stuff at all. He wasn’t happy about it, of course. I’ve done the work while he’s soaked it all up and had an extended break. He loves Christmas. He wouldn’t love it if he had to do everything.

I’m the same as you. Our friends have been away in Goa for the last 3 weeks I keep getting messages saying how hot and sunny, great food and drink, no housework just one long holiday. I would love this but I have a 93 year old Dad to care for and grandchildren who we love to see so it’s not going to happen soon

This thread is so annoying. Just go away if you want to! So what if other people will complain or expect you to host? How about you stop putting everyone else before yourself and just do what you want.

Nothing is mid priced at Xmas. Prices double.

Like another poster upthread said it's not necessarily so easy once you are in your dotage if you want to go somewhere with nice warm weather. High possibility of catching something just before, during or just after given all the flu that's going around. Don't fancy being in a plane with the potential bugs and possibly being ill on the holiday after spending so much money.

Travel insurance potentially difficult or impossible to get if you have a lot of medical conditions.

It sounds a lovely idea but logistically it's not an option for us now. It might have been possible 20 years ago but we didn't have the money then.

We are staying in a nice but not stupidly expensive hotel. It’s definitely full but doesn’t feel stressed at all. It’s lovely

Prices can be high but what we do is not go for crazy luxury. Just something simple that will take the dog. The wind in our hair is more important.

What’s the weather like during the day? Temperature? Sounds amazing.

Yes me too! And I’ve already booked it and planned it! Do it, gives you something to look forward to and you should get good rates booking so early

Me and my husband have hosted Xmas day for all the family for the last 25 years.
After suffering a brain aneurysm last year we went away for Xmas this year.
No cooking, washing up, fetching an carrying. It was bliss.

We spent Christmas in Morocco one year, I loved it! Christmas eve was a bigger thing than Christmas day, but was all really chilled, took a couple of presents and opened the rest at home. Haven't done it again because the people in my house who do nothing at Christmas said it wasn't the same as being at home (ie me doing all the work 🤣) 100% recommend it though