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Original poster

MIL got main present for DS

53 replies

FarFarAwayLand137 · 20/12/2021 09:53

Back in November my MIL asked what DS5 might want for Christmas and I mentioned a Lego train set he had seen in the shops so she got that as a joint present with FIL and BIL.
Since then DS has visited Santa and asked for this and told everyone that Santa will get him a Lego train set. Now I'm worried that on Christmas morning he will be disappointed that it isn't under the tree and Santa hasn't got him the one thing he asked for.
MIL will visit later in the day and obviously bring his present but what do I say if he asks why Santa hasn't got it for him?

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 20/12/2021 10:52

Santa would leave a note here.

'I know you wanted me to bring you a Lego train set, but my elves tell me someone else has already bought you one! So we thought long and hard and made you this instead'

And get another Lego set or something else from his list from Santa.

NuffSaidSam · 20/12/2021 10:53

Also, in future years get in and manage it early. Find out the Santa request first and only tell other people stuff that isn't the Santa request.

stayathomer · 20/12/2021 10:59

Just do a big 'hmm I wonder why' then move on with playing with presents. Then a big 'wow santa must have known!' Then your mil, fil etc still gets kudos (I don't agree with people saying say Santa left it with mil as they should be acknowledged!) And I agree, you and your family sound lovely! Merry Christmas op!!

underneaththeash · 20/12/2021 11:06

@Wheelerdeeler

I asked for colouring pencils one Christmas and santa never brought them. I was gutted.

My aunt gave them later in day but I will ne er forget the disappointed feeling.

Tell him he's getting it from mil in advance

This.
Biscuitandacuppa · 20/12/2021 11:11

Santa was the delivery man for my dd, he gave her one small present but the rest were from family. Never understood why all the presents came from Santa, surely the children must wonder why their mum and dad doesn’t buy them a present but the rest of the family do?

1WeekTillChristmas · 20/12/2021 11:15

And this is why, Santa shouldnt do big presents

JisForJellyfish · 20/12/2021 11:21

Tell him in advance Santa only brings stockings. Requests have to be small enough to fit. Although here it's a stocking full if surprises, requests are direct to us. Smile and say if he is lucky someone may buy him the lego train set though!

JustJoinedRightNow · 20/12/2021 11:23

I agree with this post.
You should say something to him along the lines of “guess what! Granny is going to get you the lego train so you get to think up something else you might like to ask Santa for!”

In our house, the list for Santa is only a wishlist and they usually get one or two things off the list, but they know they won’t get everything.

JustJoinedRightNow · 20/12/2021 11:24

Sorry I meant to quote @Wheelerdeeler’s post there!

jellybe · 20/12/2021 11:51

We have always reminded our kids through out the build up to Christmas that Father Christmas will bring them things he knows that they will like even if it isn't off their list. Stockings in our house have always been smaller things and big presents come from us/ family as I don't think it's fair on the gift giver to not get the thanks.

Maybe ask him what else he would like off Father Christmas and put it in a letter to go with his stocking so that he gets something he wants from Father Christmas and then MIL can bring the train when you see her.

madisonbridges · 20/12/2021 11:53

Don't give away the surprise that granny's bringing it! Just say Santa leaves things at everyone's houses so it might come later.

mam0918 · 20/12/2021 11:54

DON'T say Santa left the gift at nans house... that gift is from IL for him, you can not take someone else's gift and claim it was from someone else (mythical or not) it's basic etiquette.

I would simply explain Santa doesn't bring expensive lego sets to people but maybe you or nan or someone might get it for him.

NotMyselfWithoutCoffee · 20/12/2021 12:12

Santa left the lego set in his workshop, so Mil has gone to get it and will bring it round later. Xmas Smile

CommanderBurnham · 20/12/2021 12:14

I just tell mine that we tell Santa what we've already bought so he doesn't buy anything else.

CommanderBurnham · 20/12/2021 12:14

Sorry any duplications

wrappedupforchristmas · 20/12/2021 12:14

In our house they have the bigger items from us under the tree and Father Christmas does smaller stocking presents.

WinnerofDecember · 20/12/2021 12:24

@Comefromaway

If anyone had refused and it was the one thing they had asked/were hoping for I'd have spoilt the surprise and told them though.
Hmm I'd be pretty pissed off at this actually. It's really rather rude of you, in many ways.
Colouringaddict · 20/12/2021 12:45

Please don’t spoil the surprise and tell him nanny has the train set, Remind him that Santa drops off presents to everyone’s house and sometimes they get muddled up. Hopefully he will be so excited by his other gifts that will keep him occupied until they get to give him the Lego

andweallsingalong · 20/12/2021 12:55

DD's birthday is in Jan and I've always managed her expectations by telling her she might not get everything on her list and that some might be come for her birthday or from different people or not at all.

Stopped giving main presents from santa years ago when I read something that made me realise how wrong it is for different kids to ask Santa for the same things, only the better off kids to get it leaving the kids from poorer families to feel unworthy.

We're not well off, but luckily between us and grandparents we tend to get everything. So far dcs requests have been reasonably modest.

Santa brings chocolate coins, stocking fillers and an activity game for the whole family to play.

SocialConnection · 20/12/2021 14:05

Tell him the stocking is from Santa. Tell him who gave him the big gifts so he understands the real people who care for him spent time thinking what he'd love and getting it for him. And understanding how to say thank you.

Enough with the 'what's Santa bringing you'.

It's unfair on the kids whose families can't afford the big things others can and confuses those who can't understand why he's not brought him as much as his friends.

Tell more truth.

Lovemusic33 · 20/12/2021 14:11

I don’t see the issue, surely you have got him something else that I’m sure he will love, he might feel a bit disappointed for a few hours but will then get an amazing surprise when MIL gifts him the train set?

Iwanttobestronger · 20/12/2021 14:17

We always find that come Christmas Day our children (5&8) don’t mind which presents comes from who or where. They have never questioned it and occasionally they haven’t had much from their actual list and they haven’t been upset, just delighted with what they have received. Which does sound a bit rose tinted but I think there is so much going on they are just happy in the fun of the day.

SenecaFallsRedux · 20/12/2021 14:19

DON'T say Santa left the gift at nans house... that gift is from IL for him, you can not take someone else's gift and claim it was from someone else (mythical or not) it's basic etiquette.

Speaking as a grandmother, I heartily agree with this.

Toplowlight · 20/12/2021 14:20

Almost every single Santa dilemma I’ve ever read on mumsnet would be solved if people told their kids Santa brings your stocking but not your main presents.

(Sorry, I know that’s not helpful now…)

HerbErtlinger · 20/12/2021 14:20

I like PP's response of Xmas isn't over until bedtime and then just redirect until MIL gets there. I wouldn't tell him MIL has bought the lego, I'd be pretty disappointed if I bought an expensive gift and someone had ruined the surprise. My DD won't be getting her main gift until the afternoon, I'm pretty sure the excitement of the gift will override any feelings of disappointment in the morning