Should I reciprocate unexpected gift?

[cringingatchristmas]

Awkward situation:

A newish friend (we met at work this year but don't work directly with each other) unexpectedly gave me a Christmas gift this week when we had our last in-person day at work before Christmas. I haven't opened it yet so don't know value.

We are actually seeing each other socially at the weekend with our kids so I do have the opportunity to buy a pressie and gift it to her but don't know whether it'll look like I'm only doing it because she gave me one (when she brought the gift into work, we both thought that was the last time we'd be together before Christmas as the social event has been arranged since then, so it's obvious) that I hadn't planned to gift her anything.

She gave the gift saying it was a bit of a thank you (I've helped her on a big project recently) as much as a Christmas present.

Would it be more awkward to not gift anything or to obviously only give because I received?

People don't give gifts to get gifts in return, especially if it was kind of a thank you present. Some people don't really "do" Christmas gifts and she probably didn't know if you were one of those people or not before she bought you something. If you'd like to get her something or you'd feel very awkward then buy something, but don't do it just because you think she'd be expecting something back. If you don't really know each other that well then a token box of nice chocs or bottle of something will be enough

Once upon a time I would have said reciprocate the gift, but after finding myself in this situation a few times and reciprocating the unexpected gift because it felt the polite thing to do, I somehow started getting snarky comments of ‘you only give to receive’ from them, even though I was the one reciprocating and not the original giver. It was like I offended them by reciprocating.
I find people complicated these days. Do what makes you feel comfortable.

I have friends who do this, and I made sure to say to them that I don't really do gifts, but I am very thankful for their thoughtfulness- and that I tend to buy close friends little surprises over the year, if I see something I know they will love. It takes all the pressure off (and it's lovely to occasionally get a small unexpected gift through the year for them).

I hate gifts for gifts sake. Your friend gave you one as a thank you, you don't need to get one in return. Just be sincerely gracious!

Is there a way you could turn the meet up into a gift? Pay for her entry ticket, treat her to coffee, take some nice cakes to share...

You don't need to buy anything because it's a thank you gift but you could say how much you appreciate it

Yes I could do this, although there will be more than just the two of us meeting up so it could be awkward if I paid for her but not the others.

If you want to then buy a box of chocolates/posh biscuits or similar.

Don't give her a gift back. She's not expecting one because she said her gift was more of a thank you for the help you've given her with the project and if you reciprocate that kind of negates her thank you. Difficult to explain but that's how I'd feel in her shoes.

Also, if you are going to continue working together, it sets a precedent for having to exchange gifts every year. Which is fine if you want to, but you might not!

It sounds like there'll be work and social occasions in the coming year where you can say 'I'll get this' and buy her a drink/coffee/lunch to recognise the friendship and her generosity without it being awkward.

Of course, if the project was a ground-breaking international climate conference that is going to change the course of human history and the gift turns out to be something mind-blowingly expensive to mark its import, I have no idea what you do!

Thanks @PleatedShade - I was thinking along the lines of what you've said in your post. There will be plenty of opportunities to reciprocate the gesture without giving a gift right now just for the sake of reciprocating.
The project wasn't huge - hopefully it's just a token gift she's given me.