The Impossible Husband

[Andsoforth]

I don’t know what to get dh. He already has everything. After 18 years I’m distinctly low on thoughtful ideas. And he’s no bloody help. Mil, dm and db are also hassling me for suggestions.

Budget is around £100, and £20-30 for others.

He doesn’t enjoy sports generally - except for two extreme sports for which he has all the necessary kit.

He doesn’t drink.

He’s permanently on a diet (I’ve got some of his favourite chocolate for his stocking)

He doesn’t diy, garden, birdwatch or play board games.

He reads but only on his phone, doesn’t want a kindle and a gift card would be pointless.

He enjoys photography but already has all the kit. I’ve already exhausted the heated gillet, clever gloves, headlight options too.

There’s nothing left to “upgrade”
I love the man dearly but I am completely stumped.

Waterproof socks for outside photography sessions.
Handmade leather photography bags from Etsy.
Alexa is great for putting your own photos on and actually seeing them.
Go Pro.
Made to measure shirt from a tailor.
Lego - I don't understand this but most men I know like Lego sets.
Wine tasting.
Trip to see the Northern Lights (if you are rich).
A book on foraging.
Men are so difficult to buy for.

Stuff that has landed well here previously:

Membership to a museum (royal maritime/observatory was a big hit)
Various things from Sous Chef (did the 12 month subscription box one year which was a lot of fun!)
BBQ pizza oven
Brian Cox books (not ideal to read on a phone)
Nice headphones
Selection of non-alcoholic beers
Selection of non-alcoholic gins or grown up cordials
Charging stand to keep all his electicals tidy and charged.
Set of chargers for travelling, in a nice bag with a decent portable charging pack
A lovely dishpatch meal box (we like these because we have small kids so don’t get out much, but appreciate not that exciting for everyone else!)

TBH if he really doesn’t want or need anything, and won’t give any ideas, I’d go and do a big shop just for the food bank, take a pic of the laden trolley and tell him that’s his present from me. I’ve done that before as dh’s present to me - had to do it myself, though - without a detailed list he wouldn’t know what’s best to buy.

@DepartmentOfMysteries That sounds lovely.
I’m going to file that one away for an anniversary.

@Whatnextarghhhhhh Chargers for travelling could be a could one, perhaps combined with the strappy organiser thingie @SheWoreYellow suggested. Maybe I could put together a little grab and go travel bag for the essentials.

I have to say that you lot are completely awesome!

Ember mug for coffee
Nespresso minipresso (makes coffee from pods and hot water without electricity, could combine the outdoor stuff and love of coffee?)

DH and I don't exchange gifts anymore for a couple of reasons.

DH is useless at it and if I'm having to be prescriptive then there's no 'joy' in receiving it. He either wants ridiculously expensive things (which he never gets because he doesn't want them enough) or nothing. He doesn't like 'surprises' and can't fake enthusiasm if he actively doesn't like/want it. He also find it really stressful and would rather have nothing and focus on those that do enjoy it.

I can never think of anything as I've got what I need - I'm not into fashion, makeup, jewellery, drinking, pampering or any of the usual things aimed at women. (Not that I want beer, socks or shaving kits either!!)

However, if we want to go to a comedy show, festival, meal out, theatre, etc. we book it when we see it. Spending time together is more meaningful for us than opening a gift on a day of the year.

(And, yes, it's the same for birthdays.)

Buy some sexy lingerie, send kids to G’ma and give him the night of his life. I had the same problem with my husband, I gift wrapped myself. It didn’t happen Christmas Day (a couple of days later) He loved it!

Luxury socks? Clothes? Shoes? What sort of diet is he on? There might be posh food that is allowed?

Does he ever frame any of his photographs? If not, can you find one that you also like, have it enlarged and framed? Did that for my DH one year and he absolutely loved it.

We have really enjoyed our National Trust membership - some places like NT beaches/walking areas we just use for the car parking. Great photographic opportunities.

I read on here many years ago about just replacing or upgrading often used items. So every year i check out slippers, dressing gown, lounge pants, various coloured t-shirts, jumpers, favourite shirts, gloves, scarves etc

We tend to do trips instead if nothing specific needed - DH is getting a weekend in Krakow for his Xmas and a few nights in Liverpool is my birthday present

Speaking from the perspective of a husband who has everything I need, and the things I might want are so ridiculously expensive that I can't expect anybody to buy them...have you thought about making him something that he couldn't buy? I know I'd appreciate that a lot more than money being spent.

I mean...we're not short of cash by a long shot, but this year I'm designing and making a custom Spirograph set for my wife (3D printer...always gotta find a use for gadgets), just because she's been talking a lot about stuff she loved as a kid and she's always been fascinated by geometric designs.

Readly subscription. Tons of magazines to access on your phone or tablet. Ridiculous amount of genres of magazines, I got a 3 month subscription for my dad one year and he signed up for it and has had it ever since. Think it's about £8 a month. Includes well known magazine titles.

I don't know if this helps but darling father in law and hubby are nightmares to buy for.

Their hobbies are fishing, photography and making model airplanes.

One year, out of desperation, I got two hamper baskets and filled them with the following:

Favourite sweets, mints, biscuits (Kendal mint cake is a favourite)
Small notebook,
Pens and pencils (don't forget rubbers & sharpeners)
A small first aid kit,
Cup a soups, (DD brought them both new flasks)
Glues and apoxy resins,
Math paper (for scaled drawings and plans)
Embroidery threads, hooks and feathers.
Mini screwdriver set.
A small set of paints.
Brushes.

Grandkids give socks, scarves, gloves, feet and hand warmers.

One year they got nice leather bound portfolio folders and some frames for their favourite photos.

We've had stars named for them both as they also like stargazing.

This year we have framed family crests and histories because the surname is a well known Clan from Scotland.

Hubby's birthday is the 10th of January - this year's present is a small square of land in Scotland to make him a Lord or Sir.

What about an 'on the day you were born, this happened'?

If he uses a printer, what about inks and different photo papers?

What about a voucher or pro lesson's in chosen hobby?

Apologies if I've covered previous ideas.
Posted as ideas for others because I have a handful that a buggers to buy for!!

My DH is the same! My DS treated him to a Supercar day which he enjoyed .Also maybe Afternoon Tea voucher, a Waitrose voucher or similar Deli type store.What about a comedy voucher or good old Deliveroo or similar(you can share this too!)

As someone who photographs I can assure you, you never have all the gear you want. But a game changer for indoor photography was a light. It also works outdoors and is waterproof. Comes with a few filters that attach magnetically and fits most tripods. It is cool because it's what's called daylight balanced. Meaning what you light with it looks like it is in sunlight when it isnt. There are various options but I'd recommend a Lume Cube 2.0.
Small and powerful and rechargeable. About £80.00 and has buttons or can be controlled wirelessly by phone app.

It really is amazing. Especially for macro photography. And the good thing is you can buy more making a really excellent light system. And they are tough cast aluminium.

Buy here. I've used them twice and they are the cheapest I could find

Photospcecialist - www.photospecialist.co.uk/lume-cube-2-0-single-pack

Takes a few days as they import from Holland. Worth every penny.

Good luck

@Trafspelledbackwards Thank you for that link. I have just sent it to DP and sent him away with his lunch.
I now have a few hours to carry on getting things sorted without him under my feet AND I will be putting on the Christmas tunes as well!!
Thank you 💕

Hahahaha cool.