HELP! Gift Dilemma for Mum

[MamainWonderland]

I need some wise Mumsnetter help finding some small Christmas gifts for my mum (in her 70s). My dad died some years ago and she lives alone, so travels to spend every Christmas with us (we have children with SEND who don't travel, so this works well). I don't have any siblings.

She is rather difficult to buy for, so in desperation this year, I have bought her tickets to a show (approved by her), so that she and I can have a nice trip out on Christmas Eve. These were fairly expensive and ate a chunk of my budget. I'm firmly of the belief that experiences are much more valuable than things at most ages anyway, but the problem lies on Christmas morning. Because she is widowed and has a very small family, it is likely that she won't have anything other than what we give her to open on Christmas morning. I've spent a chunk of the budget on the show tickets, but I really need some ideas for small, cost-effective gifts for her to unwrap on Christmas morning.

Now here lies the problem: she doesn't wear make up or use skincare/haircare, she can't wear jewellery (allergies) and is currently dieting so has requested no sweets. I'll find a thriller paperback, but otherwise I am TOTALLY STUMPED. What on earth do I buy? She isn't a candle/diffuser type of person either. In her younger years she probably would have preferred a screwdriver set honestly 😂, but she has a variety of health conditions that keep her fairly sedentary. PLEASE HELP WISE ELVES OF MUMSNET!

Hmm does she do any crafting or gardening? Any other hobbies?
If she's into her thrillers you could maybe get her one of those murder mystery sets where you try to solve it yourself.
Otherwise: scarf, gloves, purse, socks, bath stuff if she likes a bath maybe?

Something with or about her grandchildren might work:
A framed photo of your kids?
pottery painted by your kids for her?

or, more generally:
a bud vase
some nice bath/ shower stuff/ handmade soap
Turtle dove hand warmers for cold weather
a new hot water bottle
a personalised bookmark

Thank you! Definitely no gardening - hah - that was my lovely dad's side of things and she has hated taking it over (has a gardener now to keep things under control). I did buy her one of those 'escape room' style games last year - in the hope that she'd do it with me over Christmas - but she packed it up, took it home to do with her friends and I'd bet good money that it hasn't seen the light of day.

The crafting idea is definitely up her alley - she has her whole second bedroom dedicated to sewing and knitting. I'll have a think on that, but I suspect she probably already has everything!

I think as she has got older and my dad died, her world has narrowed a lot and while she reads and watches TV, that is about the extent of her activity. That's why I went for the show tickets as the main present - but boy is it tough to think of some nice stocking filler ideas! She does like a nice shower gel....I think my main problem is thinking of a variety of suitable ideas so she has a few things to open - aargh!

Now there's an idea - I can definitely rustle up a picture of the children looking festive. Thank you!

I bought her an electric blanket last year (this is how desperate I've been getting - haha), so some other heat-related item is a good idea. Establish a theme...

How about a soft scarf, embroidery kit, some liberty squares of fabric, definitely a nice shower gel. Decent sewing scissors.

Herbal teas? I use a lot of them when dieting.
small water bottle, mini power bank, new travel cup, an umbrella?

I usually put all of us socks and bath sponges in a stocking, they are very popular and we all are over 18 (DH and I are well over 🙂)

Go traditional

• hyacinth in a pot
• mini Christmas stocking with satsuma, choc money (mandatory). Fill with little things wrapped in twisted tissue paper, eg, emery boards, tinted lip balm, pocket tissues, nice pen etc etc.

Otherwise Lands End have cashmere lined leather touchscreen gloves on sale for £45.

https://www.johnlewis.com/this-works-seventh-heaven-mini-deep-sleep-pillow-spray-bodycare-gift-set-7-x-5ml/p113846565

these are a nice little gift set without being skincare/beauty.

brooch for her coat?

If you want to carry on the heated theme how about an electric hot water bottle?

I give all my adult family members a voucher from a shop which they choose, a decent amount that they can then use to buy something they want. I then get them all a token present to open on Christmas Day. For the ladies, this might be slippers, fancy socks, little purse, key ring, scarf, tote bag, decent pen, umbrella, gloves or food items like spicy oils for cooking, chutneys, pickles etc. I know you said your mum is on a diet but these things are eaten in moderation to season meals so are great for a diet plan.

This year none of my gifts would be suitable though, the ladies are getting reed diffusers and the men are getting Green and Black chocolate sets. I was in a rush to sort out presents as I’m having surgery on the 16th December so need to get everything wrapped before then.

The RHS x Liberty have some lovely cross stitch kits that are about £8. As a sewer/knitter I have loved doing them.

How about a make your own pincushion, sewing pouch or needle case kit if she does anything crafty involving sewing? There are some lovely ones by Corrine Lapierre at £12-ish.

My sister always does calendars with lots of pictures of the kids for all the grandparents. In the past we have done a family portrait type thing (pretty painful on the day but the result is good) and we have given lots of photo frames, school pics etc.

Otherwise, fall back is replacing what they already have, new dressing gown, slippers etc if she is around the house a lot. New purse, key rings (you can do something with the kids pics) etc.

I got my dad’s partner a theatre voucher as she likes going with her mum and that way she could choose what she wanted to see and it was valid for a year. She was chuffed with that. For her birthday my sister and I clubbed together to get her a voucher for a garden and nursery nearby where you can do a morning or afternoon plant course or just buy plants that she might want. She loved that too.

How about a bulb kit from M&S or similar that she can plant herself and keep on her kitchen windowsill ( hyacinths or something similar) think of you all when they bloom .
luxury tea
good leather gloves
heated throw
flower subscription for 3 months

What about something related to the show you are going to see?

Like a programme you can secretly buy and wrap so that she can look at it afterwards to remind her of the show?

Or a book about the show or a piece of merchandise from it like a mug or item of clothing?

How about a book nook. I think these look ace. I think they are quite fiddly though but might be interesting to her if she enjoys crafts. There are different types

I've found grandchild related things to be the most successful gifts. Calendar, photo frame with pictures, photo book if you have the energy to collate.

Consumables don't have to be sweets. Does she like tea, or coffee? Something like a tea selection box or sample of different coffees could work, or alcohol if she drinks.

Warm cosy woolly lined cabin socks. QVC do some good ones.

A calendar with selected photos of you all through the years, we ordered one of these online for my mum when she was alive, she treasured it.

A hamper filled with treats, jams, biscuits, relishes, all your mums favourites.
You can decorate a box to put them in, so it doesn't have to be expensive.

make up a gift basket to include a nice mug with a hot chocolate sachet and a mini baileys, some cosy socks, hand cream, book or puzzle book and some fancy chocolates

A few days ago I saw a lovely pair of leather gloves lined with cashmere. They would be very warm I think .

A puzzle book or a magazine subscription perhaps?

Things I've bought my MIL previously that's been well received

Diary
Calendar
Hand cream
Perfume (nice ones, not too expensive from M&S/Next)
Warmie (microwave water bottle thing)
Slippers
Glasses case
Jigsaw
New Cardigan

Does she wear nail varnish/nail file? or a voucher to get nails done?

I like sewing and was delighted when DH bought me a magnifying, daylight, floor lamp like this. I expect Amazon has some to choose from as well.

www.hobbycraft.co.uk/purelite-4-in-1-crafters-magnifying-lamp/5915221000.html?glCountry=GB&store=&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20493709630&gbraid=0AAAAADnvm3LVKcpplkM2d89JNr65nN71D&gclid=CjwKCAiA8vXIBhAtEiwAf3B-g7eEM46tipxB1SxMImd66Xk9_-RCkpEvXK0hF-sPK3ZzK7CLzvRTVhoCs5YQAvD_BwE

Does she like coffee? My DB is notoriously difficult to buy for and I got him a coffee subscription which went down well. Also a national trust membership one year which was another success.

My MIL is also difficult to buy for and I got her some fur lined crocs last year which she lives in.