How do people afford Christmas?

[Poppets14]

Just been out Christmas shopping and have had to use my credit card and store cards.

We are remortgaging the house in February and paying off our debts so we are back at square 1.
We are in about 4K worth of debt so not a massive amount.

My question is how do people afford Christmas? Everything is just so expensive.

Do you save all year?
Buy throughout the year?

We are getting are finances in order next year and I do not want to fall into the debt hole again!

I remember an Xmas in the 1970s.

My mum took my brother and me for a walk where we found an old branch, this was then sprayed silver and became out tree - it was actually cool in a 70s type way.

We made some tree ornaments by wrapping match boxes in kitchen foil and tying with string to look like parcels. Both my parents smoked so many match boxes around.

*She’s having a sylvanian family house from Father Christmas £100

My little pony toys £60

The rest adds up so quickly! I try to buy her useful things like PJs and I’ve got her a lunch box.

Her stocking probably comes to about £20

She isn’t spoilt*

Thats shocking and what a horrible lesson to teach her.

We do stockings from St. Nick (as the REAL tradition is) and its under £6

Santa/Father Xmas (the magical made up man) brings a sack of 12 items costing £12 (includes things like a slinky, ball game, whistle, wooden toy etc... classic cheap toys).

How do you think it looks when your daughter is telling kids at school that she got £160 (more than we spend on everything) worth of big gifts from Santa and a stocking ontop of more gifts from family?

Those gifts should be from you not Santa if you insist on them.

Also if she is asking for and expecting these things then she is spoilt... spoilt isn't what you get (so people get loads and are not spoilt) but rather what you think you're owed, writing lists with £1000 worth of stuff on is spoilt.

@Morgan12

I honestly wasn't being goady, I just genuinely don't know how people manage to not overspend. Last year my eldest asked for a ps5 that cost £450. Surely that was on alot of lists? I can't be alone in thinking £300 is low. I wish I could spend £300.

You say no? . It doesn't matter how much families spend, but people going into debt as they cannot afford to spend hundreds on presents but do so because they feel pressure to is really sad. It can still be a lovely Christmas without new games consoles etc. Yes their friends might get x, y, z which good for them if their parents can afford it; there are always disparities in lifestyle etc.

@Morgan12

I honestly wasn't being goady, I just genuinely don't know how people manage to not overspend. Last year my eldest asked for a ps5 that cost £450. Surely that was on alot of lists? I can't be alone in thinking £300 is low. I wish I could spend £300.

So you spent the £450 because you could afford it, I presume? Many people don’t have the choice to spend £450, as they don’t have it available to spend.

Threads like this make me wish we had a Thanksgiving tradition and then Christmas goes back to the smaller religious festival it's supposed to be. One day, no large gifts, just having a day to spend with loved ones and some nice food. The huge spending amounts tossed about on this thread are just grim, no wonder many kids don't understand the meaning of 'No' - I have employed the teenagers these spoiled kids grow into and they don't last long.

EatSleepRantRepeat there are also other threads where families have a very small budget and many posters are sharing their experiences and making lovely low cost suggestions.

@EatSleepRantRepeat

Threads like this make me wish we had a Thanksgiving tradition and then Christmas goes back to the smaller religious festival it's supposed to be. One day, no large gifts, just having a day to spend with loved ones and some nice food. The huge spending amounts tossed about on this thread are just grim, no wonder many kids don't understand the meaning of 'No' - I have employed the teenagers these spoiled kids grow into and they don't last long.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It’s really the perfect holiday. It’s just good food and family.

@ThePoisonousMushroom

This has been mentioned a few times by a few people but it makes me a bit sad to think that adults might not get any presents at all then. Like if I didnt buy for my mum and shovelled that into my kids presents, she'd get nothing. As would I come to think of it if everyone else took the kids only mantra (lone parent). Quite frankly my children have a great and really easy life and certainly are not deserving of ALL my resources, such as they are. I like in a very modest way to mark the end of the year by giving a small number of adults in my life who mean so much to me a token of my affection. If that means my childs presents cost 100 instead of 200 to enable me to do so, I think that's no bad thing

I agree. My mum only has me. My brother died in his 20’s, her parents are dead, she’s never had another partner since her and my dad divorced. She’s still working aged 65 and will be working until she’s 70 to pay her mortgage. I happily buy less for my children in order to be able to get her something.

I agree... the no gifts for adults things only benefit the tight-fisted and privileged (who have partners and children and friends to all buy for them) when it does not have to cost a lot to show you still care, a pocket full of pennies and a little bit of brain space is all it has to cost.

After all the years my parents made Xmas magical for me I couldn't imagine not even bothering to get them even a token gift - you can pay it back and forward in life.

Once these people are old, widowed, alone etc... and realise they taught their kids not to care about other family they will realise their mistake all to late though though.

@ThePoisonousMushroom

£300 is only 3 presents if the presents cost around £100 each… nothing my kids have asked for costs that much. I know it will be different when they’re teens, but the OP’s DD is only 7.

I have a teen and non of his gifts were £100 though.

He's getting a gaming set (keyboard, mouse and headset) and wireless headphones + other stuff (board game, fidget toys, fugler, robot wars mini robot etc...) and it cost under £50 all together for that stuff.

I think some people need to get off their Christmas high horse. I will spend what I like on my kids. We have lovely ‘cheap’ traditions too like making paper chains for the sitting room, collecting & decorating pine cones etc and a couple of extra presents doesn’t make them spoilt- they’re 2 of the nicest kids you could meet. I’ve had many years when money was tight, I spent less and still made it nice but I didn’t begrudge other people the nice things they had and try to make out their Christmas was soulless. This reminds me of a conversation with DM bitching about her friend’s husband buying an expensive new car- she can’t afford one so that makes it obscene for anyone to have one.

@sashh

I remember an Xmas in the 1970s.

My mum took my brother and me for a walk where we found an old branch, this was then sprayed silver and became out tree - it was actually cool in a 70s type way.

We made some tree ornaments by wrapping match boxes in kitchen foil and tying with string to look like parcels. Both my parents smoked so many match boxes around.

I remember spraying twigs too 🤣. Those were the days 🤭

Its not about a high horse @SockFluffInTheBath and I have plenty resources of my own so there's no jealousy - it's the overconsumption, the impact on the environment from excess plastic and shipping, and the lesson kids are learning that love = buying stuff. I receive one present at Christmas (from my DH) because it's a waste of our family time shopping for stuff we don't actually need.

I think some people need to get off their Christmas high horse. I will spend what I like on my kids

Me as well.

It's always like that on here. Along with the competitive who washes themselves, their bedding, their clothes the least threads.

Minging and tight purse strings are cool

@SockFluffInTheBath

I think some people need to get off their Christmas high horse. I will spend what I like on my kids. We have lovely ‘cheap’ traditions too like making paper chains for the sitting room, collecting & decorating pine cones etc and a couple of extra presents doesn’t make them spoilt- they’re 2 of the nicest kids you could meet. I’ve had many years when money was tight, I spent less and still made it nice but I didn’t begrudge other people the nice things they had and try to make out their Christmas was soulless. This reminds me of a conversation with DM bitching about her friend’s husband buying an expensive new car- she can’t afford one so that makes it obscene for anyone to have one.

But the whole point of the thread is that the OP is struggling to finance Christmas… how is that helped by people coming on to say they spend £1000’s? People are trying to help the OP see that you can spend less and still have a lovely Christmas.

@EatSleepRantRepeat it’s a stretch to assume it’s all plastic crap or overconsumption, or that kids equate stuff with love. The assumption (that word again) that a pile of presents=hollow Christmas is tosh. I resent that implication- unless you’re spending your entire Christmas in church and feeding the needy, because surely that’s what a ‘real’ Christmas is? I can only speak for my own family but this house is full of love and the time together is really special, more so this year after a spectacularly shitty year. The presents are an aside and come from me getting my jollies from giving, not from letters to santa.

Those gifts should be from you not Santa if you insist on them.

I really don't think that has to be a rigid rule. Families can do it their own way and it doesn't usually cause problems. Most kids have stopped believing in Santa before they figure out really how much things cost.

@ThePoisonousMushroom to reply to the OP many of us said we save, or buy stuff through the year. Then we get lambasted for having empty plastic Christmas

The OP did save throughout the year, she says so in her OP. You can only save what you actually have though.

[quote SockFluffInTheBath]@EatSleepRantRepeat it’s a stretch to assume it’s all plastic crap or overconsumption, or that kids equate stuff with love. The assumption (that word again) that a pile of presents=hollow Christmas is tosh. I resent that implication- unless you’re spending your entire Christmas in church and feeding the needy, because surely that’s what a ‘real’ Christmas is? I can only speak for my own family but this house is full of love and the time together is really special, more so this year after a spectacularly shitty year. The presents are an aside and come from me getting my jollies from giving, not from letters to santa.[/quote]
We do go to church and help the foodbank, yes. Because Christmas is a religious festival about helping the needy, Christ was born in a stable and was unlikely to have had the money for the equivalent of a computer console. However I'm conscious I'm derailing the thread so I'll stop there.

We are from a huge family and everyone insists on buying for everyone else. I use the two for £10 offers for everyone so basically everyone but my own kids get a fiver spent on them. I don't care if they don't like the present it's a gesture to show I love them and I'd rather not be buying a bit of plastic shit that's just going to landfill soon anyway but that's the situation we're all in.

I tend to split my budget up to so in September I buy any Christmas experiences (panto etc) that was a cheap one last year. October I'll buy something for dh, November once the Christmas offers are out I'll buy everyone else's and December I'll buy my kids stuff and Christmas food. I never spend a fortune on my kids because they get shit loads off the rest of the family anyway and actually sometimes find it a bit overwhelming. I'm also not averse to buying second hand if it's still in the box or if the kid in question is too young to realise.

Because Christmas is a religious festival about helping the needy, Christ was born in a stable and was unlikely to have had the money for the equivalent of a computer console

To.you maybe. It's a massive - - piss up-- celebration of food, friends and family here.

Problem with Christmas is that too many people overspend and then have to deal with the consequences, people who are in debt / on tight financial pursestrings shouldn't feel they 'have to' give gifts, too much of the stuff is actually unnecessarily, not to mention the environmental costs of single use items, stuff that has to be manufactured, shipped to UK and ends up in the bin anyway?

I have told my mum no Christmas crackers this year because they are my pet hate - waste of money and extremely environmentally unfriendly. Does that make me the grinch? Possibly but I don't care.

You can get totally recyledabke crackers with no plastic. That's what we do.

@Lightisnotwhite

No idea. It’s not just a case of spending £10 on presents. It’s advent calendars. Yes some only cost a couple of quid but it all adds up It starts in December with nights out or invites to meet up. That’s a night out or a bottle of wine respectively. Possibly a new outfit/nails/ hair depending on event. Petrol, babysitters Then it’s food for people you have over. It’s decorating/replacements lights/ Christmas tree. Food for Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day. And of course presents.

Of course no needs to buy any of this stuff but it’s not the height of extravagance to buy any of this. It’s pretty much the norm.

I think it can certainly feel the norm if everyone in your social circle does this. This is why I know people on high salaries who don't have much left at the end of the month and don't see themselves as well-off. Their monthly outgoings are huge because they see hair appointments, nails and personal trainers as the bare minimum.

The reality is those of us on low incomes buy cheap advent calendars. We don't go on nights out but maybe meet for a cup of coffee, no new outfit, hair cut or nails. We use the same decorations every year and food is as usual with a few treats. Presents are what we can afford and include needed items.

On the other hand, I have to say it makes me laugh when well-off people claim how frugal they are at Christmas only buying their partner a 2nd hand mug! Well, yes because they already have everything they could need or want. For those of us on a low income Christmas is the time we can ask our partner for something we need - so yes that is probably not a 2nd hand mug!

We don't go into debt for presents. If we're struggling, then we lower the spending amount. We save x amount per month (depending on how much we have left) and thats our gift total come November. We'll dip into the Christmas savings if we see something on sale throughout the year that would make a good present.
Food is our biggest expense.