If you’ve bought 15+ gifts for your child/ren where are you from?

[PinkyU]

I have a theory that different parts of the UK view giving Christmas gifts differently (based solely on anecdotes and experience, so very scientific).

I’m from the Scottish central belt and don’t know anyone, regardless of income (in fact more so for working class families), who gift less than 12/15+ presents to their children, nor do any of the NI parents I know.

Conversely my experience of English families (almost exclusively on here) is that there’s competitive minimal gifting regardless of financial situation.

Is it different traditions across the nations?

Prove or disprove my very scientific theory.

(Apologies to the Welsh, I have no experience but am happy to be informed)

DD is getting a new laptop, a printer, AirPods, an electric scooter, a few Lego sets, a camera and some games

I find this so bizarre. A laptop would be a main gift for my DC...I might get them a few extra little bits but not other big gifts like a scooter or camera too. The year my ds got an Xbox that was it apart from his stocking and gifts from other relatives. It's not even a money thing. I just think it's so incredibly spoilt to receive several expensive items.

SW England here

My DC get:

3 main presents
1 joke main present (something quirky, make them laugh, they didn't request but we think they would like

A small stocking of 5 small bits (magazine, chocolate Santa, bath bomb etc)

A sack of 10 mid range presents. This includes things they need (PJs, slippers, posh undies etc), consumables (these days nice chocs and alcohol!) and a few bits they request. However, cost of these bits individually are usually under £20.

So 20 presents in total, but spread over the day. Stockings historically opened when they wake at stupid o'clock. These days though, more likely to be opened when they roll in drink after midnight.

Sacks opened on our beds when the DC wake. Thankfully not until 8am these days

Main presents opened later in the day.

So out of curiousity do you not let your kids have the things they want if you can afford it?

Say your kid wants a phone because theres is a 4 years old and has a cracked screen and a laptop because although theres though it works is getting frustraitingly slow (two fairly average things for a teen to own) and they want a printer to print out things from the laptop they have to do without two or wait 24 months for the other 2 just because you refuse to buy more than once thing at once?

I mean I couldn't personally afford to buy those things unless they where cheaper second hand but if my kid wanted them I would try to find secondhand affordable ones for him I wouldnt make him 'not' have one for some sense of superiority in only buying 1 gift.

We don’t equate amount spent with showing how much we love the DC and prefer to spend money on interesting holidays and fulfilling hobbies.

I dont either but unfortunately I can't afford to spend money on interesting holidays and fulfilling hobbies (except dancing) so Christmas is the one time of year where they receive a lot of gifts. I wish I was in a position where I could take my children on holidays every year and not worry when an appliance breaks or the car needs repairs. I can't buy my children a laptop on an average week day or expensive trainers and clothes. Christmas is the one time of year where they are spoiled and I won't feel guilty for that. What I do feel guilty for is that I can't give them holidays and have to say no I can't afford that this month about stuff that families with money could buy without a second thought.

From NI, working class and grew up in a working class family. As a kid I got loads and I always get my 3 loads too. They don't get much throughout the year toy wise so Christmas is my time to spoil them, and I save all through the year to do so.
My mum and her siblings were born in the 60s/70s and they always only got one or two small items.

That’s absolutely fine for you to have that opinion. I do as I like for my children, as you do for yours.

Exactly! Notice how it's always judgemental comments about people buying lots of gifts but it's rare you will find a judgemental comment about people only buying 1 or 2. And yes I've already made this point and I make it every year because it's true.

So out of curiousity do you not let your kids have the things they want if you can afford it?

Of course. It's not about money. My DD may come shopping with me and point out lots of things she wants...I can afford them but of course I don't get her everything she wants... because I don't want obnoxious spoilt entitled brats.

Sil is wealthy and buys her DC ridiculously expensive things. Her teenage dd once scoffed that her phone wasn't that expensive and only cost £500. Yuk.

Also I know there are comments that judge people who don't buy much at Xmas I've read them myself but compare them to the amount judging those who buy loads they are few and far between.

'We don’t equate amount spent with showing how much we love the DC and prefer to spend money on interesting holidays and fulfilling hobbies.'

also agree this statement is the height of ignorant privilage... it litrally says we don't equate amount spent with showing love but these are the things we spend far more money on because I'm superior and feel I love my kids more than you thanks to all our money allowing us to spread luxuarys out all through the year.

As said many who buy more are not spending more... my budget is £140, that double what you spend at xmas but that extra £70 spread out across 12 months is £5.83 a month (£1.32 a week) what clubs is that paying for? certainly wont keep a pony and riding classes or a place on the gymnastics troup and equiptment.

Also I would love to know what fantastic interesting holidays (the s even indicates plural) you can get for a whole family for £70? thats 2 night in a travelodge at non peak time and petrol to get there costs far more.

Yep! And it always means the children are “spoilt, obnoxious brats”
No, some of us still manage to parent well enough to raise kind, grateful children AND give them as many gifts as we please:

My sil DC are polite and pleasant people...but they have an ingrained entitlement and disconnect from the real world. Hence why her DD genuinely thinks she has a cheap phone because it 'only' cost £500

My experiance has been the exact opposit.

Theres those who had less due to circumstance or narcassistic parents that tend to be spoilt (rude tantrumy) because they see everyone else getting what they are denighed.

And there are those that are raised in privilage so dont need those things at xmas because they are showered with it all through the year, who grow up to continue their ignorant preachings for ever blind to the privilage they have.

The kids that got a lot and didnt feel they missed out but thing may have been second hand/hand me downs but only got it at special times like xmas not constantly tend to be pretty well rounded... they are jealous chasing the dream getting into debt keeping up with the joneses but equally aren't privilaged and ignorant looking down there noses and throwing around words like 'tat'.

• they aren't jealous

That is 100% their parenting. My DC are in a private school surrounded by a lot of wealth and get to experience lots of brilliant things yet aren’t obnoxious, spoilt or entitled.

Same area as you Op. 12-15 presents. Can’t say I know anyone who gifts any less either. Not expensive gifts though, as my little one is only 3.

That is 100% their parenting. My DC are in a private school surrounded by a lot of wealth and get to experience lots of brilliant things yet aren’t obnoxious, spoilt or entitled

As someone who went to private school I can agree with you that not everyone there is spoilt or obnoxious but what I will say is that often people who are surrounded by that wealth have unrealistic perceptions of the world and certain expectations. It's not about being a Veruca Salt impressionist...it's a subtle belief of what is "normal"...but, I digress.

Although I'm not talking specifically about your children obviously...more in a broad sense.

There's a post on this thread though where a poster is saying she budgets £1500 per child and has three! This is absolutely nuts to me. I wouldn't spend that if I was a millionaire. Obviously people can buy their kids whatever they want..I find it odd. However, Christmas is not a big deal to me.

Im also from Scottish central belt, 95% of my friends and family do 15+ presents each including myself.

My kids are getting 8 presents each plus some blocks to argue about the rest of the year share. Total cost is £100 and £95 and I felt so miserly until my oldest (6 who got a Nintendo switch and every U-rated game in stock @£35-55 each plus a decked out doll house as big as she was) asked that we ask Santa ever so nicely about “more unicorn bath bombs to make Christmas really special” …. the unicorn bath bombs I bought from the pound shop on X-mas eve. It was her favourite thing.

Fucking books this year I swear to God!

Sorry to add we are in SE England

but what I will say is that often people who are surrounded by that wealth have unrealistic perceptions of the world and certain expectations. It's not about being a Veruca Salt impressionist...it's a subtle belief of what is "normal"...but, I digress.

This is very true @Comedycook but the thing is people generally say it about those a rung or two above them on the socioeconomic ladder without really stopping to think that their own perceptions and expectations are unrealistic to lots of other people too. Everyone’s normal is just that to them.

Which is why every year we get posters shuddering in horror and declaring that more than this number of gifts or that amount spent is obscene/spoiling children and so on. Often in a very judgmental and superior tone but without stopping to think for a single moment that they spend multiples more on their own dc through the entire year than the 15 plus presents parents could possibly afford even if they bought their dc nothing but a packet of underpants and a chocolate orange at Christmas.

Oh and often when pressed the I wouldn’t dream of spending more even though I could afford it posters will concede that their dc do have the smartphones/tablets/bikes etc as well as their enriching hobbies and holidays, it’s just that they’re either bought “as needed” (no acknowledgement that they and their dc are pretty fortunate that they can affect to buy these things any random week of the year) OR are paid for by generous GPs (no acknowledgment that GPs paying for the big ticket items/expensive hobbies is effectively subsidising the families lifestyle in a way that few WC GPs could afford to do).

I often find children who are raised to be snobs and look down their noses at people are bigger brats than children who get lots of Christmas presents.

They're not mutually exclusive