Worried about dc main Xmas present. Vr headset

[IbetItIsnt]

My dc aged 9&11 both have asked for a vr headset for Xmas to share. I was reluctant but dp found one on sale and got them it. I’ve now been reading about the dangers of them and now worrying.

I know it is possible to see what they are doing by casting to my phone so I can keep a close eye on that. I am more worried about health effects. I’ve read it can cause vision problems and even seizures.

Why on earth didn’t we research this beforehand! I’m so mad at myself.

I can’t return it as it’s been set up. Can’t risk selling it before Xmas to get money for something else. It’s not enough time.

Ive messed up big time and feel so sad.

What would you do?
I could just get rid of it which means no main present for either dc. Or keep it and let them try it for 10 minutes. I know every time they use it I will be worried.

Sounds like an extreme response.
And Seizures wouldnt be my first concern tbh.

It is a meta quest?

I wouldnt like it either. My main issues would be the cost of the games and that its such a solitary activity annnnd that I would have the hassle of enforcing time limits.

If you know its a mistake / they are too young, i reckon sell it and use overdraft if needed to buy something else.

If you sell it your DH can never ever tell them one was bought

Do you believe your children may have PSE? If not, then I really wouldn’t stress. As for vision issues, it’s not been shown to have any adverse permanent effects in adults (sure, temporary stuff, but nothing different really to serious gamers without VR’s), and it’s unknown in children. I’d just ensure they use it sensibly. Not being in for long stretches, having long breaks in-between with exposure to natural light etc. It's really the way of the future, I wouldn’t be too adverse to it.

I tried my friends sons and it made me feel sick and gave me a stonking migraine.
Lots of kids use them with no issues though.
Maybe just put restrictions on length of useage?

If I keep it they will only be using it 10 minutes a time with many hours break. I’ve spent all this money now hoping they won’t have interest in it after Xmas day. I’ve been such an idiot.

Gently, this seems like an overreaction, and you sound very anxious. We got one when my kids were younger teen DC and set it up so that it cast to the TV, so everyone could see what the person playing could see. I can't think of one time when anyone played it alone, mostly because of the risk of the person playing walking into a wall or bashing through the patio doors. We mostly had fun family times using it and the novelty wore off fairly quickly.

I got one for my last birthday (62) and bloody love it! It's fab for exercising (Fit XR) and piano practice.

same scenario for me last Christmas my ds (10) ! Tbh we all tried it quite novel and fun. He plays on it in earshot of me. I allow him an hour at a time it sometimes it sneaks over . No adverse reactions and after Christmas it barely left the box for months as the novelty wore off. He’s started playing again recently as school friends now have them but even now it’s not
being a problem. His face gets red and the strap can mark there face temporarily if playing a while. No issues elsewhere. Keep an eye as they can go into games and converse with people all over the world . He has made friends with kids in America . I am very cautious of this and I listen to every word it helps that he shouts every word 😂. Anything I’m not happy about I tell him and he removes himself . I totally understand your fear but don’t panic and try playing it with them it’s fun. Let them enjoy and after Christmas put some rules into play that work for them and for your peace of mind . I hope you have a lovely Christmas Op .

Thank you, I’m pleased to hear there can be positive experiences. I am very anxious generally and after reading horror stories it has made me very worried. My anxiety has got the better of me on this one.

I think at this late stage I will give them the vr, limit the usage to 10 minutes a time whilst casting to the tv. We will use it as a family. If I notice any ill effects I will encourage them to sell the device and they can purchase a new gift in exchange.

I don’t want my anxieties to ruin Xmas but also their health and wellbeing is of course top priority.

Kindly, 10 minutes isn’t long enough to enjoy a game.
my son got one last year (he’s 13 though) and absolutely loves it.
The battery life is quite short so it’s self limiting as he has to take a break while it charges.

It's unfair to gift them something with such extreme limits on it's use.

If you're serious about limiting it to 10 minutes at a time, then I would suggest returning it and getting them another present.

My grandson had one. First time using it and it made him very nauseous, he described it as like travel sickness. He tried again and it gave him vertigo! So ds sold it. Hes prone to travel sickness so maybe it’s connected though

Op you need to relax on this. It is just a game which they’ll either love or won’t. If they love it, let them play and enjoy! Don’t cover them with restrictions and spoil their fun. If they don’t enjoy it then you win.

Ront spoil your children’s Christmas for your own unwarranted anxiety

The time they use it for will be limited as they are sharing - a game of beat sabre, swap over, another shot. There are things I like to do on it (the maps!) but I do find it uncomfortable so don't use it for long. Keep it in a communal room - you'll need to for the space anyway

I'm sure they will be fine! We had one and i can see how it would be really fun, but just made me motion sick 😬 if you're going to give it, they have to be able to use it for more than 10 minutes

Massive over reaction OP.
My boys are 13 but got one 3-4 years ago. At the time I did restrict it to around 20-30 mins play but as they have got older now that has increased.
its not solitary. You can link up with friends. My two have had some very fun times playing with friends on there. It’s been used a lot and was a very good value for money toy.

The only thing I would say be a bit wary of is other (unknown) kids in some multiplayer games but as long as you keep it in a communal space where you can listen in, it’s all good.

Also, loads of cool family games to try on there. Adults will feel sick at first. But the trick is to only have a few mins and then just keep trying it over a few days. Once your brain gets used to it the sickness goes away.

My child (10 when the VR arrived) very quickly learnt to regulate the time as it made them dizzy/headache. Now a year or so later they're up to about 30 mins a session but always stop of their own accord.

Beware of the game with gorillas (as it's open and other kids playing swear a lot!) but do have a go yourself - defending your own living room from fluffy aliens is quite fun!

I would be worried about the vision problems, it’s something we’ve looked into as we have a VR headset (that we got for us parents), and we won’t be letting our DCs use it until age 12 for this reason. At younger ages their eyes are still developing quickly and it can cause long term issues. It may not when only using for short periods of time but vision isn’t something you want to risk so I wouldn’t at these ages.

Could you perhaps ‘rebrand’ the present so instead of a main present for them, it could be a family present. Maybe even a Boxing Day family present if you already have lots of stuff going on Christmas Day! Then it would be easier to all play together in the living room, everyone can take turns and they wouldn’t feel you were limiting ‘their’ time, because everyone has to have a turn and then it will run out of batteries 😁

Do people not know that these headsets are not for use by under 13s? There is a minimum age for a reason. My son has one but he's sixteen, I would never have given it to him at nine.