How do people afford Christmas?

[Poppets14]

Just been out Christmas shopping and have had to use my credit card and store cards.

We are remortgaging the house in February and paying off our debts so we are back at square 1.
We are in about 4K worth of debt so not a massive amount.

My question is how do people afford Christmas? Everything is just so expensive.

Do you save all year?
Buy throughout the year?

We are getting are finances in order next year and I do not want to fall into the debt hole again!

How old is your DD? £300 on a teen is probably not unusual but it’s a lot to spend on a child of primary age or younger imho.

DCs received 'big' presents last year. This year their budget is £60 each. They have their winter wardrobe already so coats, trainers, tracksuits - a lot of the bigger spends have been made.

I do not buy for family, friends or their children. Stopped doing this years ago and feel relieved to be honest, particularly when I read so many "what can I buy for my mum/dad/sister" posts on MN. It can get to the point where you buy gifts for the sake of buying them or for people who are really not in need of anything.

1. I've been following Christmas bargain thread for 6 yrs & saved an absolute fortune. This is the latest thread:

Thread 20 - the one with a drowning Gary Barlow in hot chocolate503

1. I sell unwanted & old household items throughout the year & save it in a long term deposit account just for gifts.

1. I buy for my immediate family and family children only. Have cut down my list significantly.

1. I make a note each Yr of food wasted or not eaten & buy less the next Yr to reduce wastage.

1. I use topcashback for all online purchases & use the cashback for gifts. Same with store points etc.

@BertiesShoes

Made the mistake of discussing Christmas shopping with some of the school mums and realised it is NOT enough, one mum was spending £400 on 2 tracksuits for her DD

So does that mean you will go into debt to keep up with school mums who have bigger budgets? Or can you easily afford more?

Christmas shopping is not a competition - my adult kids don’t remember what they got at Christmas, but they do know they had lovely times and both love Christmas as a result.

Absolutely not, I have worked too hard to get out of debt to go back into it over presents! But I am going to increase my monthly savings for next year so it's not so much of a squeeze. We underestimated how much Christmas would cost us so it's still a stress, hopefully that won't be the same next year

We start very early so we can buy bit by bit, and shop around to try and get things cheaply when we can.

Most importantly, we live within our means of what we can actually afford. I’d love to buy the kids everything they want but unfortunately that’s not possible, so they get a couple of things they want. We also buy things that they need and use that as a present - not school uniforms and bedding of course! But ds11 and dd10 both have hobbies that can be expensive. I’ll buy the basics through the year but if they want expensive optional equipment or clothing then that’s one of their gifts. Otherwise we just simply couldn’t afford it.

WombatChocolate's post was very insightful and bang-on, I think. We are not wealthy, but nor are we hard-up, and we have never spent £300 per child on Christmas presents.

In a way though, all 'how do people afford x?!' type threads are a bit pointless. There's no magic answer. They afford it because they either have more money, spend less or go into debt.

Hi OP,

When I was on very tight finances we just had very low maximum budget for presents and we wrote round to each other and asked what everybody would like so we didn't buy anything that would not be useful.

So maximum £10 for each person and it would be a book token usually or cash in a Christmas card so we could spend it wisely.

Well done on getting on top of your debt. That is really brilliant work.

I know that sounds a bit mean saying ‘live within our means’ as if I’m looking down on others but it’s not that - we are working class and don’t have much money but I know people who have about the same and go into debt on their Argos card/credit/klarna/little woods to buy lots of extremely expensive gifts. Their kids have brilliant Christmas hauls but we just can’t afford that so we don’t do it. Ours only get a few presents but they understand that we give what we can afford and they seem to have similar levels of happiness opening 3/4 gifts than my friend’s daughter has opening 20/30. I honestly think the excitement peters out after a few gifts anyway.

I actually disagree completely.

As someone who is well below the poverty line, only making £6k in the last year and £11k the years before and with friends in similar financial positions I don't know ANYONE that would spend £300 on one child at xmas.

We do big Xmases non of that twee little middle-class poem shite about 'want, need, wear, read' but we literally cant spend money we don't have.

I notice however what always transpires is those 4 gift people that quote that are usually buying 4 high-priced items (Ipads, designer or big brand clothes, collectors book anthologies and so on) that cost 4x more than our 'big Christmas' while berating us to cut back and think of those less fortunate .

I don't even know many people with a mortgage not because its 'paid off' but because they can't get mortgages, credit cards, loans on their income so you can only spend what you physically have - debt is a luxury of richer people who never needed to learn basic money management.

I notice however what always transpires is those 4 gift people that quote that are usually buying 4 high-priced items (Ipads, designer or big brand clothes, collectors book anthologies and so on) that cost 4x more than our 'big Christmas'

I’ve noticed these 4 present people are often those who can afford to buy toys and things throughout the year. We don’t do a massive Christmas but when ds needs a laptop for school (as I imagine he will next year) it will probably be a gift, whereas lots of parents who do a poem like that would just go out and get it. Same with bikes, new bikes have always been Christmas or birthday gifts because otherwise we wouldn’t be able to afford it.

At the end of the day I think just give what you can. Christmas isn’t made out of loads of presents, and the thoughtfulness of the gifts matters too.

The Bank of England estimates that the average household spends an extra £740 in December so a lot of the replies here must be from the more economical mumsnetters.

www.bankofengland.co.uk/knowledgebank/how-much-do-we-spend-at-christmas

There was a thread a few weeks ago in which the poster planned to spend £300 on her teenage daughter for birthday and Christmas. That was about the limit of what she could afford but there were still plenty of posts suggesting that she was not spending enough. Had you been on that thread, Poppets14, you'd probably have been criticised for not being generous enough!

I do put money aside in a savings account but I resent the awful interest rates which are much lower than inflation. I heard on the news today that inflation is expected to be 5% by next spring.

I think the answer is to match spending and expectations as much as possible. Reading the thread I couldn't help wondering if all the recipients of the bargains bought in sales, charity shops and made by hand were as enamoured of them as the donor? I have a friend who buys me ornaments or jokey things that are not my taste at all. She often accidentally leaves the price on too so I know that they did not cost very much. Luckily she is a good friend so I don't mind too much. I'd also love to have a secret santa with a limit of £15 but sadly I'm the only one that would accept that in my family.

I only buy presents for my kids, I start buying in October time, I don't buy a huge amount of presents. I don't overbuy on food, I buy some treats like posh crisps, nuts and chocs and just have a normal day.

I start buying in august once the summer sales start. Little and often.

@nettie434

I think the thing about that post was that firstly she could afford to spend more, and secondly she was rolling the child’s birthday and Christmas into one gift. She was also saying things like ‘I bought her a coat’ and ‘we go to the winter wonderland.’

There were lots of issues on there other than money, but mostly it was the tone of the op that she didn’t think the gifts her dd wanted were ‘worthy’ and that’s why she didn’t want to spend more.

And also if we’re thinking of the same thread the woman wanted to spend £150 across both holidays, so £75 each.

I usually just start buying stuff in September and don't save as much for the last three or so pay packets of the year.

We don't have much excess income so have always done Christmas cheaply. When dcs were small I would buy a few bits in the January sales and stash away for next year, along with things I could pick up second hand. As they got older presents were more expensive but we always made it clear we were limited in what we could afford. They are now at uni.

Between us DH and I spend around £400 on presents - £150 each for dcs, £20 each for their cousins, £20 for family secret santa (aunts and uncles) and a couple of bits for neighbours. DH and I buy each other books.

We are fortunate that we have extended family close by so celebrate Christmas together which makes it feel special - we go for a walk, have a big meal and play silly games. It makes the day an occasion but I can imagine without that there might be more emphasis on presents.

Absolutely agree on the class/income point. When we were struggling when DD and DS were tiny, I felt very conscious of what we were able to get them, and not wanting to appear as though we were struggling. Now we're much more comfortably off, I just don't have that worry, and I'm not batting an eye at getting them 4-5 gifts each totalling about £150 each.

I save from October-October so I start shopping end of Oct.

I have two boys. I spend way too much but I save hard throughout the year and they don't get much between. I would never ever get in debt for it through.

In our family we do an adult stocking, and adult gift and a child's main gift. Kind of like a secret Santa for a set amount agreed in January by all of us which means you are only buying 3 presents instead of 6 nieces and nephews, 2 parents and granny! We do the exact same for birthdays so you only but one adult and one child gift for the year. We draw straws in January. It works for my side of the family. We buy and wrap less.

We save monthly for Xmas. £150 x 11 months.

My daughter is 7.5

She has a list a mile long!

She believes in Father Christmas and has a list for him and a separate list for mummy and daddy

Father Christmas delivers 1 large present, 10 ish medium presents and her stocking

1 big one £60 from us and she knows we do her Christmas Eve box

I don’t ever intend on spending all that on her but everything just adds up!

My nieces are late teens - I feel I can’t give less than £25 cash as they have expensive tastes!

I spend £50 my mum (demanding mother)
£25 each on my husbands parents

Kanaloa - you've remembered that thread better than me. Yes, I can see how that might have influenced the replies.

@StrongLegs

Hi OP,

When I was on very tight finances we just had very low maximum budget for presents and we wrote round to each other and asked what everybody would like so we didn't buy anything that would not be useful.

So maximum £10 for each person and it would be a book token usually or cash in a Christmas card so we could spend it wisely.

Well done on getting on top of your debt. That is really brilliant work.

Thank you

I mean it sounds in that case like you’ve set expectations too high for the child. We don’t do Santa but my kids know they get a few gifts from us and some things from mil & fil. We also don’t do Christmas Eve boxes, 10 plus gifts on the day etc.

@lazylinguist

WombatChocolate's post was very insightful and bang-on, I think. We are not wealthy, but nor are we hard-up, and we have never spent £300 per child on Christmas presents.

In a way though, all 'how do people afford x?!' type threads are a bit pointless. There's no magic answer. They afford it because they either have more money, spend less or go into debt.

The reason I asked is because I want to be more organised next year and just wanted some ideas