Older teens and changes to Christmas

[Rosbeet]

Anyone else mourning the old days of Christmas?

Put a Christmas film on to watch but they're all dispersed to talk to friends and do their own thing.

I think they will engage with some fun things tomorrow but it's just so different now to when they were little.

It's so difficult to feel the magic that was about years ago.

My eldest are 17 and 14 and the eldest in particular is way too cool to be even remotely excited. Their 4 yo sister on the other hand... she's literally bursting with joy, love her!
Not really looking forward to the inevitable early morning wake-up call, however! 😆

But at least they don't wake up at 5am when you didn't crawl to bed util 2am. I am looking forward to them not surfacing until 10 am and being able to contrain themselves until after coffee.

I'm waiting for 20 year old DD to go to bed! She's on the phone to her boyfriend.

15yo DD. Both her & husband fast asleep & just realised I forgot the milk & carrot - I'm gutted! She asked if she still had to wait for us before coming downstairs - eh yes!

Autistic teen ds has just done an 8 hour shift in the local co op. We have stockings ready to go he's absolutely had enough of Christmas. If you have ever worked in retail at Christmas you'll totally get it

I totally get where you are coming from.
Ours are 16,15,10 and felt a shift about two years ago and started a new tradition to make Christmas Eve feel christmasy. We go into town every year now and have dinner. We have a great laugh and have a few drinks, our eldest even had a pint this year! They know they have to go. As they get older we will make it a lunch as I'm sure they will want to meet friends in the pub as we did at that age.

Also I do think we look back through rose tinted glasses. I do miss it but I also remember feeling exhausted come Christmas Day when they were little!

I was sad about it a couple years ago when my then 13yo didn’t want to leave out Santa snacks or read night before Xmas.

This year I’ve taken my now 15yo to cinema as a new Xmas treat and been able to put the gifts under the tree even though they are all awake. Over next couple days I will be including my 18yo and 24yo boyfriends in our xmas. It feels like the family is starting to grow and maybe in the next few years grandchildren will bring back the ‘magic’. Until then Christmas is different but I’ll embrace the quiet years.

A friend has just posted a photo on FB of the carrot and glass of milk for Santa, and it made me very wistful. DC has just come in from working (part-time job in hospitality during uni holidays) and is working all day tomorrow too 😭 Christmas lunch with elderly relatives is just not the same! The magic has gone

@Imgoingoutforawhile Hope you're okay
It must be hard for you but it will get easier... look forward to an exciting 2025 with peace of mind and an ability to make your own plans and do them!

I don't miss any of it! Love that I now have a teen that enjoys the day without getting up early and no faffing the night before.

Are you me?! Same here. It's hard isn't it? I'm lying in bed by myself now, waiting for them to get up and open the presents that they chose before going to their dad's. It's a far cry from Christmas's of old.

I keep telling myself that this is the worst one to get through and next year will be better.

We try and keep a few traditions going despite mine being 20 and 23. Always watch a Christmas movie together on Christmas Eve.
They do always sleep in until midday on Christmas morning though so I do miss that bit of them coming downstairs to see if he's been. Sigh! It goes so fast!

We've started to have Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve too - it's lovely and cosy with candles and lights. Always a quiz or two afterwards.
Christmas Day is very chilled!

Mine are 13 and almost 17. I still do a stocking for them. I don't miss it all, it was a lot of work. The only thing I miss maybe is going to see the nativity scenes (belén) in the run up (we are in Spain). But we never made a massive massive fuss about Christmas as we still have the three kings at the beginning of January and the three kings parade, so loads more to come, Christmas twice basically.
It's nice now they're older to be able to chill out a bit and just do what we like, some of it together.

My youngest is 17! Yes I do miss it a bit but I don't miss the pressure of making it all perfect tbh.
I've just got up, heading out to collect elderly dmum. 17 year old still asleep, adult dd and her bf still asleep.
Next year we will have the grandkids so that's something to look forward to!

Are yours up? Mine is still sound asleep and will be for hours.

I'm just back from Parkrun and he hasn't even noticed I wasn't here 😂 I'm on veggie prep now with Christmas carols in the background. I'll make his pancake mix in about an an hour.

Mine are 23 & 25 and it’s always been really good. They know the drill, up, washed, dressed, dog walk, snack/breakfast, gifts, see grandparents, dinner, slob out. Since they’ve been over 18 I always pick them up from their night out on Christmas Eve at about 12:30/1am so i know they’re home and they are excited to hand out the gifts, help with dinner prep. I consider myself very fortunate.

My older 2 (16 and 18) joined us after youngest went to bed to watch die hard with some gin. They also sometimes fill each others stockings.

On the day we all just chill together in the lounge.

Mine are 15 and 17 and still like to keep a lot of the traditions going, though we have always been quite low-key. They have done gingerbread houses, watched the usual films with me, played Christmas music, read the night before Christmas before hanging up stockings and played games. Ds1 is always pretty amenable but I feel ds2 has been spending a lot less time in his room over the last few days, which is nice.

There are some wistful moments but overall it's a lot easier and it's nice to see the elements they still want to hang on to. I'm anticipating next year will be different as ds1 will have been to university so I don't know if that will change him in some way and he won't be so amenable!

Yes! I used to be stressed out my head, working, tidying and cleaning especially when we were hosting, whilst keeping them entertained and trying to create some semblance of magic

Yes op same here 😢

First Christmas in 19 years we just didn't think to leave anything out for FC and the Reindeer 😭 we were all drinking and playing games til gone midnight and had to kick the teens out of bed at 9am!

Yes I miss it when they were little and excited but it is less tiring and they enjoy the food more now and generally less demanding! Presents probably more £££ though!

It's so hard. My DC are adults now and for a long time it was just DS and I. The first year he didn't get up until quite late I felt mournful. I sat around in the quiet and ate chocolates.

You just don't realise it at the time when you're up at 6am and then watching Christmas movies or playing games with them that it goes by so quickly.

But life changes shape doesn't it? I feel very lucky that my DC want to spend any time with me.

I actually prefer Christmas with teenagers. They don't get over exhausted, they entertain their grandmother while DH and I sort out the food and they help with the tidying before and after and tomorrow DD2 will probably cook for us.