Something nice to do or bring for SIL Xmas dinner

[DrivingGnomeForChrismas]

SIL is doing a Xmas dinner early this year. She’s had a tough year and is a single mum. She’s really thoughtful and often goes above and beyond for our DC. I love my DN but often my brain is just not in gear enough to go above and beyond with little things and Ive had quite a year myself, but always organise gifts they want for birthdays and Christmas.

Ive asked her if there’s anything I can do or bring on the day but she said not to worry. I don’t want to turn up empty handed (other than presents of course), because like I said she always does the little things for DC and I want her to know she’s appreciated. I’d feel a little like we’re taking her for granted if we just turn up eat her food and leave without doing or bringing something.

Any ideas? What would you appreciate if it was you hosting?

Some flowers and her favourite bottle of drink

Flowers are a great idea, thanks! She doesn’t drink though

I would take flowers and chocolate or flowers and a nice candle.

Cashmere gloves?

If you bring flowers have them already in a vase. She will really appreciate that.

Posh hot chocolate? I was given knoops chocolate flakes and they are delicious. Then she can curl up with a hot chocolate once everyone has gone.

If you take flowers get an arrangement.
A nice christmas display.
Nobody needs a bunch of flowers shoved af them when they're cooking.

Can you offer a play afternoonp at some stage? As a single parent she probably craves time.

It’s bloody expensive so I’d offer to bring pudding or a cheese course and ask what she’d prefer or if she still says no, I’d give her a £100 supermarket voucher to cover your costs/say thank you

Don't take anything that needs "dealing with" that day.
So, absolutely don't turn up with a massive box of raw prawns, when food is sorted, fridge is packed, and freezer is full. Yes, I'm talking from experience.

Book? Candle? Chocolates? Planted flower arrangement? Whatever soft drink she likes.

Does she live near enough for you to babysit?
Gift vouchers for cinema and promise to babysit?

Lovely luxury bubble bath / bath oil?

A stack of good paperbacks

Get her ur normal present and then get her some things just for her. Mums are usually the ones that end up with one half arsed present while the kids gets piles and piles. Go a bit ott on her and get her a nice book, a gift voucher, the classy hot choc from another pp is a fab idea, stuff that is just personal that she doesn’t have to share with anyone. Bring an extra dessert and some cheese and grapes.

Poster crackers than she’d usually buy?

Take whatever you and your family would want to drink on the day and some more expensive than usual soft drinks for her - Fevertree do some refreshing sounding bottles

I’d definitely offer to make a dish and a desert, along with a voucher for somewhere she likes.

Some really lovely ideas here, thank you everyone!

My thoughts were exactly that I didn’t want to bring anything that would be additional work to do or have to handle.

We don’t live close enough to babysit unless we make a whole day of it and we have a new baby as well as young DC. Hence I’ve offered to bring food but our own Xmas is basically a frozen feast as I’m trying not to overwhelm myself either.

I love the ideas suggested though and I did say to DH maybe we should get her some fancy stuff she wouldn’t spend money on herself but might appreciate. So thank you for the specific suggestions, it’s helped narrow down what to get.

We wondered about vouchers as DH has often offered cash help but she often declines. But then it’s hard to know what to get vouchers for as unsure where she shops. All her resources go to DN now and I really wanted her to feel seen and appreciated.