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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Original poster

Worried I haven't bought enough ...

48 replies

richiebxxx · 08/12/2021 17:36

I know this is stupid but for my best friend
I have
A dressing gown
Slippers
Thermal socks and faux fur gloves and a box of celebrations
But wrapped up it doesn't look like much.
Does that seem okay?
I've spent around £50 altogether

She really loves this Valentino purse but it's another £55
I don't know what to do
Would you be happy with what I've got you ?
If you were her

OP posts:

EyesAsGreenAsAFreshPickledToad · 08/12/2021 22:52

@userxx

That's sounds perfect op. I spend around £50 to £60 on my best friend. Maybe some of the responses on here are from people without proper friends.

Your definition of a proper friend is “someone who spends 60 quid on me”? Alright then. Different strokes for different folks.

KimikosNightmare · 08/12/2021 23:14

It's impossible to say without knowing you and your friend. I've spent £145 on a silk scarf for a very old friend but I don't and never have bought any presents for any of husband's family.

The friend in question gives presents to me and my husband- one each, not joint.

Fromthebirdsnest · 09/12/2021 01:26

I usually spend quite a lot on my best friend for xmas .. I've got her a large Charlotte tilbury palette, a Tom Ford lipstick, champagne truffles and some cashmere gloves BUT I would be happy with what you got (expect for the celebrations I'd get some nicer chocolates tbh) or if she really wants the purse get it if you can afford it as well or take back what you've got and get the purse ! X

FearlessSwiftie · 09/12/2021 08:41

Wow
Does she spend that much too?
We used to do Secret Santa with friends in college but eventually switched to gift cards and Smartshow 3d christmas vids and that's it. You do you though and if there is a tradition between you then probably just compare this year's gift to the previous one? Imo you've got enough but I don't know you or your friend.

Blackmagicqueen · 09/12/2021 08:45

Jesus you spend all that on a friend? I spend 50ish on dm! How much does she usually spend on you?
You have to spend within your means and what you're comfortable with.

Blackmagicqueen · 09/12/2021 08:47

I would have gotten just the purse if that's what she really wanted and asked for.

witsendeverytime · 09/12/2021 17:54

Wow sounds plenty.

mam0918 · 09/12/2021 20:19

I'm confused, is this a brag post?

I haven't bought (or received) a Xmas gift for friends since becoming a fully grown adult with responsibilities and £55 is half what I spend on my kid and more than I spend on all my family.

My own father wouldn't spend that much on me and my kids.

Just seems insane - but for the record, if a friend gave me £55 worth of gifts I would be embarrassed and put out at their over-the-top 'generousity'.

ThePoisonousMushroom · 09/12/2021 20:21

@userxx

That's sounds perfect op. I spend around £50 to £60 on my best friend. Maybe some of the responses on here are from people without proper friends.

Gosh, I didn’t realise friends were only ‘proper’ if you spent money on them!

ThePoisonousMushroom · 09/12/2021 20:23

But FWIW, I’m not anti buying presents for friends if that’s what you’ve decided to do between you, but worrying it’s not enough? Do you think she’d be annoyed if she didn’t consider it sufficient?!

mam0918 · 09/12/2021 20:24

@userxx

That's sounds perfect op. I spend around £50 to £60 on my best friend. Maybe some of the responses on here are from people without proper friends.

I have proper friends... I like them so much I don't entitledly expect them to go bankrupt to buy me gifts.

£50-£60 is an insane amount of money for most people, anything over £10 I wouldn't be able to accept from a friend because I wouldn't cope with the guilt of knowing I was costing them money they don't really have = that is being a good friend.

userxx · 09/12/2021 20:24

@ThePoisonousMushroom Ignore the word proper, sounds like there's a lot of people on here who don't have friends, let alone a best friend. Fair enough, but why the shock that others are happy to spend that on someone they love 🤷‍♂️.

ThePoisonousMushroom · 09/12/2021 20:28

[quote userxx]@ThePoisonousMushroom Ignore the word proper, sounds like there's a lot of people on here who don't have friends, let alone a best friend. Fair enough, but why the shock that others are happy to spend that on someone they love 🤷‍♂️. [/quote]
Equally, just because people don’t buy gifts for their friends, doesn’t mean they don’t have any 🤷🏻‍♀️.
I have a few best friends, we’ve been friends for over 30 years. We’ve never bought each other Christmas presents, but I don’t think that means they’re not ‘proper’ friends!
Anyway as I said, I’m not anti people buying presents for friends if that’s what they want to do. What’s weird through is that the OP is worried it’s not ‘enough’. Surely a proper friend wouldn’t kick off about their present pile looking to meagre? Which is why I suspect there’s more to it.

ThePoisonousMushroom · 09/12/2021 20:29

*too

StrongerOrWeaker · 09/12/2021 20:29

What did you get her for previous Christmases? What did she get you? I think you need to look at the sort of precedents that were set.

Ponoka7 · 09/12/2021 20:30

I don't understand why you didn't just buy the purse. But go by what you both spent on previous years.

MiracleBaby2022 · 09/12/2021 20:33

Crikey - I don't even buy that much for my mother. 🤔 Thinking about it, I really should! But not for a friend. I'd spend £5-10 perhaps on something lovely like a lovely scented candle together with some homemade cookies of some sort, plus a nice card. Sometimes I'll do homemade sloe gin or rosehip syrups in nice bottles - that kind of thing.

userxx · 09/12/2021 20:39

@ThePoisonousMushroom absolutely not, my best friend would be happy with a half eaten chocolate orange. When it's gets competitive and you're stressing then it's not fun.

Redsquirrel5 · 09/12/2021 21:08

It sounds lovely if that is what you both spend.

My best friend has lots of grandchildren I bought her a gorgeous bottle of gin for £15 ( trade price) she was delighted. I gave her some homemade things as well. This year she is getting Christmas Chutney.
Some food items and some homemade liqueur.
We often make sloe gin, Chutney, jam, marmalade and include that in our gifts.
I don’t want her spending lots of money on me she has enough to buy.
We have a great friendship.

Newmum110 · 09/12/2021 21:13

If she really wants the purse I would get her that and return the other items / gift them elsewhere if not possible.

kowari · 09/12/2021 21:15

Are they things you know your friend needs and would appreciate? Personally, I'd have bought one thing, likely the purse if I was spending that much.

userxx · 09/12/2021 21:48

The purse would be an extra £55, I'd be more than happy with what the op has bought.

CrimbleCrumble1 · 09/12/2021 22:31

Fight the urge to buy more, I get this urge every year and if I give in I realise on Christmas Day the extra stuff really wasn’t necessary.

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