Elf on Shelf Alternatives?

[CrebillionFils]

I find elves creepy (I blame some 80’s Christmas films for that), and want to find an alternative for my family. My daughter is only one, but I love the holidays and want to start my own traditions.

For all those who might say I’m being ott when my daughter’s only one, my Christmases as a child were stressful ferried between divorced parents (though they both threw a marvellous Christmas Day, I just couldn’t relax knowing I’d have to then get in a car and go to the next one) and one parent died when I was kid, so I want the most cosy The Holiday style Christmases for my dc.

Those who love Christmas please shower me with ideas! 🧑‍🎄

The elf on the shelf was only invented in 2005, we managed fine before it just with Santa/Father Christmas. You don't need an alternative to the newfangled elf.

(Anyone who thinks elves are nice definitely needs to read Terry Pratchett's Lords and Ladies ... I'm re-reading it at the moment)

I agree with Errol just forget about the Elf you don’t need an alternative. We’ve never bothered with the hateful elf. My son once asked why we don’t have an Elf and I said something like Santa doesn’t need to check up on you as I tell him if you’re naughty. I actually don’t know what the Elf does or means but I’ve always thought it was creepy and weird.

Ignore the elf.

just have a nice advent calendar when your DC is old enough to appreciate this. And when I say that - I am old - mine was a cardboard one with lovely pictures behind each window which I had such joy opening.

My DC (teens) have chocolate ones.

the sodding elf came to us early due to me being half American - I managed 3 years when they were young, it was too much. They are now 15 and 13 and when we talk about it they don’t regard it as magical or lovely - just weird and wanted the days when the elf left a ‘treat’ 🙄

Ideas for your own traditions...
Music - we had a set of proper cheesy Xmas songs, things like 'went Santa got stuck up the chimney' and 'frosty the snowman'. SingRudolph (with the extra 'like a lightbulb' bits) and jingle bells,that sort of thing.
Xmas tree - start with some childproof decorations then each year don't replace them. You can take your LO on a trip out (perhaps to a garden centre type place) to choose an extra bauble each year. Decorating the tree with 'the decorations' can be one of your traditions.

When they're big enough take them for a walk in the dark to see the neighborhood lights.

This year I'm doing an advent calendar which is fabric with refillable pockets and instead of chocolate im putting in a festive activity each day. Like, watch Elf, go for a walk to see some lights, donate to a food bank etc.

I’m enjoying everyone’s hatred of the dreaded elf. I see him in stores and shudder. I also lived in America and hated the elf (and the pressures on parents).

An advent calendar is a nice idea. I had those paper ones too and loved them. A wooden one you can put things in might be fun. (But little things like a gold chocolate coin etc).

I was worried living in England (I’m from a country that doesn’t do the elf thing) that my child would feel hard done by. @ErrolTheDragon I haven’t read that book, Sounds like it would solidify my elf dislike 😅

I love doing a Christmas Eve box for my kids. We open it late afternoon on Christmas Eve and it has a bathbomb, new pair of PJS, hot chocolate, popcorn. Then we settle in to watch a Christmas movie.

Also as someone else has said previously - we have fabric advent calendars with pockets that I can refill with different things each year. Some days a chocolate, another day a little fidget toy, Christmas hair bands, little bits and bobs. My kids love them as every day it’s something completely different.

Another idea is to scour the charity shops and buy as many Christmas themed books as you can, wrap them up individually and have them in a box by their bed - each night leading up to Christmas they can unwrap one and read together before bed. Then hide them for the year until next Xmas.

I hope you have a fabulous Christmas with your little one and make lots of wonderful memories, Christmas is just magic with toddlers 🥰🎅🏼

An Advent candle is a lovely tradition and a nice way to take some of the manic-ness out of Advent.

If you would like an elf as you're worried your child will feel left out, then could I suggest the kindness elf?

You don't need to buy the official one, any elf toy will do, and it's such a lovely way to spread some kindness at Christmas

https://theimaginationtree.store/pages/the-kindness-elves-set

@Whinge the kindness elf is a lovely idea. I have a friend who could make something like this too.

@Insuranceheadache brilliant idea, I’ve just ordered a lovely one from Fenwicks!

@HarrietStyles I love all your ideas, and My partner and I are big readers so the Christmas book idea is just lovely. Thanks so much. I can’t wait to create Christmas magic for our new family of three.

@ErrolTheDragon the idea of a new bauble is a lovely idea, I think jellycat are doing some which will be childproof , I’ll buy the smallest (cheapest) one they have!

@Hibernatalie your twist on the advent calendar is lovely.

I avoided the elf for a long time, but kids hijacked me with the big sad eyes and I eventually gave in. If you want to do the set ups, but want to avoid it being an elf, just do a reindeer, penguin, mystery figure that is never actually seen etc. My kids love it despite my grumpy protestations. Yes, I survived childhood without it, but we also didn't have seatbelts in cars, so change isn't necessarily bad. I do draw the line at Christmas eve boxes, not buying even more presents. Everyone has different priorities for their family.

We didn't do xmas eve boxes, but did do the new pair of pjs.

We decorate or buy a new bauble every year for the Christmas tree and last year I caved and bought elves as my daughter so desperately wanted to have one that she was imagining we had one and telling me all the wonderful things it was doing.

She was absolutely made up when (on about the 15th December ) she found him. My son then wanted one too so about 5 days later, my daughter's elf brought a friend home from the North Pole to stay with us...

Our elves are lovely though. They don't play tricks or do anything naughty. They are very much bringers of Christmas joy, as they should be (we watched the Elf on the Shelf film on Prime and there is no naughtiness in that at all). This year they'll reappear on the 1st December riding sausage dogs (that the kids have been lusting after for months) and just hang out for the month before going "home" on Christmas Eve.

Dgs had a nativity set and in the run up to Christmas dd used to move the kings around the house for dgs to find each morning. They had a chocolate coin as an incentive. They didn't make it to the stable to see baby Jesus until Christmas day.

I never fancied bothering with the elf; thought I'd re-assess if DCs ever asked about it or seemed like they really wanted it. They never have.and I think I'm out the other side now! Consider myself lucky.

I have an advent nativity scene so each day you add a character from the Xmas story (sheep, Joseph, wiseman etc with baby Jesus as lay one) to build the whole nativity. We have a string of numbered stockings hung from the fireplace that contain them. My kids took it in turn to add a character to the scene (sometimes fighting!) on a window ledge, learnt the original Xmas story, and still do it now in their 20s. Mine isn’t as nice as this one. Advent nativity scene Although not cheap it could be a good investment. Have a lovely time.

i have never bothered with the Elf with my 4 children. I do a wooden fill it yourself advent calendar, I put in a variety of chocolates and some different bits such as festive colouring, chocolate tree decorations for the day they decorate the tree, little craft projects, stamp on the 1st for Santas letter. . Don’t do Christmas Eve boxes but I do Christmas pyjamas at the start of December, and they get a festive book that we read together each year. We also go to the pantomime every Christmas Eve & dinner out afterwards followed by a bath, & movie with chocolates.

… Christmas themed duvet covers for kids, an idea I got from a work colleague when I was pregnant years ago and I started when my kids were little. I normally put them on the beds two weeks before Christmas all fresh and lovely - kids love it x

There are so many beautiful Christmas picture books. (Please feel free to PM me for titles). Every year wrap up twenty four and unwrap and read one each night of advent.

You could put a frog on your dog?

We have an Advent Angel (photo) the doll comes in a wee mini size as well as normal doll size. She got hidden around the house when the kids were wee and had little gifts or notes (chocolate coin each or a note saying “today we are going to see Xmas lights at the garden centre”) and now just tends to arrive on Dec 1st with the advent calendars as the kids are older…

I have a box of Xmas books- picture ones, that have built up over the years. (26 years of parenting plus a few from my own childhood). These come out Dec 1st and sit in a basket and the grandchildren choose a story each visit. Sometimes the older kids read them- they enjoy the nostalgia. As kids got older we moved onto chapter books to read together. Christmas Pig last year and I have the Box of Delights for this year.

An advent candle is a nice idea and for a few years we’d light it and read for the time it took to burn a number. Often we’d forget though and it would burn a few…

I don’t do Xmas Eve boxes but Xmas pjs come out first week in Dec then bedding too so it can be enjoyed for the whole of the month as I don’t like Xmas pjs to be worn year-round.

Over the month we do hot choc stations, Xmas crafts, card making/sending… baking etc.

Hobbycraft do a felt Christmas tree which is nice for little ones to play with.

I couldn’t justify the expense at the time but I’ve always hankered after the Lakeland nativity advent If I could start over I’d get this instead of any other advent calendar.

Instead we added something to our standard nativity set usually from holy art and now we have Roman centurions, Herod, shepherds, an inkeeper, various animals and a dinosaur.

I think the elf is a terrible idea if you want to do Father Christmas/Santa because magic is better with a bit of mystery and distance. There’s too much potential to slip up with the elf.

The Elfie letters are eye wateringly expensive and, at the right age, worth every penny imo and possibly a good alternative to Elf on the Shelf.

For a few years we had a couple of felt mice move into our doll house every Christmas, and spend December decorating, and moving about. Dd loved peeping in the windows to see what they were up to. That was inspired by Beatrix Potter’s Take of Two Bad Mice which was one of dd’s favourites. So you’ll probably find odd little traditions suggest themselves as you go along.

Books always featured heavily for us - and even though I’ve decluttered most, there are a few classics that I still like to look through myself. I’d recommend Alfie’s Christmas as a good start.

Aw this is bringing back memories of when my now big kids were smalls.

Choose what you start carefully as things become traditions quickly and then you are stuck with it. 😁

We had a basket of Christmas books that came out every year and lived by the tree or by the fireplace (not too close) and the kids chose stories to read.

December 1st the advent calendars, winter bedding (snow scene with animals so used half the year), craft activity or card making kit and something funny like Christmas shaped pasta.

Christmas Eve, new pyjamas so they looked tidy in the morning instead of the usual scruffiness and maybe a chocolate stirrer. Also a family puzzle so the nobody owned it.

Leaving beer, Mince pie and carrot out for Father Christmas and Rudolf before they went to bed.

We had activity calender with little bits of paper in with something for each day, mostly simple stuff that we might have done anyway, dressed up as

"Get ready for Christmas by tidying up room and putting up fairy lights."

Watch film e.g. muppets Christmas Carol
Make paper chains
Make/write cards
Get tree
Decorate tree
Make snowflakes
Toy tidy up /donate to charity shop
Walk to gather greenery to make wreath, garland, table decoration
Trip to town to choose a small present for perhaps a sibling, other parent, local present collection
Wrap small gift and put under tree
Walk to see Christmas lights
Christingle service
Panto
Ice biscuits
Go to school Christmas fair
Go to see Father Christmas
Decorate Gingerbread house
Bubblebath with candles (battery)
Lay table on Christmas eve, they loved this, drawing place cards and deciding where people would sit

@HannahDefoesTrenchcoat I love all these & I am feeling nostalgic reading your post 🎄

We have a lovely cloth advent calendar that was sent to me from Germany. It has little pockets for every day that we put chocolate in.

Also nice Christmas books. We’d get them out at the beginning of December and use them for story time. Some of them also had buttons to push for little songs.

I’ve given multiple small children a felt Christmas tree that has felt ornaments so they can decorate and redecorate to their hearts content. They’re flat and hang on the wall or door. Cheap on Amazon.

Go somewhere with a lovely light or tree display. Really small kids love just looking at all the bright lights and colorful decorations.