What age do DC start getting presents for people?

[Wholeboxoftissues]

Just wondering what's "normal". I was expected to get a gift for each family member from an early age (not sure when but as far back as I can remember) and I hated it so much, the expectation of it. DD is now 6 and I realise I haven't got a clue what sort of age that would start happening normally? Whether that's a present under the tree nominally "from" DC but they didn't choose it, or something they've been heavily guided on, or something they genuinely chose themselves.

I take DC to choose their presents to each other, and for DH, grandparents. So they pick with me, and know what they've bought. I haul them out, make them do it, and pay.

Independent responsibility for buying their own? I'm thinking of doing that with eldest this year, as he's 16 and has a little job.

May 3 get a joint gift for family members. They choose it together but don’t pay for it. We help them choose or sometimes just tell them what we’re getting but the children can choose the colour/style etc. As far as I know they really enjoy it! But it’s very much a family activity rather than any form of pressure.

We started this when my eldest was about 5, middle 3 and youngest not born. Their involvement has obviously changed as they’ve got older. The now 2 year old has very little to do with it.

i would like them to eventually start using at least some of their own money so I’m curious as to what answers others have.

17 year old is buying for those we will see on Christmas Day this year. Next year when he is 18 he will buy for everyone I get presents for. Until now his name has just gone in the tag with ours.

We made presents from as early as j can remember for godparents, grandparents and any elderly relations/neighbours. Not much e.g. I'd cut star shapes out of their painted pieces of paper, laminate, hole punch and add string = a tree decoration, plus a Christmas card they'd "sign".
I like getting my children to think of others, not in money but in time, we talk about great aunt so and so as we make them in one afternoon.

Physically buying gifts, my children have naturally chosen to do this with their pocket money age ten upwards, it's been really sweet.

My kids get each other a gift - from the younger ones it's just a gift from my stash with their name on it, but from about 6 years old I give them a set amount of money per sibling and we go shopping together.

My DC have always given gifts to each other, us parents and their grandparents. Obviously this started as us parents choosing and buying but as they've got older they've got more involved and done the choosing.

My teens now choose and pay for those gifts themselves (they have holiday jobs), and for their friends. They have also done secret Santa at school amongst their classmates over the years.

DS is 16, he wanted to buy dd present himself this year. He gets PIP but wanted to use his pocket money. I still have to buy his dad’s stuff though 😂. I think he’s only buying her it because he knows what he’s brought her will get him serious brownie points 🤣

My 3 DC have always had a gift to give each other at Christmas and a gift to give me and DH.

Up until about 5, I would just choose it and tell them this is the present you are giving so they would have a gift to physically give but had no part in choosing.

From about 5 to about 9ish, I would give them a choice from some of the little gifts I had already bought. So I would show them 3 little gifts (around £10-15 mark) and ask them which one they would like to be from you and they would choose one.

From about 10, I or DH have taken them Christmas shopping individually to help them choose something and pay for it. I still do this with my older two who are 12 and 16 and for all of us, it is one of our favourite things to do.

My youngest is 6, and out of interest I took her Christmas shopping last week to choose something for her older siblings and, in short, it was a disaster and really unenjoyable and she chose nothing! I won't be doing it again for a while. My system above worked well for years so will stick with it!

I used to give my girls a budget from an early age and then take them shopping for presents for each other DH and their Nan. As they got old and they are now just signed into most of my online accounts (Amazon, m and s, asos type stuff) they sort it themselves within their budget. My 16 year old is now working and said she will use her own money this year for a gift for me and DH, although I have stressed to her that I am happy with the current arrangement and her little wage is for her to enjoy

My eldest (single parent) has shopped for me for Xmas bday and Mother's Day since she turned around 8 really - I do receive the most random gifts but the thought she has picked them out is what makes them special 😂

I can't imagine a kid hating getting gifts for family and I'd be quite disappointed if they were happy to receive but miserable about giving!

DD is 4, we let her pick something from a charity shop or we buy the gifts then ask her to pick which one is "from her". She "helps" to wrap and writes the recipient's name on it, then asks every day if it's time to give them the gift yet!

We started around that age by taking them to Poundland and letting them choose something for each other, for us and for grandparents, it ended up being good fun with everyone trying to hide what they were buying from each other as we went round the shop and paid. Gradually moved onto them buying independently in their teens.

I think we started giving grandparents and one particular aunt separate presents from them as soon as they were old enough to understand what presents were. They got to do the physical handing over and got thanked.

Actually, I think we might have got S1 a present from S2 when they were just-4 and 9 months respectively. So by then it was well-entrenched.

Once child was getting regular pocket money we made it clear that this was expected to cover presents from them. By that point it was parents, grandparents (3), aunt, sibling. We would provide guidance and help with the actual purchase.

By the time they were about 12 they were doing most of it themselves, just asking for card details! (we didn't realise till relatively late that under-16s could get a debit card)

The two of them would often give joint presents. I think that makes it more fun, too.

From day 1. I bought them for the first few years but as soon as they were old enough to understand the concept of buying presents I would take them to the pound shop/supermarket and let them choose. Now as older teens they do it all independently.

From birth our DC have given a gift to both GP's, Mummy & Daddy and each other. DP and I choose and wrap the gifts. For GP's it's usually some kind of photo gift or DC will paint something at the local ceramic cafe.

Our DC are both at primary school and DP and I pay for the gifts. I remember when I went to secondary school I was expected to put aside half my pocket money to pay for Christmas and birthday presents and holiday spending money. I remember I always used to buy boxes of chocolates for everyone as that’s all my money would stretch to and there were many shops in my town.

When we were young (I’m 83) my grandmother used to buy National Savings Stamps for myself, my brother and my cousin. We each had a savings book given to us to cash at the post office. This was intended for us to go out and buy presents for the family. If I remember it amounted to about £1. and 50 pence - old money and in the late forties. We went on our own and headed for Woolworths where you could buy cheap vases, cheap perfume (California Poppy) pipe cleaners etc etc. We never kept money for ourselves. There was an exception my young brother said he had money for himself. Asking him how he said he had bought the women a packet of hair grips and the men a packet of pipe cleaners. I told our mum and he was made to get “proper” presents. He was disappointed. Children were more independent then and went to the shops on their own. I must have been about 9 or 10 and my brother about 6 or 7. My cousin about 7 or 8.

They have always got each other a gift from early ages but paid for my us.

Once they are in high school they can buy their own friends gifts from their own money.

This year they have opted to do a family secret Santa, just the 5 of us and are buying presents with their own money, oldest 10 & 12 yo it’s all their idea. We are covering the cost for our 7yo.

We don’t expect them to buy for others, we buy grandparent and cousin gifts. We will expect them to start buying their own presents when they start earring themselves.

They have on occasion bought an odd family member a gift when they have seen something they really like, but it’s not expected of them. My 10yo desperately wanted to get something for her 14yo cousin for Christmas, we told her we’d done our family gift already but if she wanted to buy something extra from her she’d have to pay for it herself so she did.

I’d say 6 is a good time to help her to make something for him. And if you’re out shopping and see something he needs, like a box of man’s tissues in a neat container, then ask her if she’d like to give it to him and suggest it contribution. I think these things gradually work themselves out.