How to handle husband working xmas day

[Stuckinside]

So as the title suggests my husband has to work xmas day - despite his boss refusing to do any of the festive period (another story). I have a 5 and 10 year old and am trying to figure out how to do xmas day on boxing day without them realising, more specifically our older child. They love to track santa on Xmas eve which is going to make it difficult, so I'm open to any suggestions. I was going to add another chocolate into their advent calenders and do another day for the elf.... But I don't know how to ensure the day is seamless.....and don't want my older child to have the magic spoilt. Those who also work xmas day with children, how do you manage it? Thank you

I’ve worked a fair few Christmas and we just have 2 Christmas days. Kids love it. So on Christmas morning your husband will be there to open presents. When I’m working we don’t do big sit down Christmas dinner, we have a buffet tea ready for when I get in (which the kids prefer anyway) and their day is still fun without me with all their presents to keep them occupied. on Boxing Day Santa brings another present if I’ve worked Christmas Day to say thank you to the kids for understanding that some mums and dads have to work (and a present for mum for working!) then we do Christmas dinner / family thing Boxing Day instead. To be honest I think the kids like it when I work they get double the Christmas Day fun!

You can’t change Christmas Day. You’ll be up at 6 anyway to open presents, have festive hot chocolate or something, then you could have turkey and the works ready for when he gets back after 5 (which would be my plan) or a festive tea when he comes back, and full Christmas meal on Boxing Day.

Good grief when we were kids all the presents were done and dusted by the time Dad went to work at 7.30🤣

I imagine at these ages they will both be up mega early. Why not let them open, at least main presents with you and dad, then you and the kids can have a nice day together playing with their new toys. Have something they like for lunch and make a nice supper for you all in the evening when dh gets back. Boxing Day you can go all out as if it’s Christmas Day again, maybe keep a couple of presents back for the kids to open and you and dh open yours together. Win win for you all.

sorry but you are being silly. Your husband is working during Christmas Day, he is not away the whole Christmas holiday. There are plenty of hours to do things as a four, and you will be able to have a lovely day as a 3.

Just get up early do presents be a bit sad dad is working, say bye to dad then just have the day to yourselves my dh used to work Christmas days it isn't great but its fine, it is a bit daft to try and move it when your children are aware.

Presents are opened before he goes to work. The children get all day to play with their presents, do whatever they like, you eat your main meal when husband comes home. It might be different to what you're used to, but it really could be a nice, chilled Christmas Day! You could also pick a Christmas film to watch to split the day up a little bit, or go out for a walk/bike ride.

It can still be a brilliant day!

My mum used to work Christmas Day a lot as she was a nurse, and we just made the best of it, and worked around it, even if timings weren't what we usually would have picked.

@Stuckinside- hopefully some of these suggestions have been helpful to you?
I find it can be helpful to hear of others who also have to work.

Dear me, the drama people make over a parent having to work at Christmas! It's built up to such a silly extent, people have such unrealistic expectations. Lots of families have one or both parents working or on call over the holidays. Emergency services. Care workers. Highways staff. Petrol station attendants. Coastguard. DH used to do mountain rescue and has had to go out on Christmas Day before to rescue a few numpties who got lost in the hills. Idk what your DH does, but I'm sure if it's an essential sort of job, it could be turned into assisting Santa in some way for the younger one!

Don't make more of it than it needs to be, and the kids will crack on and enjoy the day either side of their dad's work shift.

My husband often works Christmas Day (either nights or days - 12 hour shifts from 6-6). We used to write to Father Christmas to explain the situation and magically Christmas Day was changed just for us. Sometimes we had Christmas earlier, sometimes on Boxing Day. Other Christmas days we started our Festive celebrations at 6pm with cocktails and canapés and then straight to mains. Don’t overthink it, just do what works for your family. Due to the change of date, some actual Christmas days I’ve been able to volunteer to deliver meals to elderly people and others we popped on Christmas PJs and watched movies and ate pizza. It was great!

Love this! And no child is going to be upset at getting their presents early.

Absolutely this! Do presents as late as works for you all in the morning then dinner afterwards - it’s actually fine!

You can’t change the day. I would just focus on how to make the day fun for them. Do Christmas Eve how you normally do. On Christmas Day do stockings before DH leaves. Perhaps the stocking will have some new card games in them? Maybe Santa / FC will leave some new pj’s and you can have a PJ day till DH gets home? You could do a gingerbread shortbread house, play some games, get them to help set the table, prep food for your Christmas meal. Put a Christmas movie on for them if you need some time to get organised for dinner. When DH gets home, do presents and dinner.

I always worked Xmas day, and often Boxing day. The problem was also that DH and I worked opposite days/shifts to ‘cover’ childcare and school hols, so it could be several days until we could coincide enough to do a ‘proper’ Xmas day stretch for the kids with present opening and a relaxed meal. We just told our kids that Santa knew some people had to work Xmas day, and so he arranged another day instead with those parents and our Santa day this year would be xx. Easy peasy. When they got too old for Santa, we just told them what day our Xmas would be on. None of this was difficult.

I absolutely love this!

My DH works Christmas Day. I have a 7 year old. She’s aware that Daddy has to work. If I were you, I would get up nice and early and open presents/have breakfast with your DH and children before he goes off to work. Even if your DH has to leave for work half way through, the children will be fine. You could even get them to “save” a few presents to open later on his return from work. Then spend the day doing Christmas things like playing with presents, a walk, watching a Christmas movie then prepare a lovely dinner for when your DH arrives home. You then get the evening together as a family. Anything you specifically want to do as a four, you can do on Boxing Dat which becomes an extension of Christmas Day.
My DH works every year and honestly, we just make the best of it. I would really try to lean into it rather than fight it. Good luck 🙂

There is no way on earth that a ten year old can be fooled about the date and it would be highly unusual for a child of that age to truly believe in Father Christmas. I would imagine that the older one enjoys being in cahoots by letting the younger child enjoy the magic. I would be upfront with them and tell them that unfortunately their father has to work on Christmas Day this year but you are still going to have a lovely time. Then I would say that of course they can open their stocking presents on Christmas morning but the main presents are going to be saved for Boxing Day, which is when you are going to celebrate Christmas as a family. On Christmas Day itself, you could play board games and have crackers as well as watching a nice film. If they weather is alright, you could also have a walk. Foodwise, you could let them have favourite party food treats on Christmas Day, while having Christmas dinner on Boxing Day.

I think a lot of us who are replying grew up with parents or partners who worked Christmas hence why it never felt a big deal. If this the first time it has happened in OPs family I can understand why her initial thought is a bit of a panic. Hopefully she has read and seen that Christmas can be done in a multitude of ways and she will find a way that suits her family. Fwiw I remember being proud that my mum was working Christmas with people who couldn’t be with their family - and on the Christmas days she didn’t work we often ended up with extra guests from the children’s home she worked in. Likewise when exh worked Christmas Day as a nurse it was a good opportunity to talk to the dc about people who couldn’t be with their family and so they needed daddy to help look after them and how lucky were we that we could spend time together on any day and still make it a big celebration

As pp Needadviceplease4 suggests doing.
Dad will only be gone for part of the day. My dh worked Christmas a few times, he wasn't on a 9-5 shift, or a 5 day week. Maybe your dh wil be able to get off a little earlier, by whoever does the next shift after him?

I don’t want to be rude, but I can’t understand why you’d try to do this or how not doing so would ruin the magic? If you are very keen that they believe in Santa and that he has to come overnight on Christmas Eve, they can still do stockings (and possibly open at least a couple of stocking presents before your DH leaves as PP have suggested). But beyond that, why would you not just tell them and use it as an opportunity to foster pride in your family, in how hard your DH (and I’m sure you also) works, how it’s a sacrifice he’s making, how not everyone (ahem, DH boss) is willing to / has to do that, but how not everyone is lucky enough to have a Christmas at all. Isn’t that more in the spirit?

My husband had to work Christmas every other year ( early on this was a 24 hour shift, the bad old days of medical rotas)I had to work Christmas occasionally ( both doctors) when the children were little. We used to send a message to Father Christmas that Daddy was working so he knew. We opened some presents in the morning with just one parent and did Christmas dinner when daddy or mummy got back from work. When he was gone for the whole day and night we celebrated on the day and had an extra Christmas for daddy with some presents coming out of hiding for the 2nd Christmas as we had made sure Santa was in the loop!

We've done this for years as DH works at a&e. In your situation do stocking and if you want a present at 7am. Then nice breakfast, play with presents, do a couple of games , go for a walk, eat a little lunch (something easy), see if you have any friends who want to have you come and say hello for a mince pie and a play, or a meet in the park or pub. Come.home for 4ish, make a roast, watch a film, get dh home, eat dinner, more pressies, play with pressies, Bed.

I would just tell them "dad is working Christmas day so we are celebrating Christmas on 26th. I have spoken to Santa and he has said its no problem, he does it for lots if kids if their parents are working."

You will get less resistance and questions if you move it a day early rather than late. If the 10 yr old does know Santa is not real then less likely to kick up a fuss if presents are early.

Tell them daddy has to work. I’m sure he will have to do it again in a couple of years or so, unless he changes jobs to a place that is closed, so they may as well get used to it

I really don’t see what the issue is here… you’ll see your DH before he goes to work and you can have dinner and he can open his presents when he gets home. The kids won’t care… they just want their pressies… let them open them up and have a chilled day.