Alternative to Secret Santa

[CrackedHeels2]

I looking for ideas of something different to Secret Santa please.

We are a family of four - grown up sons (ages 25 and 23), who both have partners that they have been with for several years. The six of us have done a Secret Santa for the last few years. This year one couple don’t want to take part, citing financial reasons. No problem with this, don’t want them to spend more than they feel comfortable with. But I’m looking to still do some light-hearted gift exchange.

I have thought about a kind of lucky dip idea, I’d provide all the gifts. Any ideas of what these could be that would suit all? I don’t want to do rubbish that wouldn’t be valued by the recipients.

Any ideas gratefully appreciated!

What is the budget normally?
Could you set a limit of £5 then they might be able to afford that.
(if they can't afford that then my Christmas gift would personally helping them out in some way)

Or - instead of a lucky dip you could get everyone a book (you can get 3 for £7.50 in The Works) and a chocolate Santa.
That's just over £20 for everyone.

four nicer presents for the kids and two ok presents for mum and dad, put around the tree as normal?

Or....if you are happy to spend a bit more everyone could have their own stocking (if you're artistic you could put names on them) and add a few other bits to go with the book and chocolate - a tree decoration, socks, bubble bath (and an orange at the bottom).

Are you sure it will be well received? The couple who have said no would they feel guilty/embarrassed etc?
We have already had the conversation this year - no money spent on each other at all. We did the secret santa for a few years- 4 couples - started at 30quid then twenty and eventually it became the - what's the point- we are all adults and spending of £20 finding something suitable for a couple felt pointless in the scheme of things - its about the rest of the year etc. Any kids we buy for (but even that has become a well planned thing to ensure no doubling up etc.
It was easier in the 70s as no one had much so anything was special.

We sometimes do secret Santa at work where the gift has to be either pre-loved, or handmade, so it could be a box of homemade biscuits, or a vintage vase or something like that. We’ve also done donations to a charity that you think would mean something to the person receiving it. Another option would be to treat yourselves to a festive event? Maybe a trip to see some Christmas lights or something like that.

Instead of gift exchange could you play a game together? I wasn’t sure if you were looking for something to do and to fill up time or if it’s about the gesture of exchanging something that you were trying to find a different way to do that.

Thanks for all the thoughts / ideas. I like the stocking idea (although I’m not creative), the book each is a good plan - I think they’d all appreciate that. Budget has varied over the years from £5 to £20 or £25, we also had a focus on sustainable gifts last year. The handmade idea I like, we’ve made a lot of jam and chutney already this ready year so that is a starting point!

I don’t think the tip would work (although I would like it to), organising the four of them is like herding cats! Game idea I like - need to give it some thought to see how it could work.

It is just a bit of fun, every couple still gifts every other couple. Just something light hearted and building our extended family as the children grow up and develop their own lives seperate from us.

you could do some variation on Stealing santa - normally you draw numbers/roll a dice and the first person gets to select a gift from the secret santa pool, unwraps it and then person 2 can either steal your gift or select their own, and so on. If you buy and wrap them all to deliberately disguise them perhaps you pik first and subsequent people can either steal or pick while the gifts ar still wrapped, so you know what everyone is picking but you can't control the outcome as you were No.1, so everyone gets a random gift at the end

You could try and find things from charity shops which have meaning to the participants perhaps - so in my family we had a running joke about shawaddywaddy, so one of their records would be fun. And an old toy that had been a favourite for each child, etc.

White elephant maybe? You each buy a gift that anyone would like and then draw a number to see who goes first to choose a present. However, subsequent people can choose to steal your present instead of taking a new one. We play it at work and it’s great fun!

White elephant would be the best alternative imo. Everyone buys a present that would work for everyone and it's usually something very general, so no problem with finding something.

Do people not read the op at all? The whole point was to avoid everyone having to buy a gift.

Also said “I’m still looking to do some light hearted gift exchange” which she offered to pay for, I think most of these suggestions could be adapted to fit that.
Do you have any alternative suggestions to contribute that would better fit the brief?

I read the title and came on to suggest a couple of alternatives I have seen for workplace Secret Santa's, but when I read the op I realised they wouldn't be appropriate for the op. It was the last two posts that specifically say "everyone buys..." or "each person buys..." that I was think had missed the point. The rest are good suggestions.

A friend and I have been doing a charity shop book exchange recently cheap and a charity benefits and I get to read a book that I might not necessarily had chosen.