How do you do it? Looking for ideas

[YukoandHiro]

Even though I'm in my 40s I'm hosting for the first time this year. Me, DH and 2 DDs (young) and we're hosting my parents who are coming for 3-4 days.

Until now, when we finally have the space to host, we've mostly gone to their house. My mum made Christmas a big deal in our home when I was growing up and I always loved it, but it was a big job - lots of courses at every meal etc. As an adult I've given her lots of help but it's still loads and loads of unnecessary stress. I've been dreading replicating it and being constantly in the kitchen and not enjoying any of it.

My DH sensibly pointed out the other day that we don't have to do it the same as this is our house and we can do it our way.... But then he didn't offer any compelling alternatives as he's a total Scrooge and hates Xmas anyway and would try to ignore it entirely if it weren't for the DDs.

So... I'm interested in ideas. What special food do you do without too much effort? What traditions do you have that make it magical for DC without making you break down with the mental load?

Can't wait to make our own version, but I just can't see what I want it to look like yet!

We will still have a turkey dinner but the rest is up for grabs

Start early. Fill a freezer with food. Plan meals and entertainment. Cook most of xmas food on day before.

Agree with PP! Also, once you’ve cooked the mountain of food on Christmas Day, it’s wall to wall leftovers and cheese. No more cooking except bacon baps in the morning.

Early December:
Make and freeze pigs in blankets, stuffing, any freezable veg dishes (eg red cabbage, swede and carrot mash, even roast potatoes) and sauces.

Decide what's worth having home-made and what's worth buying in.

Check how long everything will take to cook and plan the timings now. Sort out any clashes. At some point between now and Christmas Eve, set up timer prompts on your phone. Allocate tasks to other people, dividing up cooking/cleaning/ hosting/childcare jobs in a way that is fair and works for your household, and gives everyone a break.

Christmas Eve: after lunch one person entertains the children by taking them for an active outdoors walk/trip to the park. Everyone else peels/chops/stuffs/washes up etc while listening to Christmas carols and eating mince pies.

After the children are in bed, set the table.

On Christmas day, follow the timings plan.

Also, ditch any jobs that you don't thing are worth it. Do you want starters? A fancy table? To go on a big family activity on Christmas Eve? If not, don't do it.

What about a raclette or fondue/ grill type set up so your only prepping and part of the fun and festivity is beyond cooking their bits? Or something similar with a “cook yourself” element. My little boy LOVES our raclette grill (it’s also fab in summer you can do steaks and stuff on the hot plate on top) and we now do it on Xmas eve together as a special meal.

You can do buffet type plates of meats and cheeses and dips etc with breads and make it a really hearty meal without slaving away for hours.

We have a takeaway on Christmas Eve, having cooked gammon in the slow cooker, constructed the pigs in blankets, prepared the stuffing, veg and potatoes, and made cauliflower cheese ready for Christmas Day. We also set the table in advance.

Christmas day breakfast is bacon sarnies made by me. DH is responsible for getting the turkey in the oven, and then spends around an hour in the kitchen cooking everything to eat at 1ish. I tend to keep the DC happy and host, but I’m on hand if he needs another pair of hands, and our guests are usually happy to muck in too. We don’t bother with a starter, and guests usually bring dessert (Christmas pud, trifle and a cheesecake or chocolate thing). There’s also homemade Christmas cake on offer.

In the evening we usually have turkey/gammon sandwiches, a cheeseboard and some party food type things.

Boxing day we do no cooking. It is a day of everyone picking on at all the lunch/cheeseboard/party food leftovers whenever they fancy something, and microwaving something is as strenuous as it gets.

27th we make a turkey curry. Breakfast and lunch tend to be easy and light.

We go big on the Christmas party food (normally M&S or Cook with some handmade bits) so we don't need a starter. We also eat late enough in the day that we don't need an evening meal although we might have a bit of cheese available.

My favourite tradition which I'm bringing back from my childhood is an extra visit from Father Christmas at about 5pm with some presents that he 'forgot'. These are usually silly little bits - games, puzzles that type of thing. But it's enough just to perk things up when there's a danger of everyone falling asleep!

Buy Delia's Christmas she walks you through catering the whole 2 weeks.

Thanks everyone! I think proper planning, lots of prep and freezing in advance will definitely be the key for me. I'm a bit of a seat of my pants mum re: kids daily dinners and never get around to batch cooking but will make a December plan to prepare for this.

Buffet style dinners are the best bit of Xmas so I'll really go for that.

Would love to hear any other traditions you have to make the days with family special

Last Christmas I made hand made crakers.A small present for each person. Miniature drinks, earrings, chocolate. I also wrote cheesy jokes. Hats were from the pound shop.

Start now. If you make a plan and start now, everything will be done and December will be stress free and totally relaxed.

Supermarkets and butchers are opening their books for Christmas orders around now, so if you want a particular type of turkey or you want to make your own pigs, you need to think about getting your order in sharpish. Have you got a shed or a spare cupboard you can store things in? Or even a storage tub in the corner of your bedroom. Start buying non perishables now with your normal grocery shopping. It spreads the cost so you don’t really notice it too much and there are no worries about getting supermarket delivery slots or having to run out Christmas Eve because they’ve substituted your most essential sweets with a pack of cereal bars.

We make a Nutella christmas tree with DC for breakfast- takes 10 mins to make together and it's YUMMMMMY.

Christmas dinner- we learned years ago it's just pointless stress- so we buy the whole lot pretty much from M&S! So worth the money, it tastes good too and just takes a bit of time and maths to warm everything up.

We bought the Cook Christmas Dinner, which has all the timings and it was the least stressful meal ever, so we are doing the same again this year. We just add a few extras, making sure they are factored in as well. We also put the plates and serving dishes in the dishwasher for a short run, so they are all warm for serving.

Everyone had their own job to do, including the littlies, who set the table, folded the napkins and put out the crackers. It was brilliant, can’t wait for this year!

While the oven is still hot we bake part baked rolls ready for snacking later and Boxing Day with leftovers.

We had small packets of pencils and colouring in mats for the children as well.

When her kids were little a friend of mine used to do her main Christmas dinner on Christmas eve, have turkey and chips Christmas day so she could really enjoy the day and have either turkey curry or picky bits on boxing day.

We have a takeaway Christmas eve and either a walk out somewhere or go to the cinema. Cooked breakfast and later Christmas dinner, a second Christmas dinner on boxing day. I make red cabbage in advance, we do our own roasties, carrots and parsnips but we buy almost everything in from M&S (save slaving away in December). A cooked ham in cola (done in the slow cooker) is a nice easy meal (for one day).

I would make it easy and less onerous on yourself as you want to enjoy Christmas as well. I am sure however you do it your mum will be just pleased to have time out of the kitchen and enjoy spending the day with you and her grand daughters.

My DM made a big deal of cooking everything at Christmas which she loved doing. When I started I cooked what I enjoyed and bought in the rest ie never made my own cranberry sauce. On Christmas Eve we get our Ooni pizza oven going and have pizza in the garden in the dark which is fun. We have a big breakfast on Christmas Day, cake for lunch and a dinner in late afternoon. I buy disposable foil roasting tins to save washing up.

This is a useful guide to timing for cooking the meal. You say what you will be cooking, when you want to serve it and how big your joint of meat is, and it tells you what you need to do when.

Forgot the link
https://ianrenton.github.io/roastdinner/

I love having a friends over for a Christmas dry run! We invite 2 other families over and I do a version of Xmas dinner but end of November. Helps test timings / serving dishes / how to load the oven etc. As they're my bestest mates I am far more relaxed and no family politics to throw into the mix.

For the actual Christmas itself:

We get all Xmas plates / glasses / tablecloths down on 1st Dec and that's the start of Christmastime - takes the huge climax away from the day.

Frozen pastries are indulgent but VERY easy for breakfast.

Cook and freeze pancakes for Boxing Day brunch.

Personally I prefer a later dinner so tea / presents / coffee & pastries / more presents / playtime then snacks / canapés. Turkey crown in then we all go for a walk. Back to finish all sides (all part cooked and frozen in early Dec)

Table is laid Xmas eve and basically stays that way until 27th