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Feel like I'm being difficult

4 replies

Iliketulips · 11/12/2024 14:56

Invited BIL's family Boxing Day, we didn't realise they had people staying, so in all fairness can't make it. I suggested late afternoon/evening on 27th instead, but that doesn't work for them as they're seeing someone else late afternoon/evening. They're free in day on 27th, but I really want to keep it free to do something else other than Christmas/change of scenery and don't want another big lunchtime meal. I suggested a countryside day out instead, but BIL's wife doesn't want to walk around in the cold. I've now suggested lunch in town, but that doesn't work as they want to open presents in front of us and not in public. DH suggested before Xmas, but they haven't got time as they're getting ready for their guests.

I've got four days off, Mum here Xmas Day into Boxing Day, then to SIL now for Boxing Day. 28th we're with our DD. Then I'm back to work on the Sunday. I just want a day doing something different.

OP posts:
kelsaycobbles · 11/12/2024 15:02

Not unreasonable- sometime things just don't work out

jackstini · 11/12/2024 15:07

You don't have to see them
But if you want to then maybe the following..?

Open presents with them Boxing Day morning - they come round at 10ish
Have a nice brunch - bagels, croissants, smoked salmon, eggs, fruit, pastries...
Then you do your own thing in the afternoon & go for a lovely walk
Just you 2 for a luxury supper in the evening

CandyCane457 · 11/12/2024 17:00

You’re not being difficult at all! They are the ones that are hard to pin down. You suggested two dates to them and they couldn’t do either. Three if you include your suggestion of before Christmas. They’ve given you one pocket of time that they expect you to be free in, and are being a bit demanding about what to do. Tbh I would’ve just left it there but assuming they now know you’re free that day, it’s trickier to get out of all together.

At this point I’d be very honest and say you don’t want to host a big lunch for a third day on the run, and you do quite fancy getting out and about and having a nice walk that day, so suggest if they are dead set on opening presents at home, they can pop round mid morning for coffee and panettone, but you’ll be heading out for a walk around 1pm and they’re welcome to join if they like, or leave if they don’t fancy it.

kelsaycobbles · 11/12/2024 17:10

They aren't free that day - they have other plans ( chilling is a plan)

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