Bought the wrong Barbie Dreamhouse

[EJ72]

This is actually about a birthday present, but posted here for traffic.

Ok, this is going to sound mad but please be gentle with me.

DD turned 9 today. She’s a young 9, and we bought her the Barbie Dreamhouse, which she is delighted with. Never thought I’d buy such a big load of plastic, but I’ve realised she absolutely loves it and will definitely play with it so all good…

Except I’ve realised we’ve bought the wrong one. I’ve been horrendously busy with my teaching job all term (crazy stress), DH bought this a good couple of months ago on Amazon. I thought, ok that’s fine, job done, though why TF did I not do my own research, as tbh, can never trust DH to buy anything… and now I realise he has bought the 2020 model (only available on Amazon, nowhere else) and my DD has been showing me pics for a few weeks of the one she really wanted. It’s much MUCH nicer (not that I’ve admitted that to her). Just annoyed at myself for letting DH deal with this. He’s irritatingly only interested in getting a bargain and I failed to realise why this one was cheaper 😞

utterly first world problem

Please tell me a) to get over myself b) flog it (beautifully built today) on eBay / local forum and buy the other one (Smyths at £179.99 right now - pretty much what we paid for the old one). PS we don’t buy many things for my DD so it’s not like she’s used to being ‘spoiled’ with loads of stuff…this is the first time she’s been given something she was v keen on. I just feel I’ve messed up and feel sad for her. As she knows it’s not quite the nice one.

I would buy the other one. It is her dream toy, so I really wouldn't want sadness associated with it.

Same. Don't get my mother started on Sindy. Even worse.

I quite like the fact that 2020s Barbie has TWO dream houses. I've got Destiny's Child's Independent Women going round in my head now.

I was this child too. It might not be worth the money to you now, but would that change if you saw her wee face totally light up? If you can afford it is a better measure of whether buying it is a good idea. Lots of toys are just a ripoff, but honestly I am happier being ripped off than my son ever experiencing those feelings?

The newer L shaped one looks like it would be awkward to get to the rooms with sofa & bunks with the slide & pool installed.

I think I'd offer to pimp up the one you have with accessories & add ons, see what you can both find second hand like shopping for own home. Perhaps she's not as disappointed now she's had chance to play with it.

You will 100% sell it on eBay! My daughter wants the older version for Christmas as she preferred it, and iv bid on loads of them over the past couple weeks. They all seem to go for around £130-£140 ish, really really popular!!
if they sell the newer version on the entertainer, try and get a birthday discount which will give you 20% off and you can won’t lose much money!

@mynameischloe Are you able to get it for her this Christmas?

we can't always see why someone wants x and we think it's not worth it, but it is for the feelings it gives them.

not getting someone something they want (when you could) it makes them feel bad. it's one thing if you can't afford it, but it's quite another when you get the think that you think is better/more 'worth it', cheaper (when you could buy the other)

Love isn't buying presents, but it is listening, and IF buying a present, showing you've listened and got the one THEY wanted.

@EJ72 How much the first one cost us irrelevant now, it's bought & paid for.

Do you have space for both houses?

If you do, I'd get the other one today & a barbie friend to ME it would be worth every Penny. She was clear which one she really wanted and it's not her fault DH bought the wrong one. Like others have said, you've only got a short while left to buy things like this that will make her SO happy, they soon move away from new toys (even if they play with old ones) onto tech, fashion & money & though they're pleased with it, there's never that childish delight like getting a toy your heart desires.

If you don't have space for both, sell the other on eBay/market place. DD inadvertently got 2 for her birthday didn't she😉 (don't advertise it saying it wasn't the one she'd asked for!!)

as someone else said, get the other one first!! In case there's a shortage before Christmas.

so many unknowns though, would DD be upset at you selling the one she has? As a child I'd probably have been happier keeping the original & not getting the other one if it meant selling the one I already had. I'd have lived to get the second 'as well'. Not through greed, but because I'd be sad about the original not feeling good enough, msybe not being looked after etc. I've always been 'too soft!!'

I would be switching it for the right one. I'm not sure it's the right life lesson in resilience tbh but I couldn't help myself. I would want my child to know I cared enough to get it right.

That's so lovely ❤️

I know it's first world problems, but what happened here is that your husband economised to your daughter's detriment. He didn't understand that, to a little girl, there's a difference between these two toys. It's not important to him, so why should it be important to her? But it IS important to her. He saved a small amount of money by dismissing her desire. It would be as if he wanted tickets to a particular football game and you got him tickets as a birthday present to a different football game and said, well, it's still football, what's the problem, what does it matter which teams are playing? These were ten pound cheaper!

And as you point out, she's going to outgrow dolls fairly soon. On your husband's behalf, imagine if this were his one chance to go to a live football game, and you got him the wrong tickets.

I am all in favor of being thrifty with toy purchases if you can't afford otherwise. It's how I grew up and the habit of being financially sensible has helped me be financially secure in my present life.

But if you can afford it, and you have this chance to give a toy that will give your child joy, then I think substituting the toy she wants, for the toy that will unnecessarily save a few pounds, sends a subtle message that girlish concerns are just not important.

So I think it just depends on your family situation, what message you want to send your daughter, and how she receives that message.

I’m getting a bit paranoid as I’ve bought my daughter the 2020 one for Christmas, she’s not asked for a particular one.

is the 2020 significantly worse than the 2022 one?

No, they are pretty similar. My 6 year old specifically wanted the older version as she liked the pool on the middle floor and the bedroom better 🤷‍♀️ If she hasn’t asked for a specific one I wouldn’t worry, both are massive so have the ‘wow’ factor!

I agree with this.

I grew up in a poor household and we had to make do with what presents we got-
and it was absolutely fine, I had a lot of second hand toys and they were great !

BUT - if you can afford to buy the specific toy which has been asked for then why not get it ? Especially if your DD doesn’t ask for much (mine are the same , so it’s even nicer
to treat them when they do ask for something!)

@Hiphipho thank you. The pool being more accessible and not blocking the bottom floor was what I thought was better too.

thank you for calming my nerves 😂

The older one looks better to me too. And I'd get a car or scooter to go with it.

I just can't believe the number of posters thinking the Op should swap the houses as if a £170-200 for a toy was nothing.

@Dinoteeth she has a jeep, which is why I thought that one too.

thanks for validating my first thoughts!

Absolutely no one has said it like it's 'nothing' and yes it's a lot of money to spend, especially twice over. But it wasn't her DD's fault her Dad didn't get the one she asked for, she's been grateful & polite about the one she did get, she didn't stamp about because it wasn't the right one.

Now IF they can afford to get the right one, why wouldn't you?! It was the Dad that didn't listen!!!

she rarely asks for anything, but had her heart set on this particular one, I don't get why, if you were able, you wouldn't fix your mistake.

if you want a soft pink wool jumper for Christmas and (you've told DH over & over, given him a link etc) & DH buys you a hot pink acrylic number, because it's £20 cheaper or he likes the colour better - when he could afford the one you actually wanted, would you feel valued & listened to, or actually pretty crap??

@Plaidparty if she hasn't asked for a specific one, I'm sure she'll be delighted with the one you've got. I'm sure they both have different 'good bits' and different 'not so good' bits and children will agree & disagree over them depending on how they like to play!

I still remember getting my Barbie house for Christmas. It was the 70's, so nothing like they are now!!! Basically a centre upright in the middle for 4 bits that slid onto it, giving you an Ariel view of a X.😅😂😂. Thing I remember most was my Dad 'building' it with me, putting all the stickers on & setting up all the rooms. I played with it for years & years. Good memories 😍

get it

What did you decide to do?

@EJ72
Did you get the one she wanted?

I think you should list it on marketplace, with an explanation. Someone may prefer to buy one nearly new and built, especially if you offer to drop off to them if they don't drive. Then if it sells you buy the other one?

Hi everyone and @Tirrrrred @ThatshallotBaby ! Thank you for all your support and interest. Sorry I went quiet on the thread. Well, we DID buy the new one, yay (I wanted to get it at what I thought was a Black Friday price) and now listed the old one on eBay tonight. It sold within half an hour at the Buy it Now price - yay again! (though of course DH now thinks we listed it too low!). So everyone is happy! Thank you so much. I was honestly moved by all those people who told me to go for it and shared similar feelings / stories…thank you 🙏 daughter delighted too x

Yay great news - and sorry for what may have come across as an abrupt ‘get it’

Aww that's a great updat OP, I bet her little face was brilliant ❤️

Glad to hear it.

Do you want a silver love heart shaped locket?