Is it OK if I scream?

[Swedes2Turnips1]

We are having bil, sil, mil and two very elderly relatives for christmas lunch. When my DP and BIL were a bit younger they spent many a Christmas with their parents as guests of this older couple - we thought we would like to repay their kindness by having them for Christmas lunch. They live half an hour drive away so need picking up and dropping off after lunch. SIL phoned a few minutes ago to ask whether she could do anything towards Christmas day. I said yes, could you drop off elderly couple after lunch and we will pick them up before lunch. She (sil) said it was not the best day for me to invite the elderly couple for lunch and could I not have invited them another day? They have to drive in their car to get to us anyway (sil doesn't drive so it will be bil doing the driving), I don't see what the huge problem is to be honest. I am steaming - how dare she tell us who we can and can't invite to our house for lunch. She is pregnant and told me that she is more worried about her pregnancy than I might have been as this will be an "only child" whereas I have 4 children. I did say "Oh you mean if one of mine gets run over it doesn't really matter because I've got three others" and she just said yes wtf I want to scream.

just make sure you spit in her sprouts .

You are lovely to invite this couple. She is rude and self-centred.

Ask BIL directly, since he used to spend xmas with the couple he will feel kindly towards them.

oh she sounds absolutely delightful!

spit in her sprouts, roll them on the floor a bit and give her the lumpy bits of the gravy

Scream all you like. It won't change the fact that she's a cow!

Doesn't she know that Christmas is the season of peace and goodwill to all men?

Tell her to get over herself. Surely she realises that this Christmas day will undoubtedly mean a lot to the elderly relatives. Give her some grief and play on her concience; after all if they are really elderly this could be their last Christmas.........

Scream away.

I think that inviting the elderly couple was a lovely gesture.

Your SIL's comment implying that your children are more 'dispensible' was tactless to say the least.

However, I know that there were times in my pregnancies that I overreacted horribly to things (the time when I sobbed uncontrollably in a swimming pool because a boy hit me on the head with a frisbee but didn't apologise springs to mind...). Your SIL is being very uncharitable about this couple, but she may be feeling wretched.

Could you get DP to call his brother? BIL might be completely cool about the lift and he might also feel the need to talk to someone to about his wife's erratic behaviour...

Good luck!

Patsy

Thanks all. Have taken a few deep breaths now. DP called before SIL to say he was going to the pub for a couple of post work drinkies and would be half an hour later than normal. At that point I was in very bouncy Christmas mood. He walked in the door after her call and the mood has been completely destroyed. He says she is just incredibly gauche and rude and that I should just laugh about her instead of feeling upset.

Patsycline - Oh I was irrational too in pregnancy at times! But sadly she is always like this.

You are good people. Your sil is being a knob. I'm all for cutting her hormones some slack but at the comment about only children somehow being more precious.

one day she is going to remember that comment about her baby being more precious than your children and cringe... or at least you would hope that's what she'll think when her hormones have returned to normality.