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Christmas

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Original poster

Daughters have been reading my notebook with lists of their presents in

27 replies

olliepolly · 18/12/2007 14:16

Feeling really upset they have spoilt the magic of christmas.
They are 9 and 7 years.
They have asked for nintendo ds and i have got them.
Have also read about smaller stocking fillers.
Not sure if older one still believes in FC middle one probably and son age 4 definately.
Am thinking about leaving ds's out of stocking and giving them later in the day ie making them wait.
I think I am upset really because it has spoilt it for me .

OP posts:

AwayInAMunker · 18/12/2007 14:17

Tell them that they've blown Christmas and make them take all the presents to the charity shop now.

AwayInAMunker · 18/12/2007 14:17

Well, that's probably quite irrational and unhelpful, but I'd be cross too.

mumofmonSTARsOfBethlehem · 18/12/2007 14:19

my first reaction was why did you write them down??

Its themselves they have spoiled it for, now there are no surprises for them

paulaplumpbottom · 18/12/2007 14:19

I would be to.

RudolphtheBluenosesaintdeer · 18/12/2007 14:20

Can't you tell them that its just your wish-list for them? You know, things you thought they might like for you to send to Santa?

You could take a few things back to the shops and exchange for a few bits that they don't know about to make it more plausable ...

moljam · 18/12/2007 14:21

did you leave it somewhere or did they search for it?children search for and feel presents,thats what they do!
i think its bit strong saying theyve spoilt magic of xmas-its not just about the presents!could you get few extra bits to stick in and not write them down?

thebecster · 18/12/2007 14:21

I'd have a serious talk with them about privacy - they wouldn't like it if you read their diaries (and quite rightly), and they must have known they shouldn't have been reading that notebook. I don't think you can punish them via Christmas presents as it will upset your youngest and spoil things even more on the day. But I think they should have a punishment which happens before Christmas Day(so that it's all water under the bridge by the day itself). Maybe they should have to help you with the preparations - writing addresses on your Xmas cards or something? I'm sorry, that must have been really upsetting to find they'd done that after you'd gone to so much trouble & expense. Kids...

Bink · 18/12/2007 14:22

Poor you - bet you are agonising over where you left the notebook, now, too?

I'd expect the 9yo to be herself feeling weirdly upset about it too - maybe you should take her aside & tell her how sad it makes you feel, and ask her to protect the little ones - sort of take her into your confidence.

Would that help? Depends a bit on her personality, I suppose.

ItWasOnlyAWintersTellus · 18/12/2007 14:23

Did they know what was in there? And even if they did, they are a bit young to have the control not to look - aren't they? I'm intrigued by the bags under DH's side of the bed. I'm not looking of course, but still...

I'd be livid with myself for leaving it where they could find it. I don't think I'd blame them though...

"Tell them that they've blown Christmas and make them take all the presents to the charity shop now. "

soapbox · 18/12/2007 14:23

But how would they know that the notebook has a list of presents in it in the first place?

Perhaps they shouldn't have read your notebook, but they were probably shocked to see your list of things in it.

I suspect they are pretty shocked too tbh, as they probably did believe Santa bought it all, and now they have the proof that he doesn't.

I can't see it as anything to punish them for, although perhaps a chat about not reading other people's things might be in order!

luckylady74 · 18/12/2007 14:25

i would be horrified if this happened to me, but i know i would have looked when i was a child - bink is right - she'll be feeling awful now.

ItWasOnlyAWintersTellus · 18/12/2007 14:26

Pretty sure that it will have spoilt it for them too

AwayInAMunker · 18/12/2007 14:28

Can I just say I was kidding about presents to the charity shop? No need for the

RudolphtheBluenosesaintdeer · 18/12/2007 14:28

Yes - definitely spoilt more for them

Really think any punishment for them would be very unjust ... better to seek a way to fix it ...

ItWasOnlyAWintersTellus · 18/12/2007 14:28

Oh, OK.

doggiesayswoof · 18/12/2007 14:29

I would have looked as a child, and then felt awful and guilt-ridden etc. In fact I remember looking for and finding hidden presents a couple of times and then feeling shit. You can't stop yourself at that age. I would agree about getting the serious talk and any punishments over well before xmas.

And I wouldn't bother trying to exchange presents for something different! They looked - they need to learn not to - them's the breaks.

doggiesayswoof · 18/12/2007 14:31

God that sounded overly harsh actually, re-reading it.

RudolphtheBluenosesaintdeer · 18/12/2007 14:31

Thats a little harsh - they're only young and it is Christmas

Maybe now is not the time for those sort of 'lessons'

RudolphtheBluenosesaintdeer · 18/12/2007 14:32

x-posts

Weegle · 18/12/2007 14:33

I would have done this as a child. I went in search of "evidence" around xmas time, I seriously couldn't help myself. My sister didn't have the same compulsion. I wouldn't punish them, I would make sure there is no way the same thing could happen again - I write my list in an excel spreadsheet on computer - you could password protect that. Have a chat about privacy by all means but I certainly wouldn't have deemed I'd done anything wrong at 7. Maybe 9, not 7.

moljam · 18/12/2007 14:37

can i just say-i still feel presents!!!im 30 next year

AndATigerschickInAPearTree · 18/12/2007 14:39

I knew a family a few years ago whose DSs (5 and 8) found and opened all their presents a couple of nights before Christmas when the parents were out and the babysitter was watching tv! The boys got their 'punishment' on Christmas day when they had nothing left to open and no surprises.
At least yours will have things to open and some that they don't know about. I wouldn't punish them as they will feel bad enough anyway.

robin3 · 18/12/2007 14:44

Make them search the house for them against the clock...like supermarket sweep. Slows it down, makes them enjoy the process, gives you the last laugh and them (hopefully).

I remember finding my Birthday present and learnt a huge lesson because it spoilt it so I doubt they'll make the same mistake again.

barcelonababe · 18/12/2007 14:47

well, my parents were so daft they used to hide all our xmas presnets under their beds, behind the towers of towels and bedding in the cupboard and in the trunk of the car. I always knew what i was getting!!

But never told them!

doggiesayswoof · 18/12/2007 14:49

I think that's what I meant (same as tigerschick) - it's not a punishment as such, but the consequences of their actions are that they will not have all the surprises they should have had. So they are bound to learn from that.

After all they will still receive the presents, so it's surely not that awful for them?

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