Avoiding planning work nights out, Secret Santa etc

[saywha]

Does anyone else find themselves (sometimes unwittingly) elected to the post of workplace Christmas organiser? Do you enjoy it, resent it or a bit of both?

I seem to have ended up taking on this role a few times and this year I'm heart set on not doing it. I don't think there will be any pressure or expectation from colleagues so that's not a problem. Tbh I think I'm my own worst enemy because I get the urge to start planning but usually end up totally resenting the rod I've made for my own back!

So my intention is not to mention anything at all, take a step back and relax. I'm honestly jealous of people who don't feel compelled to do these things, teach me your ways!

Just say no.

The only secret for me was, after doing each of the above once, I knew never in a million years would I do either wretched, thankless task again.

Lots of women fall into the habit of doing ‘wife work’ at work. So, organising social occasions, doing collections, buying gifts, sorting leaving cards. That sort of thing. It’s very common and I’ve always just refused to do it.

Yeah, just say no thanks on repeat.

I always seem to end up organising all the social events, I don't mind doing it. Would just be easier if everyone did what I needed them to do without me chasing them. Like, I told you 2 months ago I need your deposit! I shouldn't have to chase you the day before, having had to pay your share out of my own pocket!!

Don’t bring it up or engage in any conversations that you hear discussing it.

If you are asked directly to run it, say “oh no I won’t have time for that this year. I did it last year so someone else can do this time.”

Do you want nights out and Secret Santa? If yes....well then someone has to organise it.
If you don't really care about it - then just say "no".

I seem to fall into this role among my various groups of friends.

I've just stopped, nobody else has taken up the baton, so events have also stopped.

I noticed during the pandemic that I was almost always the first to contact anybody and when I stopped, realised that nobody else bothered.

So, my diary is less busy, I have less 'friends' but I've made my peace that it was largely one sided.....

I've always made a point of resistance, too. Don't want to be the workplace mum.

Don't engage. Don't discuss. If someone asks, say no or "I'm willing to join in if someone else organises but I'm not in a position to organise this year".