Well meant gifts that didn't hit the mark

[imnotthatkindofmum]

Here's a thread to post your disappointing gifts that you can't be disappointed with in real life! Let off a little steam without upsetting anyone!!

My lovely daughter bought me some novelty earrings. I never wear novelty earrings but she's so proud of them i have to wear them. She was so secured about me opening them but now I have to work out how little I can get away with wearing them so she doesn't realise I hate them!

Also DH only bought what was on my list. It was a cheap and simple list. I would have liked him to choose something he thought I would like. After 22 years not sure why I expect that though!

MiL always puts together a hamper for us, but its mostly posh dark chocolates with nuts and liqueurs and she leaves the price on everything so that we know how much its all cost her. My DB bought us a massive box of Cadburys Miniature Heroes which is much more our style and has already been demolished.

I have 4 fancy memo notepad blocks from the same person, in 2 different packs (of 3 and 1). And a masive horrible wooden letter organiser thing, which I don't need because I still have the last one they gave me.
Less well meant - a vegan leather handbag, which is good because I don't wear leather. But I also don't wear handbags or sparkles, which the giver knows and has since said. As in "was the bag OK? It was much sparkler than I thought it would be and I know that's not your thing."
Previous odd gifts have been a piglet that you put a roll of kitchen towel onto - it's body is the roll, piglet's head sticks out one side and back end the other.

Things have improved though because for a few years I got things like "baking with children" books and biscuit cutters, and cards chosen that my DC might like, rather than me. I sympathise with those who got given baby things as a gift.

This year DC has been given mine and my sister's old toys and books, wrapped up by my mum. They are very obviously used and wouldn't make the grade to sell at a jumble sale so wtf she thought she was doing giving them to my DC I don't know. Except she can't bear to throw things away. The fact they were mine or my sister's doesn't make them any more appealing to a child. Eg. A diary with scribble and stickers on and pages torn out, and a sheet of 35 year old stickers with lots missing. My sister has had a word but seems to have fallen on deaf ears so I will need to screen future presents by unwrapping and checking I advance. Passing things on is one thing but not wrapped up as a gift. She said she thought wrapping them made them more special. No! Made them more disappointing.

I feel mean saying this but it is cathartic.

These earrings might still be gold. I bought wedding ring - it was white gold only to find out the next day after wedding that I had reaction to it ( allergy to nickel). I took them back straight awayand showed them my poor, sore finger. They didn't question it and gave us money back. The thing is these rings were very expensive ad we bought them from very reputable chain -unbelievable.

But if you'd faked an ecstatic reaction to this monstrosity, you'd have to pretend ALL THE TIME that you loved it and have it on the wall, gurning down at you. I think honesty is your only recourse here. He needs to know you better and understand why you hated it. For a start, if he doesn't already know that you loathe being photographed and hate photos of yourself, he really should know you better!

That’s reminded me of something my grandma used to buy me as a child- alcoholic chocolate liqueurs! Did anyone else receive this only to realise as an adult they’d taken a liking to whisky and brandy at 8 years old? 😂

I feel awful for this but dd1 is a student and was worried about affording presents for people. I told her not to worry about getting me anything and sent her some cheap ideas for her younger siblings. She insisted she wanted to get me something too so I told her a few things I’d like ranging from £1 to £15. She bought me both the cheapest and most expensive item which I am delighted with but then she also bought me two toiletries gift sets.
Firstly she spent far too much on me and I’d rather she’d saved her money but also I’ve spent the last two years gradually working my way through all the random toiletries (and got left with a load of her half used stuff to finish off when she moved out). I feel so ungrateful but if she really wanted to get me something else I’d have preferred it was something else off my list rather than spending her money on random stuff 😳

My gran used to get me cherry brandy liqueurs for Christmas when I was a tween/young teen. They were gross! God knows why my mum let me have them 😂

This thread reminds me why I stopped buying/exchanging presents with the adults of the family!!

Although my SIL chooses to ignore this - she says she respects our choice but feels it necessary to get us a little "something" 😒 So you're not really respecting my choice, are you?! I'm fact, her presents were the reason I stopped! I once got a gardening set... I do not garden! I just don't want things I'll never use but this year we've again been given a game we'll never play. I do like games but I have kids now so don't have as much time... And she always picks really rubbish ones.

Oh here's another, not mine, but my poor DS.

He was a given bags and bags of his cousin's old books and toys... I feel terrible writing this as I try my best to buy second hand things and Xmas can be a terribly wasteful time, and over excessive. But they weren't wrapped for a start, it was quite shameful of my SIL! She never told me she was going to do it - she simply said she'd like to give DS books but didn't say they were hand me downs. I would happily pass on items to younger family members but I'd do it in addition to a gift, not as the main gift. As you never know how others feel about second hand gifts.

I was also pretty pissed that I had to put one "gift" in the bin a day later, as it broke and was quite clearly used/not great quality. I can't say what it was as might be outing but it also needed new batteries so there was a scramble to find some that fit, and then a faff with screwdrivers to get them in while my toddler was chomping at the bit!

The books were all in good condition but some of the other tat was not. Some books were interactive and also needed batteries so my young son was quite frustrated that they wouldn't work right away (as they needed new ones and she hadn't thought to replace them!). Had to order the batteries online in the end.

Rant over, feels soooo good to get that off my chest!

Apparently you can paint them with clear nail varnish, as long as you don't wear them for too long they should hopefully be ok (sorry if someone else has already advised this, currently at swimming so not meant to be on my phone, I should be watching my child mess around doing nothing for 20 minutes of her half an hour lesson 🙄)

That sounds awful, but is there not a brother involved to say "No, I'm buying a decent gift."?

That’s just sheer laziness as though they couldn’t be bothered taking them to the charity shop! You would at least check what is in good as new condition first, I even do that with things I donate.
The books thing reminds me of two crap presents, both from my sister haha! One year she gave me an out of date planner and “annual” of some magazine I’ve never heard of. Didn’t even bother wrapping it, just handed it to me for my Christmas present.
The other thing she does is buy my husband books a lot, despite him constantly telling her he’s got dyslexia and doesn’t read. One was when he had his own cake business and she bought him two books about creating a business that was basically for someone doing business studies at University. 😬

I used to hate being given handed down tat that people could not be bothered to take to the tip or charity shop themselves- often under the guise of helping out. The worst one for me was onc when DH came back from staying at a friend's house and he said rather bemusedly' They thought we would like this for DS1'. This included muddy wellingtons with a hole in them and a massive box of VHS tapes of cartoons - which in theory was a nice thought but it was in 2016 and I'm not sure if anyone still had a VHS machine then! Even the charity shop we took them too turned them down.

(Although I've just looked and you can buy VHS machines on ebay so who knows)

My dh’s gifts finally arrived today!!!! (I didn’t realise they were coming from Alaska which is why it took so long).

He loves them! Was totally caught off guard and had no idea what we was going to get (Viking style kitchen knives)

He’s said he’s going to display them and not use them cos he doesn’t want to damage the blades

I don't know if it's the same make (can't remember where they came from) but I love my Northern Knives Loki knife. it's so sharp, when I sliced garlic with it, I could slice so thin, even though the knife is quite chunky and heavy. the weight is taking some getting used to, but it cuts amazingly well.
quite tempted by the Bjorn chef knife or the Valhalla chef knife too.

A lovely relative of mine gets really carried away wanting to give us piles of stuff, even though we've asked them not to.

We got a massive Santa sack each. Most of it was from charity shops...several large heavy yellowed stale scented candles from long gone shops like BHS, a long bashed tube of stale bath bombs when I don't have a bath, my elderly parents were given far too small clothes that wouldn't have been their style anyway (obviously charity shopped with tags removed), I was given a size 16 floor length dress when I'm an 8/10 again most likely from a charity shop as I saw it on sale in 2020, and just lots of bulky little bits of tat, garish purses, a well used Debenhams handbag that I originally owned as a teen in 1997. Lots of silly things like novelty hats/travel mugs/homewares like the "live,
laugh, love" signs plus 7 or 8 boxes of biscuits and chocolates.

My (housebound) elderly parents are in the process of downsizing and moving as soon as they have a date arranged. Literally trying to do the Swedish Death Clean!
I am disabled and just can't live in a cluttered environment as I keep collapsing and I haven't been well enough to leave the house for weeks. But I've got all this stuff of ours to now try and redonate or give to shelters etc. I could honestly cry.

I'm sure they felt great giving us these jam packed 3 or 4 foot sacks...but the impact for us hasn't been great at all.

It was Northern Knives we got. We got the Loki and Ragnar set.

I've looked at them online and noticed that they are carbon steel. Have any of your knives rusted at all?

Well, we’ve only had them a few days, and dh doesn’t want to ruin his knives so he isn’t using them and is keeping them for display. So I don’t know about rusting

Ask them to come and take them away. Or dump in the bin.

We don't live in the same country! And dumping it is really wasteful and immoral imo.

Well keep it then

That sounds an absolute pain in the arse, @MyDeepZebra. Just what you could do without. So thoughtless. Do you have any charities that leave bags for you to fill and they collect? Or a local community group/mutual aid who might agree to collect as you're housebound?

Thank you for "getting it" and being more polite that the PP!

I'm going to try and enlist a friend to take it to the various places for me and pay for a carer to help my parents get rid of theirs before they move next month.

I just don't know where the relative's head was at...She knew all of our conversations were about decluttering/moving/having too much stuff. She has seen with her own eyes that I am not a size 16 and that none of my family members are a small...and that we don't need clothes! It's very frustrating.
But hopefully we'll be shot of it all soon.

I wasn't rude. Just giving my thoughts.