I was hosting Christmas this year.

[Mar256]

I’m hosting Christmas this year and my little girl has been poorly with norovirus. She is literally getting over it and is back eating etc. My sister, her partner, 2 kids and my parents were coming. My sister messaged me this morning saying I’m not coming I don’t want my kids catching it etc. Now, I’ve been cleaning the house constant wiping everything down etc. I’m annoyed because I’ve been out and bought stuff for Christmas Day. Kids get poorly you can’t prevent that. But my daughter is literally getting over it and we’re on Sunday!! I just don’t have the energy to even host Christmas Day now for my parents. I’m annoyed and upset and she knows I am. Putting so much time and effort into Christmas Day and she wasn’t even coming originally it was just my parents and she asked about 6 months ago and I said yeah so all the kids could play together. Won’t be doing that again in a hurry.

would you cancel 4 days before Christmas even if someone’s child has gotten over a sickness bug?

Agree that unless you have a diagnosis you slightly created this by calling it norovirus.

If it were me I’d cancel the whole thing and ask your parents to go to your sister.

No guarantee you won’t get it over the next few days.

See them both after Christmas.

I think your DS is in a difficult position, and I think cancelling was the right thing to do. She could "wait and see" if anyone else in your family goes down with it, but that might mean you/her cancelling last minute. At least 4 days in advance she has time to shop and prepare for a family Christmas in her own home. I think you're being pretty selfish tbh.

48 hours from last symptom. Op said "getting over it", not "gotten." I'm assuming the dd still has it?

'You're contagious with norovirus from the moment you start feeling sick and remain so for at least 48 hours after symptoms stop, but can still shed the virus and spread it for up to two weeks, or even longer, after you feel better, so staying home and avoiding food prep for 2 days post-symptoms is key.'

Op imho YABU.

How horribly controlling! She's said she's not coming and that's the end of the matter. It's perfectly reasonable not to want to put your family at risk of a nasty virus over Christmas, and the risk assessment is up to OPs sister, not OP.

This.

I would be delighted to not host.

Also, this may not be the case with your sister, but I have 5 autoimmune conditions and a clinically medically vulnerable DS. I am super super cautious about exposing either of us to things if it can be avoided.

I would have been tempted to make the same decision your sister has, OP, i’m sorry. Sickness bugs are the absolute worst.

Could you push your family day back a week and have a quieter day on the 25th? You sound worn out anyway so maybe this could be a blessing in disguise.

Sorry, I know it's annoying, but if I found out you had norovirus in the household then I'd be cancelling too. I'm glad your DD is on the mend, and it's great that you have been cleaning everything, but it's so infectious that the chances are someone else in your household is going to come down with it. I wouldn't be visiting you until you were a couple of weeks clear from it.

Exactly and the sister may need to buy things for dinner before festive items run out. In uncertain situations like this, it is best just to cancel.

You are your partner may still come down with it. Although it does seem an over reaction I see her point. Look on the bright side its far less work for you on Christmas day which means you can relax and enjoy it more.

I'm hosting, my grandson was sick early hours of Saturday a few times. Dd won't bring him here before Thursday by which time he should hopefully be over it as he hasn't been sick since. If I were your sister I would cancel too tbh to avoid myself and my family picking it up but I'm maybe over cautious around sickness bugs likely why we haven't had one here for years.

It does say online that Norovirus infected person can remain infectious for up to 2 weeks after the symptoms stop.

I’d be surprised if it was norovirus if the rest of you haven’t caught it. Did it have the ‘smell’ (you can smell norovirus a mile off)

You and any other members of your household will almost certainly be incubating the virus right now! Around 2 weeks from when your daughter first got sick, you’ll get sick. Your Sister is being sensible.

I would be cancelling too.

We had norovirus which started with my toddler, and ripped through me and my husband over the next couple of days. It was horrendous.
Two weeks later, fully recovered, we went on holiday with my parents just grateful we’d had it early enough it hadn’t ruined our holiday, 3 days in and both my parents came down with it and were horrendously ill.
Im not particularly cautious about bugs but it ha made me more wary because we’d been recovered for so long and all our packed stuff had been washed etc. of course they could have got it elsewhere but the coincidence is enough to have made us all nervous.

I understand you being upset but yes I would cancel tbh, I’ve had it twice this year and it’s horrific. It stays on surfaces for two weeks or more, I wouldn’t be able to have a good time knowing we could all be struck down at any minute.

erm….what?!!

I can see both yours and DSis pov. I would be upset at changed plans when I’ve planned my hosting, and I’d be wary that the rest of the house will come down with it, so would prefer to make a decision earlier rather than wait for that possibility. It’s a shit situation that’s nobody’s fault, just one of these things.

Is noro the same as gastro? That can definitely hang around and the next person come down with it 3 days later… I’d be very nervous. I just don’t have time to be ill like that with 3 kids and it’s so endless the kids being sick. I don’t cancel all the time so I’d hope my sibling would understand!

Well if she cancels when someone has the sniffles there was no way she was going to come once you told her someone in the house had norovirus!
Was you child actually tested for Noro? If not you ve probably just exacerbated the situation by labelling a stomach bug as something that severe, it makes a lot of people anxious

But norovirus is a sickness bug. And it's actually the most common one. There's rotavirus as well, but that's less prevalent as you can build immunity to that.

But there's no real way of distinguishing between the two.

No, but it's by far the most common.

Norovirus is by far the most common D&V bug, particularly at this time of year.

And you're specifically told not to visit the GP with symptoms, so it's not something that is routinely diagnosed.

Curious if anyone else became ill OP?